On forgiving and forgetting...

I thought one of the more powerful aspects of this film was the discussion of forgiving and forgetting. Too often people who have been through horrible experiences believe wrongly that "to forgive is to forget." I loved watching as Eva made bold proclamations about decisions to forgive, only to have others challenge her on the lack of forgiveness she still held on to.

At one point, she says something like "Even when I decided to make my proclamation of forgiveness, I didn't really know what I was doing until that moment...it was then that I felt the weight of unforgiveness lifted from me and I was free."

She was challenged by the notion that "if we forgive, next we will forget." But the funny thing about forgiveness is that if you forgive, you can't forget, because you must first remember...and enumerate...the violations.

Some of the commentators railed against cheap grace, and I admit I have not studied the subject all that much, but it did not seem her grace was cheap at all. She wasn't dismissive, but articulate: acknowledging the wrong, the hurt, the pain; then forgiving.

I guess the point is that Eva sees something that too many of us miss: to forgive is not weakness, but power. It's reclaiming your life as your own--as a life of value--and not allowing the past, or someone else's lack of repentance, to dictate your freedom.

What a great and honest look at the price and struggle of forgiveness.