Favourite Joke


I worked out 6 hours every day for 20 years. Anyone can do it.

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It's funny because that's what The Rock actually does.

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lol lol

"You're watching too much Sopranos, when you give your kids their allowance in envelopes"

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^This indeed 

Praise from the praise-worthy is beyond all rewards.
http://ow.ly/buqc302drQZ

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My favorite joke was when they were stealing the plane and Kevin Hart had to distract the security guard. When he told him he had a dick in the cooler and the security guard said "I am made of questions" LMAO

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Hahaha! Me too and I loved Snake Gyllenhall. I know it was silly but effective. The thing he said about unicorns after Clavin complimented his shirt was also hilarious. I don't remember it exactly though.

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Snake Gyllenhall and some of the credits stuff - I laughed a lot.

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The bit about sixteen candles, not exact.. but from recall

DJ - Sixteen Candles is my fav movie.... you've seen it right?
KH - I'm black

---Listen, ..do you smell something?---

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"First of all: F_ck Mark Zuckerberg."
"Is that a fanny pack, Bob? Hell yeah, dude! You want one? I got two at home. I'll hook you up. FANNY!"
"You're like a snack size Denzel."


Plenty of good one liners peppered about, and it proves that Dwayne Johnson is great at comedy when given a good script. He knows how to balance the tough guy and comedic goofball elements masterfully.


Action Hero's Anthem
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y9Cpb61R-4U

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roryflast,

you suck.

That was my favorite joke and I shall begin that regiment as of today.


I don't let anyone hot-comb out my HAIRitage!

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People work an average 6 hours a day, every day, for their last 20 years. Why would you work out for 6 hours a day, every day? Could not 20 sit ups and 100 push ups suffice for a workout to be in the shape Johnson has become? And then being regularly active for your daily routine, to maintain good health?

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You are obviously without a clue in these matters.

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No. I have a clue on these matters of fitness. Since my weight has fluctuated over the years, I know what I do right and wrong.

20 sit ups and 100 push ups in the morning.
Bike ride to work.
Work in a labouring job for 8 hours a day, 5 days a week (max). If you have an office job, you would need to lift weights and train.
Bike ride home from work.
Healthy eating. Constructive psychological conditioning.
Plenty of sleep.

I have worked as a delivery driver for the passing 4 years. Even though it includes heavy lifting and fast walking, you can underperform at work during the less strenuous times and down time in work.

Obviously, Johnson works out every day for a couple hours per day. More for his movie and wrestling roles. But I bet he could maintain his general body fitness just with a regular labouring job, and active lifestyle.

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Are you at 7% body fat like The Rock??? If not then your method is not the the same..

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I was not saying for me. It's been a long time since I have taken the effort to do 100 push ups a day, numerous sit-ups, jog, and bike ride my way around town. That is going back 14 years. If I kept that up until today, I would have a decent fit body.

But, *beep* Johnson needs to do more than an hour in the morning, and an hour in the afternoon gym work to have a good physique. Reckon he could keep a body shape he was in during the filming of the movie with a couple hours a day 6 days a week training.

And another thing. If you worked out 6 hours a day 7 days a week, you would not be able to be a good agent with the CIA, unless you were one of the muscle of the team. You would need to do a 14 hour day (6 hours training, and 8 hours working as an agent) to be doing something constructive. Not even Olympians have those sorts of training schedules.

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"You're like Jason Bourne...but in jorts!"

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"You're like Jason Bourne...but in jorts!"


I didn't even know what he was referring to until after the movie then I busted a gut!
Jean shorts!!!

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Haven't seen the movie, but the tagline on the poster is pretty clever.


"People get it wrong, but in today's world we don't live longer, we just die harder." -Bruce Willis

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"You're like a black Will Smith"
I'm not even sure why that's funny but the delivery cracked me up. Unexpectedly good film.

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"Like a mini Will Smith".

So many good lines.

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It was "A black Will Smith"

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I agree, this was mine too. Hart's response was perfect. Something like, "I don't know if that's racist but I'll take it as a compliment. "

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