Just Rewatched: The Review I wrote 8 Years Ago Still Accurate.

This film truly moved me!

"Bravissimo!" I cried as tears ran down my cheek. After the Matt Damon song ended, everyone still in the theatre was giving a standing ovation, but eventually an usher said I had to leave.

I have listened to all of Beethoven's Symphonies, I have seen the Sistine Chapel, and I have been to the Alamo, but I never truly lived until I saw Disaster Movie.

This film isn't for everyone. These films movies are avant-garde attempts to introduce the art style of Dadaism into cinema. Film Dadaism, as well as Dadaism, is defined as "anti-art, anti-bourgeois and anarchist in nature, often with strong anti-war themes." However, if you're a type of person that likes Salvador Dali's art or can respect Picasso's cubism painting techniques, this film may become your favorite movie. You have to remember that the rejection of art is in fact art. This film is such a refutation of traditional cinema conventions that it doesn't even have a proper title! The film begins with the most complicated and unconventional love triangle I've ever seen. Will (played by the talented method actor Matt Lanter) wakes up in a bed with his beautiful girlfriend Amy (portrayed by the lovely Vanessa Lachey), flava flav, and a midget. What follows is an awkward break-up, and a series of disasters that keep him and his girlfriend apart. She gets trapped under a golden Egyptian statue (symbolic of world economies crumbling and keeping the middle class oppressed). Along the way, Dadaistic notions are explored. As he overcomes each disaster, he learns a little more about human ethos (ethics) while using his logos (logic) to near his pathos (love).

I could literally spend hours analyzing the minutiae Seltzer and Friedberg have put into every single scene. For instance, in one scene, Will is banding with 3 people, on the brink of death via tornado, and they all start cheering for a hero to show up. As soon as Iron Man shows up to rescue them, he gets squashed by a falling cow, which turns him into a metal can. This is like Mother Earth is saying "Enough with the industrial military complex that gave birth to war machines like Iron Man! Bring about peace and start recycling!" A strong element of Dadaism is antiwar, and this is a blatantly anti-war joke, so it comes as no surprise that the war-mongering, rich Republican film critics hate these films so much.

At this point, I began to look around the theater and realized that most of the people in the theater were young lads in the 11-14 age range. No wonder the bourgeoisie critics hate these films so much! They are popular with the youth and promote a worldview they don't share, namely anti-war. These are tomorrow's leaders. These are the people that are going to solve poverty, cure AIDS, and bring about world piece as soon as Jersey Shore is off.

Anyway, let me know what you think. Please don't point out misspellings as it is very difficult to type with my hands behind my back in this white shirt.