MovieChat Forums > Arranged (2009) Discussion > My comments on this interesting film

My comments on this interesting film

posted 16 years ago by RCeditor
4 replies | jump to latest

The scene with the children asking if the two women should be enemies played out so well. Since the kids weren't "getting it" when Nasira tried to explain to them that she and Rochel were not automatic enemies, Rochel came up with a good lesson plan for them.

I started feeling sorry for Rochel when she was not finding a suitable partner. She was being pressured by her mother and the matchmaker. I wonder what would have happened if Nasira had not intervened? Because she was having problems, Rochel started questioning the traditions, and thinking that perhaps she would have to leave the faith. I started thinking, what if marriage was not for her? She had a choice not to choose a particular man, but could she have chosen not to get married, at least not then? Would her little sister have paid the price for this?

I was happy that Nasira was able to be honest with her father. I think that he was telling her to look past the first man's outward appearance in order to hear what Nasira REALLY thought of the man. How they had nothing in common. The father learned that Nasira was not being shallow, she sincerely did not think that the man was suitable for her.

I could feel Rochel's embarassment at having to ask her friend to leave at her mother's insistence. That must have been part of the reason why she had been considering leaving.

SPOILER AHEAD!!

At the end, when I saw the women sitting on the bench, I was wondering if the two women were still working outside the home. I was glad that they had remained friends.

-The Divine Ms Slim

http://youtube.com/AndreJaxon

[–] segara 16 years ago

Practically speaking, I'm quite sure they were still working. I don't know about Orthodox Jews, but that's the case with the conservative Muslim families I know. It's unrealistic to think that in today's world we can exist comfortably without two working partners. My hijabi friends are going to medical school (their parents work at gas stations and at other small jobs, like Nasira's dad), so obviously education and careers are as important to Muslims as they are to all Asians.

[–] RCeditor 16 years ago

Practically speaking, I'm quite sure they were still working. I don't know about Orthodox Jews, but that's the case with the conservative Muslim families I know. It's unrealistic to think that in today's world we can exist comfortably without two working partners.

Thank you for your response, segara.

I was also thinking about day care costs and expenses. If Mom is earning just enough to pay for day care (and it is EXPENSIVE!), then I wouldn't see the point, other than to get out of the house during the day. Of course, these are all observations from the culture to which I am accustomed. Perhaps the grandmothers or other family members would be expected to watch the babies while the women work.

When the children are older, teaching would be a practical career for the women if they desire to spend time with the children and not use day care. The moms would be out of school around the time that the children are getting out of school for the day.

-The Divine Ms Slim

"I make him an offer he no refuse"

[–] cmeyer38 13 years ago

"It's unrealistic to think that in today's world we can exist comfortably without two working partners."

Whoa, I take exception to that remark. I chose to stay home and raise my five children because that's where a mother belongs. We had a roof over our heads, but it wasn't fancy. We always bought used cars, used clothing, and shopped sales. My children were never in pre-school and rarely went to a baby sitter. In fact, I ended up home schooling my children. All my children are grown now and recently my 26yo son recently told me, "Mom, I am really glad that you and Dad raised us the way you did." What more satisfaction can a Mom ask for? One can exist "comfortably" but not "fancily" on just one income if you try.

[–] smiling-dreidel 14 years ago

U asked
"I wonder what would have happened if Nasira had not intervened?"

In the arranged marriages by orthodox Jews, the boy-girl do have the final say if they want or don't want this match. And although it is true that some "shadchan"'s and/or parents can sometimes pressure the boy-girl to accept their proposal. the final yes or no to accept depends in the boy-girl, so it's not so bad. and if Rochel wouldn't be happy she wouldn't accept the proposal, and can even find other "shadchan" to help he search. (and lower her father's blood pressure :-)

U asked "I was wondering if the two women were still working outside the home"

Orthodox woman are not forbidden to work outside the home. as long as it adheres to her "modesty" rules, many woman have good jobs and when the husbands are scholars who continue to study for rabbinical ordination etc. the woman are the main providers for the family