MovieChat Forums > Desert Flower (2009) Discussion > If you had to circumsize your daughter

If you had to circumsize your daughter


If you lived in a country where FGM is sad reality and you'd have to do it to your own daughter, what age would you find the most proper for the surgery?

According to Waris' books, it's being done to little girls and her teenage sister was described as being already much older than an average girl undergoing this surgery.

I believe babyhood would be the best choice in this respect because:

a) The girl doesn't have any memories of this, unlike when it is done later.

b) Even if the girl died as a result of the surgery, it would be a bit easier to stand for her parents because when your child dies in babyhood, you didn't have time to develop ties of attachment to this extent as in the case of an older child and you didn't invest so much money and time devoted to your child, so your loss isn't so heavy as it would be a couple of years later.

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I think that if one lived in a country where FGM was normal and you didn't know any other way you would probably just do it whenever anyone else was doing it

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Really? Having an infant die because of something you did to it would be easy to take and not hard to move on from? I don't think any age is a good age, but maybe until the daughter is old enough to decide for herself if she wants her body mutilated would be 'best'.


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If you lived in a country where FGM is sad reality and you'd have to do it to your own daughter, what age would you find the most proper for the surgery?
What kind of twisted thought experiment is that?

Nobody has to do it. It isn't like women are required to present their genitals in order to go about their daily lives in places like that. In fact, quite the opposite with them frequently being required to keep as much skin covered up as possible.

I would just skip it and say we did it instead.

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I think as young as possible.

The thought of doing such is amazingly horrendous , but , if you know no better ..... there is no excuse to mutilate anybody whether male or female no matter what the reason.

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The regularly done male circumcision comes to mind... There is no excuse you say? As far as I know, it's fairly common in a lot of countries nowadays to mutilate little boys, the US included.

and to the OP: What a freakish question is that, anyway? If you HAD to? Let's hope WE never have to make any such horrible decision...

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[deleted]

and I'm fine with my mutilated vulva, does that mean it's right to mutilate babies? no.

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You shouldn't be mate, my father has been circumcised fairly late in his life and he told me that since the procedure his sex life sucks big time. Basically during the OP the most sensitive part of his penis has been removed plus the whole "mechanics" of a sexual intercourse changes, making the whole act less pleasurable than it used to be.

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Not quite true. I was circumcised as an infant in the US, and I have always hated it. Many other men do too, in fact there is a strong and growing movement against the practice for this reason.

Surveys have found that about a third of men circumcised as infants in the US wish it had not been done. There is also an international support group with chapters across the world for them. www.NORM.org

to those who claim female cutting is totally different because it's worse, or meant to control women: not always true. there are various forms of it practiced in different cultures, some remove the clitoris, some remove labia, some sew together labia, and some remove only the clitoral hood, which by the way, is the same body part as the male's foreskin; they develop from the same tissue in the womb, and are in fact the same tissue type. one covers the glans penis, the other covers the glans clitoris.

so removal of the clitoral hood (the prepuce) is the most exact equivalent of male circumcision. Yet today, removal of the girl's prepuce is illegal unless she is a consenting adult, while in America and Muslim nations, a man's prepuce is commonly cut off when he is an infant, without necessity, never giving him a chance to say no.

there are various justifications given by supporters of both male and female cutting, that are often the same; it's easier to clean, smells better, it's considered more attractive or normal in that culture, they might get made fun of by other kids if it isn't done, it's only a little bit, etc.

pOint is, no one has any right to cut off someone else's body parts without his or her consent, unless in the rare case of necessity (a rotten tooth, appendicitis, fixing a birth defect, etc.)

Buffy>Angel>j00

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Great post.

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The same question should be asked about our sons.

Circumcision in all forms, male or female, is barbaric (barring medical circumstances. Real ones, not bulls*** "it's easier to clean" nonsense. If you cut off a part of your sons penis so he doesn't have to take an extra 10 seconds in the shower, you don't deserve to have a child). The only reason Western society doesn't care about the brutality of male circumcision is because it's so popular that people just turn a blind eye to the mutilation of their child because that's what's normal.

Controversial comment is a go.




I still believe that peace and plenty and happiness can be worked out some way. I am a fool.

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The difference in female and male circumcision is that the female loses all the pleasure she could have during sex, when a man doesn't. The women a mutilated so they won't enjoy sex because them enjoying sex obviously means they're whores.

planes crash., and apparantly clowns kill.

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The difference in female and male circumcision is that the female loses all the pleasure she could have during sex, when a man doesn't. The women a mutilated so they won't enjoy sex because them enjoying sex obviously means they're whores.


This right here.

Look, as much as I want to respect other people's cultures and traditions, FGM is simply a practice used to control women.

What if women decided that, because men have such rabid sexual appetites, they had to wear one of these http://www.bondagechamber.co.uk/p6-Spiked-Male-Chastity-Belt.html until they were married?

And male circumcision itself may have religious connections but in the past it was mostly used to discourage men from masturbating (unsuccessfully, I might add).

FGM has absolutely no logical or practical purpose except to control women. There's not even a remote way to justify it.

Don't try to cash in love, that check will always bounce.

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"Had to" circumcise my daughter? I can't even imagine living in such a world; I'd escape it. That's the only way I can answer this question.

~~~~~~~
Think cynical thoughts.

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NO AGE!! It's a disgusting thing to do to ANY child at ANY age!!!!

"The girls doesn't have memories of this, unlike when done later????" Obviously you're not speaking from experience. How do you know how old someone is before they remember something so painful and traumatic?? I know people who remember pain as young as 12 months old. Nobody should be put through this torture at any age and anyone who performs it and/or condones it, does not have a caring heart!!

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The thing is it's not the act in itself but the scarring, physical and emotional that is associated with it later that is the problem. If it was done on infants under anesthesia, it would remain a barbaric and horrific mutilation.

And to anyone daring to equate male and female circumcision, shame on you. Whatever arguments you can have about male circumcision, I'm not arguing with them, it cannot compare to the pain and trauma suffered by those women.
If boys had their penis cut off and the remaining tissues sawn up, then we could talk. Don't lessen these women's experience by making it political.

For every lie I unlearn I learn something new - Ani Difranco

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Unless you are stitching up the hole in the penis, male circumsision doesn't compare to the female circumsision practices.

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Yeah I can't believe anyone would even try to compare the two

female mutilation - remove all sexual pleasure and control her.
male circumsition - keeps the penis clean and any pleasure remains the same.

(•_•)

can't outrun your own shadow

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Why is ignorance so bliss? In america men are forced to have their genitals mutilated and women are allowed genital integrity. In other countries men aren't just mutilated but they are also castrated and forced into prostitution.

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do you even know what entails mutilation? removing a little layer of foreskin isn't mutilation. In what barbaric country are men castrated and forced into prostitution because women all over the world are forced into prostitution everyday.

(•_•)

can't outrun your own shadow

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Well if you actually looked up information on castration, you would no, but i'm not gonna waste my time with you, because in america you're allowed to be stupid. The foreskin scientifically is the same as the clitoris, they both have nerves that effect human sexuality. Many men in america complain about problems because of their circumcision at birth. Women and men in america think its funny to castrate a man.

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You sound like another idiotic, biased, American-hater - how so typical and you're too blind to realize that I'm not even American. Do you even know what castration is? WHO IN THE US CASTRATES THEIR MEN, THEIR CHILDREN??? I don't know of anyone. Maybe some zealots where YOU come from. In the US it's extremely uncommon to castrate men or women. Do no confuse circumcision and castration. My brother was circumcized at 2, my dad was as well but don't know at what age, my husband and his brothers have been circumcised (ALL my male friends have been circumsized), and NONE of them have EVER complained of any problems in their genital areas due to it.

PS. No, you don't have to waste your time by wasting my time...

(•_•)

can't outrun your own shadow

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Some women who were circumcised as babies, have said their genitals was still functional, but that doesn't make circumcision right. The genitals maybe fuctional, but its not as functional as it would be with the foreskin or clitoris hood. There are different forms of genital mutilations against women some are severe like in this film, and some are not.

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My brother was circumcized at 2, my dad was as well but don't know at what age, my husband and his brothers have been circumcised (ALL my male friends have been circumsized), and NONE of them have EVER complained of any problems in their genital areas due to it.


Wonderful anecdotes! You expect your brother to complain to you about his penile dysfunctions?

The effects of male circumcision on sensitivity go from no loss in sensitivity to total loss in sensitivity. Americans have a lot more penile dysfunction issues than Europeans do and the cause is obvious.

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Why is ignorance so bliss? In america men are forced to have their genitals mutilated and women are allowed genital integrity. In other countries men aren't just mutilated but they are also castrated and forced into prostitution


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So- you think ignorance is bliss? Then you must be the most blissful person in your country! The absurdity is laughable. Answer this- how can these men who were mutilated and castrated be forced into prostitution when they no longer are capable of having an erection? Oh yeah, what 'other countries' is this taking place?

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So- you think ignorance is bliss? Then you must be the most blissful person in your country! oceena your proof that ignorance is bliss.
The absurdity is laughable. Yes you are very laughable .
Answer this- how can these men who were mutilated and castrated be forced into prostitution when they no longer are capable of having an erection? Oh yeah, what 'other countries' is this taking place? Ever heard of sodomy," no I did not think you did. Oh yeah, look up castration on wikipedia, then you'll know what country.

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Poor PhenomenalDiva- You're a confused girl and need to have a talk with your mother about these issues.

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I don't believe in ANY circumcision: male or female. I would never do that to my son or daughter. For the average male, it's not medically necessary and it is never warranted for the female.

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Don't mind if I do!!!

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To the moral idiot who wants me to choose at what age I would be less likely to have bonded with my daughter so that I wouldn't feel bad when she died. (you must be a teen,or a male) I can only say-
Are you fuc king nuts? And for the Dive a Twit holding all men's genitalia (lol) holy may I introduce you to whining and complaining male from -down through the ages.

You girls-I assume you are teens-because you appear ardent and yet soooo naive. (Should I pump my fist now and scream"black power?") The "man" took your power away and cut off your itty bitty foreskin.
That's a covenant between G-d. Pain as an adult. In a hospital under sterile conditions,it involves 5 minutes, a local,petroleum jelly,gauze, and a warm water wash with every diaper change. Heals in 3 days. I chose it for my son :
because I'm Jewish
Everyone chose it
The Dr. recommended the child follow whatever the father was.
Girls-if your BF says he has no feeling and he's a victim of male mutilation-you are a victim of The man-him. He wants a blow job. It's been going around for the last 10-20 years.
Oh poor me-I'm a victim. Bull. I'm a 61 year old woman here to tell you you're being scammed.
I have never seen a man who wasn't circumcised. I was born in 1951. I have never seen any guy gay or straight,who wasn't horny from high school on. Are you telling me they put something new in the water? Take the i-phone away. Shut off the TV. Because I guarantee you-you are blaming the wrong hardware.
It's not the knife the used on his birthday. It's his eyes glued to the screen or his lying mouth.
Or maybe-just maybe-it's you. Then find somebody else.Does Anthony Mackie look like he has a problem?

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