Her daughter is horrible

Yes...awful relationship, but it doesn't sound like it was the daughter's fault. Her mother was distant and uncommunicative, sent her to live with relatives, then married a man that sexually abused her (the daughter.) So, you can imagine this didn't lead to much trust or bonding.

As to the ashes...not everyone is sentimental in that way. I imagine she planned to scatter the ashes, and didn't need an urn to do that.

(I don't mean to imply it's Patricia Douglas' fault she didn't have a close relationship with her daughter, either. Obviously the events discussed in the film left her closed off from other, including her OWN mother. Family patterns can often repeat themselves.)

I don't think the daughter is horrible! I think she comes across as a very balanced person.

Like cookie said, not everyone is sentimental about what remains after death. Especially given the almost criminally inflated prices funeral homes charge for this crap

I am fairly sure that the daughter was planning on scattering the ashes, even though editing could have made this clearer.

And it really seems that the daughter had a cold relationship with her mother; due to how damaged a woman Pat was. By her own admission frigid and unable to love, after what had happened to her.



"Equitare, arcum tendere,veritatem dicere."

I don't know if I will put my mothers ashes in an urn. I find urns to be morbid. My mother didn't have an urn for her fathers ashes until a decade after he died, and she adored him. They had a good relationship. We're just not big on urns in our family. We scatter the ashes of our dead, and we usually do it in several places. The only reason we still have some of my grandfathers ashes is because they're supposed to be mixed with my grandmothers ashes, and she's still alive and kicking.

Not everyone has the same beliefs about urns that you do. Am I a horrible daughter for not putting my mothers ashes in an urn? Personally, I think my mother wouldn't have been a huge fan of the idea.

So try to turn the judgement down a tad, mkay?




I still believe that peace and plenty and happiness can be worked out some way. I am a fool.