Did the mother say they beat Gwen for 5 hours??!! Not to sound like a ghoul, but if that was the case how could they even have an open coffin?
There'd be nothing left of that poor child's face! And how could anyone survive being beaten for 5 hours?! Wouldn't that have killed her?
"I'd say this cloud is Cumulo Nimbus."
"Didn't he discover America?"
"Penfold, shush."
They were wanting it closed coffin at first. When the minister said that though I was not really sure if he was thinking about how baly she was battered OR the fact she was laying there as a girl.
And they can do WONDERS with make-up
Question your prejudices.
Perhaps you may have heard of Emmett Till, a young Afican American boy who was murdered in 1955 by two white men, all for apparently wolf whistling at a white woman. The two guys who killed him got off scot free after a trial, even when one of them later admitted to the crime in an interview, which was published in a magazine.
When Emmett was murdered, his face and body were so badly beaten that even his own mother could not recognise him. His face was swollen, his teeth were knocked out, he was, literally, beaten to a pulp.
Now, obviously, many of us would rather have a closed coffin if such a thing happened to one of our relatives, to remember them as we knew them. As long as justice was done, at least.
But justice was not done. And Till's mother and family wanted people to know what happened, and how such a horrific crime had gone unpunished. They specifically said they wanted an open top coffin, to show what had been done to their boy. Many people, once confronted with the horrific image at his funeral, and the photo published in the paper, could not believe it, and some said that it was a mannequin and not real.
Sorry for the history lesson, I have a point, I promise.
So if Gwen/ Eddie's family had wanted an open top coffin, they may have specifically wanted people to know what had happened. It is bad enough to read about the facts in the paper, but when confronted with a picture of the brutally beaten corpse, it is impossible to deny the truth. If people found such a crime unbelievable, then show them a photo, and there is the undeniable proof.
I think if people would learn to call her simply GWEN, it would show a lot more acceptance.
Question your prejudices.
Well, I know they legally had Edward's name changed to Gwen, but Edward/ Gwen had never fully gone through with the sex change procedure. Edward still had all the male genitalia, and more than likely would have fully gone through with the sex change procedure when he turned 18.
But he died male, with all the sexual organs. I know I am gonna be a minority, and likely to get flamed into forum hell for saying this, but when he died, he was Edward. If he had fully gone through with the procedure, I would have called her Gwen.
Nobody should be killed for being different. Yes, these murderers believed Edward/ Gwen to have been born genetically female, but in no way were there actions excusable. Punch a wall, hire a hooker who was female from birth, or just talk trash for a week and get it outta your system. Then move on.
(And if you need to seek therapy, get it).
Well acceptance means we love, accept, support, etc people based on what they are on the INSIDE, not based on sex organs. Mentally, emotionally and psychologically Gwen was a WOMAN, she had the heart, brain and soul of a WOMAN, so she should be refered to as one. Calling her Eddie/Gwen is disrespectful. Her mother, friends and family called her "Gwen" and "she", what she PREFERED to be called, so I don't see why it's so hard for YOU to.
And not everyone has the means to go through with the surgery when they turn 18, some people don't do it until they are 30 or 40 and in 1 case I heard of even 60! but whether she goes through with it or not, she's STILL a girl, all that surgery does is change the outside to match the inside and she still should be treated as, respected as who she is on the inside.
Acceptance is more than just the LEGAL surgery and what's legally on paper or in documents.
I have not gone through with the full surgey yet But my true friends call me by the female name I prefer to be called by! The only people who call me by my male name are my grandparents, and I don't mind when doign it just b/c they're old and it's hard for them to remember, but if anyone else calls me "male name"/"female name" they do NOT get acknowledged, it's just RUDE.
It's like thiese people who say "Oh I accept trans people but HE was still a MAN so that's what I will call HIM!" THat's just idiotic and ignorant.
And it seems it would be easier to just say "Gwen" than "Eddie/Gwen" "him/her" and all that BS. I mean is there some reason you INSIST onputting the "Eddie" part in there, is it to prove a point or something or show us how you feel? I mean we call know the poor girl was born with a penis, so there's really no need to point it out everytime you call her by name.
I mean if you got to know a trans girl as a GIRL and you didn't know she was trans and you were calling her "HER" and "SHE" like you would any normal woman and then you found out she was trans, surely you wouldn't do something as rude as start calling her "him/her".
And what if you didn't know her male name b/c she's always presented herself as a female to you, and you found out she was trans, would you DEMAND to know her male name so you could start calling her by it? Would you go to the hall of records and try to swip her birth certificate to find out her male name, woud you go that far to somehow reconcile it in your mind that you must point out the fact that she's male everytimeyou address her?
Question your prejudices.
When Adam Blaustein was writing for comics, he went by the name Adam. He wrote under that name for quite some time.
When he went through with the procedure fully, then she was Maddie, short for Madeline, and called herself Madeline from then on.
When she died in 2008, she died as Madeline, not Adam.
So I do support people who are transgendered, and I am not trying to be offensive. But Maddie called herself Adam or Addie when she was still physically male. When she had her procedure, she was then female, and called herself such also. When I referred to Gwen as Eddie/ Gwen, I was simply calling on the experiences of Maddie, who I assumed operated just like many other transgendered individuals do, referring to themselves by their gender and given name until having the procedure to assume their new gender.
I was most definitely not trying to offend. If I caused offence to you, I'm sorry.
After watching the film, I saw that Gwen was being referred to by both names,so I assumed that that is what happened. (Some people called him Edward, some called him Gwen, latter half of the film nearly everyone called her Gwen).
No, I would not be so heinous as to track down their birth certificate, and demand to know their real name. Nor would I be so heinous to demand to know their biological name. I am not that cruel, or adamant to know someone's name.
However, to paraphrase Cedric the Entertainer, if someone started referring to themselves under a pseudonym such as D-licious, I would not call them D-licious. I will not, because I am an adult. And in that case I would want to know their actual name, but I would not track down their birth records. If their birth name happened to be Dee Licious, then that is what I will call them, or if they had it legally changed to that name.
I honestly feel Gwen would have gone through with the full procedure had she lived. One can even begin the procedure far younger than Gwen as long as they have full support from their parents (procedures such as hormone therapy, mastectomies, and so forth). Although this may vary from state to state, according to the law.
While people may criticse transgendered individuals, because everyone is an individual, I doubt many people, myself included, would have the courage to go through with such a decision. When I caused offence, I was assuming that every person who is transgendered treats their situation the same. I forgot to think about every person as an individual, and therefore did not heed my own words- Gwen was an individual, like us all, so her situation was different to Maddie Blaustein.
I hope your procedure is successful, and I hope you have complete and total support before and after you have your operation. No matter what one goes through, we need support. Whether it is returning to education, or going through with such an extensive change as you are no doubt planning to do.
"When Adam Blaustein was writing for comics, he went by the name Adam. He wrote under that name for quite some time.
When he went through with the procedure fully, then she was Maddie, short for Madeline, and called herself Madeline from then on.
When she died in 2008, she died as Madeline, not Adam."
I guess different trans people do it different ways, but all the trans people I know want to be called by their female name before they start ANY process, because afterall they are STILL women, just in the wrong body, so most of them don't want a name that reminds them of their birth defect. But I guess it varies. Depending on their agenda I guess.
I know sometimes some people in the movie refered to Gwen as Eddie but it also terribly upset her.
"However, to paraphrase Cedric the Entertainer, if someone started referring to themselves under a pseudonym such as D-licious, I would not call them D-licious."
I think that's totally a different situation, we're talking about gender identity dysphoria here. I'm just waiting for someone to say "So if I want to be called a TREE should everyone start calling me that!?" I think you're intelligent enough to see there's a big difference in something like that and what we're talking about.
The youngest person I've heard of going through with it was 6 years old. The oldest person I've heard of was like 70 something I think. Most people tend to in their 30s or 40s I think.
My father kinda has the attitude that I will be his daughter when I have the surgery and it is LEGAL on paper. I love him but I think that is an absurd attitude. I am STILL the same person as I will be after I have the surgery, so I feel that love and acceptance should go BEYOND just legal documents, I mean my brain, heart and soul are those of a female, so that's how I feel he should see me, since those are the parts that hold emotion, thoughts and feelings.
Question your prejudices.
I am STILL the same person as I will be after I have the surgery
"You won't be though will you? Isn't that sort of the point? You will have changed your gender to what you feel is truly you and your name I'm presuming (unless you have a unisex name already, I have no idea)."
Mentally and psychologically, and emotionally I will ALWAYS be the same person, surgery or no surgery, penis or vagina, I am a FEMALE, my gender is female, just remember gender is between your ears, sex is between your legs. The only thing the surgery does is change my outside to match my brain. SO I can be happy when I look in the mirror. It's really no one's business what I have between my legs AT ALL, unless I'm sexually intimate with that person.
"I'm not trying to be insulting or anything, just asking you to look at it from a parents point of view. I have a son and I cannot comprehend my reaction if he one day said to me he felt he should have been born a girl."
My dad has known about this for over 10 years, so I feel he's had enough time to deal with it. PLUS he knew while I was growing I was not "a boy" But whenever I would exibit typical girl behavior, I was scholded, he should have allowed me to be myself, I've heard of MANY parents who allow their trans children to live as the gender they are inwardly and even give them hormones that surpress puberty, I'm SO GLAD technology has made this available nowdays. So a person can be as accepting as they want to be, it's up to THEM.
And before we get into the whole semantic game, "What is typical girly behavior" I know I know not all girls play with dolls and some girls like to play ball and all that BUT I am gonna say, girls typically are different ffrom boys. There were times I did like to do more boyish things ~like most girls go through that phase, but I still always felt as a girl~
And this is the point I'm trying to get across to ppl, IT"S NOT OUR FAULT! We trans ppl didn't choose to be born this way, WE are the ones who were born conflicted, so IMO it'd ppl's job to accept us and be sensitive to us, not for us to have to tiptoe around them.
And I know it's hard to get used to the idea, but there are things in life that are HARD, as nice as I can say it, but you make a strong effort to accept it, if you're a loving parent.
I know you asked me to try to see it from a parent's point of view, I'm asking you to try to see it from a transchild's point of view, we were born into this awkward situation by no fault of our own, I will say it, we are the victims of a screw up of nature, the best thing you could do as a loving parent is not to make it any harder. You think it's hard for on parents of transchildren, try BEING a transchild if you want to see what hard is.
I heard of a father once who went into a heart attack when he saw his trans daughter ~who he believed to be his son~ dressed as a woman. I mean I know heart attack is serious and I'm not making light of it, but its just so ridiculious I think, I mean he prolly would not have had that reaction even if he learned his son was a murderer.
Create a society in which you would like to live, not knowing what you're going to come into it as.