Textbook definition of contrivance: this movie


That explains the first 23 minutes of NIGHT AT THE MUSEUM 2 to the letter (not to mention much of what follows), one of the most galling examples of the lazy overuse of contrivance I've seen in years in a major studio tentpole motion picture. Throughout film history, many, many screenwriters and directors have employed contrivance, coincidence and even misdirection to kickstart the plot or keep it rolling once it's running, but rarely have I seen them throw literally one contrived moment after another at an audience for 23 minutes straight and expect their audience to just roll with it. Ben's a millionaire now! The old museum is replacing the exhibits with faulty holograms! (by the way, is the "hologram" Teddy Roosevelt performed by the "exhibit-come-to-life" Teddy Roosevelt, or by an actor hired to portray the hologram? 'Cause he sure looks a LOT like the exhibit-come-to-life, which should make no sense, especially from Ricky Gervais' point of view). Ben's son's a computer ace who's happy to share dad with co-workers AND back him up on an instantaneous "zany" mission using what appears to be Google Earth! Where's Carla Gugino? Who cares! The Smithsonian employs idiots as both tour guides and security guards! Yeah, right. And that dreadful Stiller-Hill neo-vaudeville routine, just to acquire a security pass that proves mostly unnecessary in light of how easy it is for Stiller and various other characters and beasts to roam freely around MANY virtually abandoned Smithsonian buildings with unlocked doors at night! (watch closely -- he rarely uses it) I could go on. Are the kids that this film was designed for really so callow as to fall for this? Sweet feathery Christ but this was insulting! Special effects? Pacing? Cinematography? I'll give it those, and Hank Azaria was fun, but this shocking level of contrivance -- not to mention the over-reliance on smarmy observational "exchanges" in lieu of actual dialogue -- is just painful to process, and I'll never understand how Hollywood filmmakers can be so lazy, and so abusive of the goodwill engendered by a preceeding film -- wait a minute, yes I can: money, and lots of it! A small amount of contrivance is understandable, but this movie is off the charts!

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NO ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT NO ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT ONE LIKES READING A WALL OF TEXT...paragraphs are our friends...




"Stick with me baby, and you'll be fartin' thru silk."

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People who can read don't mind at all. People with the attention span of gnats can't handle it.

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People who can read don't mind at all. People with the attention span of gnats can't handle it.


Or folks like myself who have eye problems. ☺

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I completely agree with you 100%.

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Many thanks! ;)

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