Portal vs My poop - full analysis
It stunk up the joint, I mean it really did....of course by now you all know that I am referring to portal, the latest reason to support a global ban on all movies released after 1999, courtesy of Geoffrey "why does everybody tell me to kill myself" Schaaf.
There is a scene, where dead worms and blood ooze out of a woman's organs and she falls face first into said pile....quite unneccesary and extremely uninteresting, but then again, so was the storyline and the entire cast. Being a man, I don't know exactly how this act would feel, although I'm sure it could be compared to spending $5 to watch "portal" by geoffrey schaaf.
Onto my poopie. I delayed this until after the movie, a bad decision. Had it been during, I would have at least flushed away a poopie and 90-95 minutes of my life, rather than flush away a full 100 minutes. In order to poop, I had to pull my pants down (but not bend over as you do when paying to watch portal, by geoffrey schaaf).
Pooping requires the same amount of effort as directing or starring in "portal" by geoffrey schaaf (come on google.) The acting is bad, I mean it's really bad, although not as bad as the storyline, "plot", camera work, or the characters. It's scary to think that these actors were paid, or even that they are actors, or indeed, that the world is not about to end. At least the blonde witch has a weird nose, so she may have another shot in the horror movie genre. Awful acting all round.
"Portal" by Geoffrey Schaaf is terrible -10/10, 0/10 on IMDb. If you ever feel like watching this, DO NOT. DONTBUYTHISMOVIE and DONTWATCTHISMOVIE.
f.molai, charming man on gardening leave.