MovieChat Forums > The Five-Year Engagement (2012) Discussion > Why, exactly, could they not get married...

Why, exactly, could they not get married?

posted 10 years ago by Leesha92
7 replies | jump to latest

Why couldn't Tom and Violet get married? I mean really, it's not like they were strapped for cash or their careers were just getting established and they didn't know were they would end up.

Tom was a chef, and yes the town they moved to was a quiet one and their wasn't any five-star restuarants like he was used to working in. But he could still get a job at a nice restuarant in town, it was HIM that didn't want the pay cut and it was kinda his fault that he was reduced to working in a sandwich shop-he didn't take the pay offers when he walked into the restuarants.

And it's not like Violet was an undergrad who had no idea where her life would lead. She was a post-doc, and those things last a decent 5 years, longer if your supervisor likes your research (which in the movie he did). She was getting paid too, so it's not like she had to work at McDonalds casually to get through her bachelor's degree.

From the sounds of things, both knew if Violet didn't get her post-doc offer in California they would have to move, so when she got her post-doc offer to another state they both knew it was coming. I just don't get why they couldn't get married. There was nothing stopping them.

[–] veil182 10 years ago

Moving to a complete new place, finding a new job/beginning a doctoral(?) program, and planning a wedding/getting married are all huge, time consuming moves. Tough to do them all at once.

Once they've settled down in Michigan..well a bunch of other stuff happens

[–] Leesha92 10 years ago

I can understand at the beginning it would have been tough, I agree. I understand why, when they first moved, to delay the wedding for a few months to get settled into their new home and find their feet in brand new state. But after a while it was getting ridiculous. There was no reason to delay the wedding any longer after a year, especially when it became evident Violet was doing so well in her post-doc research that she was staying at the university for another few years.

I actually think Violet was just making excuses for not getting married. I felt for Tom being put 2nd, especially when they both made the commitment to get married and delayed the wedding like three times.

[–] sakutf 9 years ago

In reality, Ann Arbor is not a quiet town and there are a lot of fantastic restaurants. There is a massive and diverse student body and one of the foremost research hospitals in the country. The sandwich shop he worked at is a real place and has made Food and Wine magazine.

[–] Leesha92 9 years ago

lol thanks for the cultural lesson, and just like how I'm sure in reality Ireland isn't all just sprawling green meadows and rainbows I'm sure in reality Ann Arbor is a bustling hub with amazing restaurants and people.
But this isn't reality, this is a fictional movie that has dramatised the location for the purposes of its narrative. I'm talking about the fictional movie lol even if Tom was working at the fryers of a Burger King, there was no reason why they couldn't get married after the first year or so of being in a new place.

[–] labamagal 9 years ago

I agree. True, they probably wouldn't haves had the 'wedding of their dreams', but if the end result is about spending your lives today and being legally wed, then go to the courthouse and make it legal. Have a huge wedding and honeymoon later. These are full-fledged adults and once you're well-established in your career, planing a huge wedding cross-country just doesn't seem practical...at least not in their case.

[–] 9 years ago

[deleted]

[–] spookyrat1 8 years ago

Why couldn't Tom and Violet get married?

That's the thing. You can't help asking yourself that question and there wasn't anything really stopping them.🐭