A theory that has been around for about 70 years is called re-enactment. The person that is sexually abused as a child will sometimes unconsciously try to repeat the trauma in order to master it - an attempt to finally be in charge when of course they could not be when they were children. An example, but one on a much, much smaller scale is this. You argue with your boss, and he embarrasses you in front of your co-workers. Soon after the incident you fantasize how you would have wanted the incident to turn out, repeating (re-enacting) your new idea over and over again in your head. Maybe your fantasy is how YOU embarrassed HIM in front of your co-workers - you are now the victor. This example is of course conscious, but it does make you feel like the victor at least for a little while. I stress a little while, because the abuse victim on some level NEVER feels vindicated, so the process repeats itself with new victims.
This of course this does not excuse the perp. But this theory is why a child need to get help right away to avoid this horror. Sadly it is very hard emotionally for a child to report - so much shame involved, and even if she does sometimes the parents are too ashamed to do so and think the problem will all "go away." Ironically the child is revictimized when no one believes her story!!! More often than not the abuser is one the family knows, family member, friend, at least a person in the families life. Often we like to think it is more often a "stranger" who abuses-a mentally safer idea -one would rather not know the abuser. Who wants to think that a person close to the family, a person the family loves can be that evil.
1 in 4 girls are sexually abused in U.S. 1 in 6 boys are. Are those the saddest statistics you have ever read, or what?
"Anyone who tells a lie has not a pure heart, and cannot make a good soup." Ludwig Van Beethoven
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limkmike
12 years ago
the theory actually is that victims/survivors of child sexual abuse are more likely to go on to become abusers if they don't get help... i worked for CARI long enough to know this (www.cari.ie)
statistics conservatively used indicate the two or three children, in every classroom, in every school here in ireland are affected by child sexual abuse... not necessarily abuse victims but maybe friends or related to a victim...
it's also horrifying that groups and therapy centres like CARI get no government funding and will have to close as they cannot give the services needed to those families... on the plus though CARI is the ONLY charity that every cent raised goes directly to families... none of it goes to commission, administration etc
www.bebo.com/journeysendlimerick
De inimico non loquaris sed cogites
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