A Reflection of True Life

At Christmastime and all through the year, many fathers don't pay child support. They feel as if they're giving their ex-wives money and don't want to do it. Child Support Court often waffles back and forth, changing the court order to suit what the father wants to do instead of what he needs to do in order to feed, house and cloth his children. He sees himself as being single again and reverts back to his adolescent mentality, if he ever grew out of it. He switches jobs as often as he likes when he becomes bored, chooses to try something new or loses his job due to a poor work ethic. When a new job doesn't pay as much as a previous job, the father goes back to Support Court to have his child support reduced, claiming that he doesn't make enough money to pay the amount ordered by the court. Oftentimes, the father won't notify Child Support Services of his new employer so that his child support payment is held back for several months. The mother bears a minimum of 75% of the monetary burden, 95% of the child-rearing responsibility, and 100% of tracking down her husband's new employer and child support payments. It's not uncommon to spend several years in Child Support Court, attending court several times a month in order to obtain child support payments from dead-beat dads. Dead-beat dads outnumber fathers who pay their child support on time or at all by 6 to 1.

If your ex-husband remarries, it's his new wife's children or his new children who will have a nice Christmas even when he's given full visitational rights with your children while not paying child support.

I spent approximately six years in Child Support Court and had to attend at least three times a month, and I tell you that the above is the norm. I saw it all and it's a nightmare! It was ALWAYS THE MOTHERS AND CHILDREN WHO SUFFEED AND DID WITHOUT.

As I've advised my daugher, I advise all women to start a savings account when they are married. The account should be secret from your husband. If you wind up getting a divorce, you will have a small sum put aside to hold you over while waiting for child support checks and for your children to grow old enough so that you no longer need to support them. If you don't get divorced (lucky you!), you and your husband can take a prolonged trip when you retire or have a nice-sized nest egg to fall back on. Don't be skimpy with what you save. Your ex-husband will be doubly skimpy when he decides that he doesn't want to give you child support for your children. The account is traceable so you need to be creative when you open it or you will have to share what you saved with your childrens' dead beat dad.