What I learned from watching this movie...
1. "What I Learned" threads will degenerate into discussions of the lack of humor and the factual accuracy of the post initiator's comments and who "schooled" whom.
2. To achieve maximum 1984-like cheesiness in your evening news broadcast, you should backlight the set so it looks like a Cold War Soviet propaganda broadcast. A bad haircut on the newsreader helps to maximize this effect.
3. When fleeing a meteorite impact blast wave, you should park your vehicle as far from safety as possible, thus maximizing the chances of your assistant dying.
4. When you're fleeing a major blast wave and your partner has parked the vehicle far from safety, you should go back for the equipment.
5. When returning home from almost dying in a comet impact, you should stop at the foot of the walkway and make your wife run all the way to you.
6. High school kids still settle minor disputes by racing their impossibly cool cars for pink slips .. just like they did in "Grease."
7. Having a step-mom as a teacher automatically sucks.
8. Science rats don't make policy.
9. Electromagnetic storms pass in visible waves.
10. Working telephone booths still exist.
11. Presidential science advisors are always wrong ... spectacularly wrong.
12. When your chief science advisor tells you he cannot give you a definitive answer to a science question, you should accuse him of covering his ass and yell at him for an answer.
13. Old Russian diesel submarines can get anywhere in the Pacific in less than 48 hours and can submerge to any depth. Luckily, one will be fueled and ready on the West Coast of the US whenever you happen to need it.
14. On the street outside of Bob's Billiards in Lindenville is a dangerous place to be.
15. When you pull someone up from a chasm and both of you collapse immediately afterward, you will be 4 feet from the edge of the chasm.
16. When disintegrating, the earth's magnetic field resembles a bizarre Spyrograph drawing.
17. Discussions about averting the immediate destruction of the planet should should be limited to two scientists, a general, and the president.
18. Soldiers with orders to keep you in a building will watch as you walk out carrying a suitcase and won't even blink as you drive away.
19. Only after the plane bringing warheads to you from far away blows up in mid-fight is it okay to use the warheads stored nearby.
20. Two middle-aged desk jockeys can lift a crate of nuclear warheads into the back of a truck without assistance and without exerting themselves.
21. A diesel-engined army truck can be repaired in the field using parts taken from a gasoline-powered SUV.
22. Cameras can easily record events thousands of meters underwater despite frigid temperatures and a lack of light.
23. When electromagnetic waves are shorting out electrical items, you should send the world-saving explosives out into the frigid depths with an electrical timer.
24. Control panels in old Russian diesel submarines are labelled in English.
25. Old Russian diesel submarines should use underwater steam vents to propel themselves to the surface - instead of emptying the ballast tanks.
26. Resetting the earth's magnetic core using a nuclear explosion deep underwater will result in so precise a reset that, afterward, a sundial will match a pre-reset digital watch exactly.