MovieChat Forums > The Five-Year Engagement (2012) Discussion > Stupid question, but why didn't they...

Stupid question, but why didn't they...


...just go their separate ways from the beginning while still being engaged? Tom
would have been able to keep his job and Violet would've have been able to pursue her career. Why not just be in a long distance relationship and make it work that way while visiting each other periodically, like say every other weekend or something?

What would you have done in the scenario?


I've never fooled anyone. I've let people fool themselves.

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I would've gone with my partner
Marriage involves compromise and sacrifice and I couldn't marry someone who wasn't supportive like this

Do guys like "the thing"?
They like it better than no thing.

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Because that would be another movie. I think it was called Going the Distance.



I'm so ugly...that's ok 'cause so are you.

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Who the hell wants a long distance relationship for 2 years? Those never work.

Don't tell me you know someone and it did. They don't.

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Did for me.

Two years long-distance (with frequent visits of increasing duration), then lived together for a year, married five years next month.

You bitch! May all your souffles henceforth be dense and heavy!
- the_mighty_armadillo

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Sorry I would be too horny to be faithful in a long distance relationship

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crude but absolutely spot on.

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so you are supposed to spend your entire life with your significant other,

But you cannot keep it in your pants for 2 years? I kinda feel sorry for whoever marries you. I mean, what if you get married and your wife gets sick and cannot be with you for a year? just cheat on her?
that's pretty grim. I hope you are not thinking about getting married anytime soon.

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*beep* I was long distance with my boyfriend for the first two years of our relationship. We've been together 13 years now and we're married.

If you love someone, you can wait for them.

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Having that much time and space away from each other would've run the risk of diluting it. Maybe even ending it.

They would be exposed to people every day and would get attention from them face to face, either at work or school or when hanging out with friends. No matter how much they love each other initially, they could start forming bonds with those people and subsitute it.

It's not totally impossible, as one of the above posters mentioned, but I'm sure for a vast majority of people it would be difficult. Almost impossible. And that's with sex not being factored in.

Closeness is important. With just an occasional phone call, it' really just be a pen pal relationship. Talking about what you did during your day isn't easy - sometimes nothing happens and there's nothing to talk about, lol - if you were there together talking about your 'nothin' day, you could lean against them or offer a hand on their shoulder; a cuddle session. Offer them some kind of physical sign you're there with them.

Long distance is incredibly hard. Also, call me crazy, but I like the idea of actually seeing someone I love and 'not' having them be thousands of miles away.

Her being in school, she wouldn't be able to fly off whenever except on maybe holidays. And he has a job where he played a significant part - his schedule isn't that flexible.

They loved each other and were engaged. The only way forward is together, not apart.

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Technically that would be the rational thing to do for both parties.
But, the first thing is that everyone always says long distance relationships don't work. For some reason people cannot be away from the person they are "supposed to share their lives with" for more than a couple of days because they will just find someone else. (This makes no sense but, whatever)

Also, they probably just wanted to be with each other, they loved so much they did not want to be away, he probably wanted to spend every day by her side, eating together, sleeping together, etc.
They probably thought "love conquers all" he was probably being romantic and understanding, while not thinking at all about himself or his life.

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Keep in mind that for story purposes, the audience is generally rooting for the couple to be together in a physical, sharing-a-life-together sense. Would "Rocky" have been just as dramatic with Adrian cheering Rocky on via a long-distance call in that climactic bout, rather than watching from ringside? See my point?

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