Ten Things I Have Learned From Watching TEN INCH HERO

1/ It takes 5 staff to man a sandwich shop which has about 2 customers a day.

2/ Any wiccan should have her own meditation theme song which plays every time she enters a scene.

3/ Girls who have been physically abused by an unapologetic boyfriend should take them outside to a dark private corner so they can cop another hiding.

4/ A little girl who kinda looks like the daughter you gave up when you were 15 will be close enough to make you abandon any plan to pursue your real long lost daughter when it turns out you pursued the wrong one.

5/ Dressing as a homeless man and standing there creepily telling a girl over and over she's pretty is a great way to pick up girls.

6/ When two people get married, they should only invite the five staff that work at the sandwich shop, their partners, and two customers from the shop.

7/ A middle aged couple getting married naked is completely normal and doesn't cause the guests any uncomfortableness whatsoever.

8/ Never trust Punks or Surfers, they are hiding secret identities.

9/ Staff making lewd comments to customers or wearing t-shirts bearing aggressive slogans is a great way to drum up business for an already struggling sandwhich shop.

10/ Women who mirror Rebecca DeMornay's behaviour in the first half of 'The Hand That Rocks The Cradle' in pursuit of your child should be welcomed into the family whole heartedly after her lies and deceit are revealed.

NB: I actually really enjoyed this film, but you gotta admit it left it's self waaaaaaaay open to a bit fun being poked at it :P