what illness did she have?

I think that after her father left, her mother snapped. I don't know if she was mental before that, but I definitely know that had something to do with it. She probably knew deep down that Lily was all she had left, and that if Lily left her, that she would be all alone and feel like she did when her husband left her. My question is though, if she felt so lonely, why didn't she try to find a boyfriend or something, unless she was afraid of being hurt again.

'That was the day I died and someone else was saved' ~ Sleeping With The Enemy

iT'S CALLED PARANOIA!!!!

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A case of the crazies.

Lily's mother had the classic symptoms of Borderline Personality Disorder, which include fear of abandonment, splitting (aka black and white thinking), manipulation, and self-injurious behavior.

i'm not a doctor or a behavioral health professional but my guess would be a personality disorder along with an anxiety disorder. "crazy" is judgmental. it's actually sad. oh and the paranoia and obsessive compulsions also lie in between those two disorders somewhere, they're very consistent with those diagnosis'

i'm so freaking glamorous i spit glitter

As someone who has a mental health background and has a mother like this but not quite as extreme, I'd say maybe her mom was co-dependent in addition, possessing abandonment issues. My mom has these issues but doesn't possess Borderline Personality Disorder as this mother does.

My father passed away of cancer when I was a teenager and I never realized how co-dependent my mom was until he passed away. Like this mom, she didn't want me to move out and would guilt trip me when I talked about it. I was in my late 20s when I moved out of my mom's house. Having a parent like this is difficult and simple decisions in life such as moving out, taking a job out of state can be painful. Only those who have experienced this can understand. It goes well beyond just being assertive.

A side note here..........My American friends thought I was weird for being at home at such a late age, however my friends that came from collective cultures, like my Asian and African friends thought it was wonderful that I would give up so much of myself to stay with her at such a late age since my father had passed away. For this reason, I almost exclusively had all foreign friends because I wasn't seen as an anomaly.

I am proud of her because while she still displays co-dependency tendencies, she is a lot stronger than she used to be. I even took a job out of state for 5 years and she handled it very well.