MovieChat Forums > Everybody's Fine (2009) Discussion > Wouldn't you be mad?

Wouldn't you be mad?

posted 14 years ago by gollygopher
14 replies | jump to latest

I couldn't believe they kept David's situation and his death a secret just bc they didn't want him to worry..I simply didn't get why they were all so scared to disappoint him..and why the wife never told him anything..pretty much this man lived his whole life completely in the dark. That is drastic..to go to the point of concealing your own child from your own father and acting like someone elses apartment is yours..and to have your ex-husband come back and pretend to be your real husband again..wtf??? I would imagine scenarios like that would occur after suffering severe abuse..but the movie never delved any deeper than just saying he was hard on them and pushed them to be their best. A lot of parents push their kids and they don't end up having babies and lying about who they belong to.

I'd be pissed if my kids lied to me like that and tried to keep something like that a secret. That was that mans CHILD. He had a right to know. I'm not sure if I would be able to talk to someone again if they pulled something like this. on me

[–] 14 years ago

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[–] whocanitbenow75 14 years ago

I agree...the kids are all acting as if they lived through horrendous abuse and were scared to death of their father. I didn't get that either.

[–] viewangle 14 years ago

Well I can tell you that for some children, disappointing the parent is a huge matter, especially one who has high expectations of their kids. Also, they're aware that their father's health is not at its best, so that could also be a factor as to why they kept things from him.

[–] MinaBabaei 14 years ago

You got it just right with that pot. I have been in a similar situation - and still am. My mother left us many years ago, so me and my two sisters -(we're 17, 20 and 26 years old) are all he has. My dad is sick, and gets physically ill when he worries too much, so we all keep a lot of stuff from him. My dad has always pushed us to be our best, but never to do anything we didn't want to do, he really just wants us to be happy. But I found myself after 2 years of college, realizing that the only reason i went was because I didn't want to dissapoint my father. It all culminated one evening in a big fight, and he was so surprised when i revealed my college-situation. He told me to drop out, unless I myself wanted to be there, because he just wanted me to be happy - but he also said he felt it was such a shame to waste all my potential.
My father has always convinced us tt we can do anything we want to do, and 'the sky is the limit' and so on. He did not have the opportunities we have now, and thats why he's pushing us.
Anyway, I'll stop now,
BTW, I loved the movie, even though it really hit home, and I spent half the movie crying :D

- Mina

[–] Kariann1964 14 years ago

They may have been used to keeping secrets from him because Mom was always the sounding board. Their mother was deceased 8 months, the baby looked to be about 5 months. She didn't tell him he was a Grandfather again, obviously. I also think they just lost their Mom, they wouldn't want to do anything to upset Dad with his medical condition.

However, they sure didn't worry enough to make sure he could stay with them. I thought that part was cruel, with the exception of Drew's character who did ask him to stay.

I'm still trying to figure it out.

[–] gollygopher 14 years ago

I just don't get this movie in that aspect. Why wouldn't the wife ever tell him anything about his OWN KIDS? Sure, people worry but that is a part of life. Sounds like the mom got stuck with worrying the most about them. Again, made it seem like Mom was covering for them so Dad wouldn't abuse them or something, but it never goes that deep in the movie.

It still blows my mind they hid his death and stuff from him and wasn't even going to tell him he had a heart attack!

All of those kids with the exception of Drew's character, you're right, seemed self absorbed.

[–] christey_l 14 years ago

His wife did tell him about his children. He said he didn't listen. That is why in the picnic scene, he knew the truth. He wanted to believe their lives were perfect and exactly the way he wanted them to be, and didn't listen when his wife had told him otherwise.

[–] bpoz 9 years ago

Actually the other sister had a very good reason for telling him he couldn't stay with her. She was flying down to Mexico the next day to try to straighten out the situation with David. And they didn't want to tell him anything about David's situation until they had something definitive to share. The only one who turned him away when he could have accommodated him was the son. And remember, their relationship was somewhat strained and the dad showed up out of the blue with no advance notice. The son just didn't know how to spend time with his dad without the buffer of his mother. I felt bad for the dad but I also understood why the kids did what they did (even if I would have done things differently myself).

[–] jmichael3387 8 years ago

They did NOT plan to hide David's death from him. They simply wanted to find-out what was happening before telling him. All they knew at first was that David got arrested in Mexico. They simply wanted to take a few days to figure things out before they told their dad. Their dad had bad heart trouble, and they didn't want to worry him unless there was a real reason to. And maybe they were covering for their brother. Getting arrested in Mexico is not something I'd want blabbed to my parents right away.

[–] bpoz 8 years ago

I assume your reply is directed to the OP. I agree with you 100%.

[–] viewangle 14 years ago

I disagree, it's not stupid. It's the whole point, the secrets and the reasons behind.

[–] lockon_stratos 11 years ago

His wife died just months ago so his children didn't want to upset him some more with David's situation. They said they didn't want to tell him until they found out something definite. Amy was about to travel to Mexico to find out if David was in jail or dead. Things don't always go as we want so it was a wrong timing when they told him about David at the hospital after his heart attack.

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[–] 8 years ago

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[–] gcarras (2727) 3 years ago

Yeah, that, the reaspn Frank (De Niro) lost his meds (see others threadsa),etc. so many elephgants in the room there..