Seagal as Comedy
Seagal, formerly extremely talented martial artist, with several pretty decent movies way back (Under Siege, Marked For Death, Above The Law) has now become the reining king of unintentional comedy. My girlfriend and I eagerly anticipate every movie this dude makes because they are SO BAD THEIR FUNNY...I call that the "Brady-effect" (as in the Brady Bunch, the first show I ever watched that was so horribly done it was unintentionally funny. Unfortunately though, Seagal's last few direct to video movies are starting to cross the unintentionally funny barrier into just plain sucks all the way around territory..."Flight" wasn't as bad as I wanted it to be...In fact, the storyline COULD be salvaged by replacing a few actors and putting more of a budget into the mix...Funny sh*t in Seagal movies:
1) OBVIOUS half-the-damn-size-of-him stunt doubles
2) the Seagal run...when dude runs, he runs like a sissy
3) wiggerisms...hahaha...There's nothing funnier to me than Steve trying to play ghetto
4) Egomaniac-screenplay writing...the "He's the best, so damn tough that the word tough cowers in fear at his presence" kinda sh(t...I hope Seagal is just messing with the audience and doesn't really believe he's as cool as all that...hahaha...
5) The phone hold/gun hold bit...He holds a phone like he's a germophobe or something and holds a gun like a sissy...
6) the "WTF???" FACTOR...Ja-Rule being thrown out of a car and into a windshield to leap to his feet and shout back at Seagal about "whoopin his azz..." haha..Comedy GOLD!
7) The "I don't want to get involved" sh*t...hahaha..EVERY movie seems to have that element...and it's so predictable that it's funny to see/hear it when it happens...
8) the floor sliding crap...hahahahaha...AWESOMELY BAD...LOVE IT...
I wonder if Steven Seagal knows he has a fan-base that watches his movies for pure laughs...If so, I'll bet he does a lot of the sh*t on purpose...Mr. Seagal, if you read this stuff, I would like to thank you for your martial artistry in your earlier movies and the comedy-awesomeness of your newer movies...If they weren't meant to be comedic, sorry...Don't come to my house and bend my fingers back to the heel of the opposite foot or anything...I can, even though I'm partially cripple, STILL out-run you...
So, am I and my girlfriend the only people here that watch these movies like they're comedies?