Things I learned from watching The Pet

1. Punching a cat in the stomach will kill it.
2. Animal pets are buried; human pets are cremated and ashes scattered.
3. Flower girls will do anything for $10,000.00.
4. People from Lichenstein speak with French accents, especially if they were educated in France.
5. A "human pet" will eagerly do cartwheels on the beach and try to rock climb.
6. Andrea Edmondson is hot.
7. Nude people don't shiver in the snow.
8. Wearing a dog collar prevents you from speaking unless you're given permission.
9. Human pets stay in pyramid-shaped cages.
10. Said pyramid-shaped cages makes it difficult to hold one's bladder all night.
11. If you tell someone branding will hurt, don't worry; they won't freak out until you actually go to brand them.
12. Even an extremely hot girl doesn't go for more than $150,000 to $200,000 on the open market.
13. Flower girls sit on the floor and eat ice cream on the first date.