Ok, I start and you follow it! =)
1. All robots are filled with some green slime
2. Surrogates have to be charged overnight every day
3. It´s the future, yet we still use flash drives, USB, and LCD screens
4. 2/3 of the world earn less that 1 USD a day, yet 98% of mankind can afford one Surrogate
5. and having almost 7.000.000.000 surrogates charging does not produce a power grid collapse
6. If you find someone doing drungs in your house, kick him in the face!
share7. if you get your brain melted, it will drip out from your nose and ears.
share8. It is much more harder to walk in public without your surrogate
share9. Although there are 7 billion people connected worldwide Tom saved "about 1 billion lives"
Do what you want with a man but do not *beep* with his Cadillac
your wife will not listen you no matter what about spending time together without the surrogates
your wife will be more of a bitch and think your embarassing her when you kick and punch some guy who was trying to get her to do drugs.
people will laugh when your kicking and punching a surrogate
you will get beat up for trying to talk to Ving rahmes
I KNOW 2 things that are clear.I'm a great sinner,Christ is a great Savior.
Deep down inside, dorky white guys in lab coats want to be black.
In a utopian society, married couples sleep in separate Rooms.
You can turn off every surrogate on the planet simultaneously, and there wont be a single human casualty.
In the future, you can custom build an exact replica surrogate in less than an hour.
grrr arg h4x0r 7Eh pl4NE7share
You can turn off every surrogate on the planet simultaneously, and there wont be a single human casualty.movie never said that, duh share
I think you've missed the point of this game.
grrr arg h4x0r 7Eh pl4NE7share
if you think that it's about pointing out things that were NOT in the movie (and besides are NOT funny), then you missed the point of the game.
share[deleted]
so what? movie never said noone gut hurt or killed (besideds, jets would have been filled with surrogates only, thus no human casualties). Only because it was not SHOWN doesn't mean it didn't happen! Or do you think Luke Skywalker never went for little Jedis just because his penis isn't filmed urinating?? geez!
share[deleted]
gotcha?? my ass, loser! (and even that you didn't get:)
99.95 percent of Earth's surface is uninhabited
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/3/3a/Landusepiechart.png
but good luck with your jets crashing into homes, genius!
And the best thing of all is, the movie did NOT EVEN SAY noone got hurt or killed (because you need everything repeated and spellt out twice apparently ... and still understand none of it).
Actually, I love the "100 things I've learned" threads, they are probably the best thing on IMDB. And ALL of them are hilarious ...
... except your postings here, which are not the least bit funny. Not in the slightest. Nada. Niente. Rien. Nothing. How many translations do you need? Not funny, okay?
"You can turn off every surrogate on the planet simultaneously, and there wont be a single human casualty."
"Sucide rates would not climb after people are cut off from their surrogates."
ha ha, what's funny about that?
And I would have even given you a pass on not being funny, but trying to be funny and mocking the movie by shamefully picking on things that are NOT EVEN IN THE MOVIE, that's a bit too much. And as if that alone was not embarrassing enough, you guys top your own embarrassment after being called out by desperately continuing to sell your pitiful attempts of humour by way of bending the truth and making the film say things it didn't say, not even remotely.
Accept it,
you fail on both levels: truth AND fun !
Now go home and learn how to write these 100-things-I-learned threads, because there ARE very good ones. Actually all the rest are ...
[deleted]
Noone is not a word.
I don't love her.. She kicked me in the face!!
"You can turn off every surrogate on the planet simultaneously, and there wont be a single human casualty."
"movie never said that, duh."
Yes it did, in the epilogue/voice over from the newscaster right at the end.
What it said exactly, was "no reports of human casualties". This does not mean, there haven't been any, just that no such reports are in yet. The announcement came shortly after the incident. Imagine such an event on a worldwide scale. You won't know everything that happened everywhere on the planet during the first couple of hours of general confusion, most possibly not even weeks later.
shareYes they did, the anchorman said There wasn't a single human casualty .
shareBig titted surrogates actually have man boobs!
shareEveryone will own a surrogate that encompasses all of their ideal characteristics and desires, but cheapo models are still available at Radio Shack
If you are not using a surrogate you will be referred to by the derogatory term meatbag, even though everyone is a meatbag at home
No one can afford a backup surrogate, aside from the inventor
People who choose not to use a surrogate will have to live at the dump, where laws and hygiene don't apply
No one wants an Asian surrogate
No one has branded surrogates. (No glowing Apple logos on the forehead? Thank god)
Some people log into their surrogates, go to a club, wait in line to get in.
Realistic face rubber can be easily peeled away at any time
"Jacking" can get you high through your surrogate, but everyone is surprised that a weapon could kill you through your surrogate.
shareWhenever you are scared, emotional, or about to die, all you have to do is unplug.
Nobody thinks this is rude.
#40 (i think):
Surrogates for children doesn't spark pedophile worries in the society. Or reverse pedophile worries.
#41:
Crime has been eradicated by buffering criminals during a crime. Apparently attempted rape is no longer a crime, and neither is vandalism of a surrogate. Meatbags have also apparently never done anything wrong despite being violent revolutionaries.
#42:
when you can run like a car, you will still drive one. When you can jump several stories you will still take stairs and elevators.
#43:
miltary surrogates will be exactly as destructible as civilian ones, they will just look more like crash test dummies.
#44:
Whenever there is a film about robots taking over our way of life, THAT guy will always be the inventor, and the secret undoer.
#45:
Surrogates don't require their clothes to be washed.
#46:
When consciousness can be controlled and transferred into a machine body, nobody will try to make this a permanent thing despite spending 18 hours a day in the machine already.
#47:
You can't patch your surrogate to be immune to the weapon that was too powerful. They didn't think it would bypass the safeguards but it did, so they just scrapped the idea completely.
I have a 1 hour posting quota for posting a link to (great) tits. OK? So don't do that!
48. If all people had to do was stay at home and control their surrogates, nobody would shave, shower, get out of their pajamas or leave the house.
49. Your wife's surrogate doesn't like the meatbag version of you.
50. If you try and pull a fast one, your son will probably end up dead.
[deleted]
#54 - If you brain is partially liquified, don't worry you will survive and make a full recovery within a few days because your brain can regenerate.
#55 - We should kill James Cromwell before he gets invents a robot that threatens mankind
#56 - Within hours of all surrogates being shut down, television networks will have trained/hired/rallied staff to resume coverage.
#57 - Check IMDB before renting a movie in the future
Some of the best from another thread:
#58 - If the military, while developing a secret weapon, accidentally develops an EVEN MORE POWERFUL weapon... they will immediately attempt to destroy all trace of it. --- by SvenViking
#59 - Buy stock in American cars - apparently they will still be driving the same models in 100 years! ---By klown013
#60 - Always kill yourself moments before your master plan concludes. That way you can just assume everything will go as planned. --- By adamgha
#61 - If your company has become the most powerful in the world, making unimaginable profits from producing extremely expensive products EVERYONE wants - make sure to allocate billions of those profits to research weaponry that can destroy those products --- By admin-441
#61. if you lay completely still for most of the day and night, you will not gain weight, need to eat or lose muscle tone.
share#62. When almost everyone in the world is lying down in their homes unable to know who's around them, meaning anyone can walk into their houses, crime rates still manage to plummet.
share63. Even though Anime Fantasy MMORPG games, and Science Fiction characters would be very popular to nerds and geeks, nobody will create a Surrogate based on that plan.
64. No longer with people that was born in the wrong sex have to pay for expensive and risky surgery they can be any gender they want, as well as being fully accepted by others as being that gender.
65. Police officers surrogates are easy enough to hack into, as a result they can access any private or secure information just by using the surrogates. No need to add extra security to make sure the person accessing the information is the correct person.
66. Even though all surrogates are supposed to be coded to the individual and not shared, you can still pick up type of surrogate from the local store.
67. It is illegal to hack into someone else surrogate to prevent them from raping someone, but its okay for surrogates to rape other surrogates.
68. Its funny when a disgruntle husband that happens to be a police officer just starts beating up and destroying your Surrogate even though it would cost you to repair it, as well as the police officer could track you down in person.
69. Its funny to watch this guy beat up someone else's Surrogate even though he may turn on you next.
70. When you think that your police officer husband is still in the hospital after almost being killed, its okay for you to invite friends over to do drugs.
71. When you find out that your husband is out of the hospital but really not doing well you go back to your friends, sit next to a guy that is all over you and do drugs. Even though the husband is still in the house.
72. Be careful of trusting the leader of a freedom movement that is against surrogates, he may end up being one himself.
73. If you go to an area that has a sign no robots, make sure you don't have any metal on you or they may mistake you for one.
74. It's okay for police officers to be shot down and killed or machines damaged if in the robot free zones, because they was asking for it by being in the area.
A man can change his stars
"72. Be careful of trusting the leader of a freedom movement that is against surrogates, he may end up being one himself.
73. If you go to an area that has a sign no robots, make sure you don't have any metal on you or they may mistake you for one."
Corrollary to these:
72.5. If you are the leader of the anti-surrogate movement and yet are secretly a surrogate, you can walk from the robot-dominated area into the no-robot area without going through the same robot-detection security at the gates. (Even though the meatbags, not knowing their leader was a surrogate, would still have interest in ensuring that no impostor surrogate came masked as their leader or other key figure.)
(I'm assuming that the Prophet would have to go outside the no-robot area to charge, unless he had some charger hidden very well somewhere in the no-robot zone.)
"74. It's okay for police officers to be shot down and killed or machines damaged if in the robot free zones, because they was asking for it by being in the area."
Now for this, I assumed that the no-robot zones were like quasi-independent states (although probably more comparable to the "black homeland" ghetto/"nations" created by South Africa within its territory, in the latter days of apartheid), and that by treaty or joint agreement surrogates were forbidden, cops from the surrogate world had no jurisdiction, and indeed that surrogate cops could be lawfully shot on sight for violation of that first law. (Cops from the outside wearing their "meatbag suit" would be a different story probably, since killing an actual human is regarded in both worlds as murder, whereas destroying a surrogate is considered "vandalism" or something like that.)
75. Former owners of mega corporations cannot afford dental hygiene products.
(seriously, have you seen Canter's teeth? so gross!)
...
Double Jeopardy, that's twice as dangerous!
76. Surrogates have been around so long that people can't live without them and hate going outside, yet there are new children being born.
77. Human society would enter History Channel's Life After People within a couple hours of unplugging when people discover their muscle memory and motor skills suck.
78. Surprisingly people went outside shortly after their surrogates shut down instead of waiting for the server to come back up (you Warcraft fans know what I mean).
79. In Minority Report the police could arrest you for crimes you might commit and invade your home without a warrant. In Surrogates, the police can watch everything and almost literally turn your life off with the push of a button.
80. As usual, the future sucks.
share80) James Cromwell invents robots and dies in all of his futuristic robot movies. (I, Robot, Surrogate)..
share81. James Cromwell always has a falling out with the company that helps him invent his robots in all of his futuristic robot movies.
82. When James Cromwell, or anyone in a movie takes a cyanide pill, the director rushes in for a close-up..