What the hell is wrong with Joel that he calls it quits over 1 damn kiss? What kind of man doesn't fight for his woman, with that relationship that used to be so perfect and so solid? Ugh I'm just disgusted with him.
shareFighting for a woman? That sounds desperate and old fashioned. He should have immediately found a new girlfriend.
shareIt wasn't always perfect and solid. Joel explains that later in the season (because it took that long for the writers to realize that they split up for no reason).
You have a black, you have a Chinese, you have a pregnant.
The split was a culmination of many things. The two of them were at odds over Victor's serious academic issues, so there was that (and the overall stress that the adoption put them through). Them Julia quit her job and tried to be a stay at home mom, but she quickly cracked when she realized that she couldn't handle her own kids...and that was right when Joel was trying to get back into his working career. Deep down, he probably resented the fact that she couldn't hold down the fort for a while so he could do his thing, after he had done exactly that for her for many years.
Of course, none of it is black and white, and in hindsight, the issues in their marriage absolutely could have been fixed long before Joel moved out of the house. Yes, Julia made mistakes, and yes, he was kind of a baby about all of it, but the important thing is that they found their way back. Truthfully, lots of people break up for dumb reasons in real life, but if they can eventually work it out, then that's what matters.
It's that 'jump the shark' moment from the show in my opinion.
Joel & Julia breaking up over such an insignificant matter was the weakest point of the series.
If you were with us over the summer we had some fun kicking it around.
(search previous threads).
Rosek2 is exactly right, also they both agree their problem is lack of communication. Case in point: Joel buys Victor a cellphone as a quick fix without first talking with Julia.
And in the beginning Joel says to Julia, "I'll never cheat on you." We find out in season 5 that his father continually cheated on his mother, which is why that commitment is so important to Joel.
That whole storyline had my blood boiling sooooo freaking much!! I think especially because I really loved Joel prior to that, so it was intensely frustrating that he became such a jerk at that point.
To me, the thing that went unsaid in that whole situation was that it's not like things had been a okay between them and meanwhile Julia was sneaking off to spend time with Ed. No, Julia had been trying and trying to talk to Joel about how hard a time she was having being out of work, and she continuously tried to reach out to him for support while they were going through the troubles with Victor, and Joel would basically call her selfish or unsupportive for not just being completely great and able to deal with every curveball 100% on her own, and then walk away. For as much as Joel had kept bringing up the fact that he did the stay at home parent thing for years while Julia worked, Julia NEVER shut him out like that! How many scenes were there in the first few seasons of Julia answering Joel's calls even when she was ridiculously busy, and generally still giving a lot to the relationship even though she had tons of work to do? Yet then when Julia is calling and calling Joel and he's blatantly ignoring her to have a nice dinner at work, and she FINALLY comes over there to try and actually talk to her husband, somehow that's all on her and she's the one who's changed and is making horrible choices??
I just think, the kiss aside, Joel was never once called out on the huge role he played in Julia getting to the point where she would have a bit of an emotional affair with someone else who was actually supporting her in the first place! That did not come out of nowhere, and I just wanted so badly for Joel to step up and take some damn responsibility for the fact that Julia had WANTED to come to him for emotional support and he pushed her away, and that's the only reason she got as close with Ed as she did in the first place.
Aaaanyway, with that crazy long ramble out of the way (sorry, I have a lot of feelings about that storyline lol), I will say that he very much redeemed himself in my eyes in season 6 :) I think it speaks a lot toward the writing and also toward Erika Christensen and Sam Jaeger's acting that even after all that Joel and Julia were still one of my top favorite couples by the end ^__^ They have so much chemistry and Joel really is a great character. He just.. you know, went through a major jerk mode for a while there haha
Oh Bambi, I cried so hard when those hunters shot your mommy. - Kurt Hummel
stephlem89- I COMPLETELY 100% AGREE!!! I am just getting to the part where they have separated. As this whole thing is playing out and Joel is placing all of the blame on Julia. I wanted to yell at Joel. I was so frustrated that he ignored her and shut her out about holding Victor back (he was so against it) and wouldn't listen to Julia. Calling her selfish, all these nasty and ridiculous names for no reason. That was the start of the strain between them.
What high horse is he riding? Didn't he get close with that Buddha mom in the first season? Like come on. Sure, I wish the kiss didn't happen but it did. And he did nothing to fight for their marriage, he used it as an excuse to walk away instead.
I just didn't expect it from Joel to become this bitter, critical, nasty jerk.
I'm on season 5 ep 19 right now, I completely agree with you. I was getting so frustrated I actually googled this so that I could see if anyone was talking about this... Have they forgotten that Joel had an "affair" too (as he likes to call it when Julia was kissed by another man) and he was kissed by that mom in the beginning. That was way worse too because they had a happy marriage and he was spending so much time with her and he was "worshipped" by the other mom's and was being flirted with all day long while Julia was at work.
In season 5 ep. 19 specifically around 24min. "it's not fair" and he's whining about her "affair with Ed" and she tries to say she didn't have an affair and he says "whatever it is"... Then he complains about how she was cooking dinner with this guy and bringing their kids over there and sharing long intimate texts with him, wasn't that EXACTLY what he was doing with that mom from the earlier seasons? AND that went on MUCH longer AND he didn't tell her about this kiss until a really long time after. I want her to bring that up so badly! She forgave him and I think that was much worse than what she did and he should be a man and live at home with his family while they work this out.
Did you guys notice that too? Do you think what Joel did earlier is worse than the kiss between Ed and Julia?
I cam on here to specifically look at this. Because I could not find a good reason why he decided to leave Julia. I mean he WAS at work all the time when Julia was having a hard time with Victor. But then he screams and berates her. The time she threw the toys on the stairs and got mad at her kids for being messy....that is seriously someone cracking? Because I've lost my *beep* over stupider stuff than that and I've lost it way worse.
It's such a lame story line. Their relationship was one of my favorites.