MovieChat Forums > Jolly Roger: Massacre at Cutter's Cove (2005) Discussion > terrible

terrible

posted 19 years ago by BuyMeAPony
24 replies | jump to latest

This movie was easily the worst movie I have ever seen. It has actually become a running joke because it was so horrid. First of the effects were awful and the acting was even worse. Can we even begin to talk about the inconsistency all over the movie? Like how clocks in different scenes show different times and that sort of thing. Oh and my personal favourite some fake tittied slag dancing around a pole while some poor sod is getting battered with his own dismembered arm. She meanwhile never misses a beat. Let’s not forget the camera which was behind her the whole time suddenly records from a front angle and strangely looks just like the movie footage only in black and white with a record symbol. This movie couldn’t even be described as campy or fun it was just terrible. They could have at least but a bit more effort into it. I want those 90 minutes of my life back. Don’t even bother watching it, just take my word for it.

[–] kinginsano 19 years ago

yep! totally agree here, me and the wife were desperate for some popcorn, borrowed it from the inlaws, made some fresh popcorn on the grill, and got 10 minutes into it (actually right after the little beach slut got hacked in half)then watched a rerun, demolition man of all things!.. this jolly roger was bad, really bad!.. highschool drama class was light years ahead of this..

till next time..

[–] 19 years ago

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[–] AxiStride87 18 years ago

Agree 10000000%, brotha!

This movie is a Piece of ****!

The premise alone is utter crap.
And the effects are cheese as hell.

Sci-Fi movies are all utter ****!

[–] gamera-11 18 years ago

Being a fan of B to Z-rated movies, even this was too much for me to stomach. After the 4th stupid victim was killed on the beach, I changed channels to something more interesting... heck, even an infommercial about nose-hair trimmers is more exciting!

Still, as bad as it was, it can't beat the movie "Crawlers" for the honors of worst movie ever produced (by non-entities). The worst movie ever for A-List actors would have to be "The Avengers". <<shudder>> that still gives me nauseau.

[–] MCostas 18 years ago

hahaha Couldnt agree more since i work at the local dvd store i watched this for free and man was it bad like u said the characters had no chemistry between them and like u said the part in the strip joint with the camera angles oh man that was just plain awful or i like the fact that his face is rotten but his arms are ok "check the scene when he slits the teachers throat" still one word for this movie terrible

[–] Hockey_Guy1515 18 years ago

did anyone notice that in the first scene the main characters had an Astro van when they were at the beach.....then wen they broke out of jail they had a jeep...then when they pulled up at the roadblock they had a Ford Explorer????COME ON

or did you notice that when the pirate went to the bar and asked for a rum the stripper sait that there was no alchohol allowed in the town...and yet in the backroud there was a big sign advertising Jack&cokes!?!? or that there was a huge stocked bar on the other side of the room??

me and one of my buddys are going through blockbuster alphabeticly renting all of the *beep* horror movies like this one...it is sooo much fun!! there are soo many movies like this one out there that are just fun to watch.

[–] MCostas 18 years ago

then you should watch jack ol lantern nearly the same thing bad actors a stupid monster and a lame story hey what else ya need?

[–] Hockey_Guy1515 18 years ago

actually Jack O Lantern is in our next batch of movies

[–] banjopants 18 years ago

There is nothing jolly about this film and after spending £2.75 hiring it I felt like I had been rogered

[–] hbk540 18 years ago

Very funny. Heres my question though: At the end, when the chest dissapeared, it came back for no explicable reason, and for some god awful reason Jolly Roger had returned. That makes sense.

[–] Starrme 18 years ago

How about the facade of the mansion when the police chief goes to resign. The long shot of the building showed it was just a set. Truly bad.

[–] costume2358 18 years ago

Yeah, and I bet the fricken pirate was just an actor, too. Damn those filmmakers!

Oh, and for the record -- the house (as you think is a set) is really a house. They shot all of the Mayor scenes and a few other scenes in that house. It's a house in Los Angeles. Listen to the DVD commentary and you'll find out.

[–] hedgeborn 18 years ago

It boggles the mind that a film this bad actually got financed and found it's way into my local video rental store while people with genuinely good independent film ideas struggle to get them made. You could literally pick someone at random off the street and they'd probably write a better script.

The only possible entertainment value of this piece of garbage could be if you're in a very, very silly mood and want to laugh at some of the worst dialogue and special effects you've ever seen.

This movie is SO bad that it's not even open to interpetation. Anyone who gave it more than 2/10 must have the intellectual capacity of a potato.

We had a few laughs watching it, but at the same time we wanted to race back to the video store and behead the employee that actually recommended this piece of crap to us.

[–] 18 years ago

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[–] 18 years ago

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[–] hypnose 18 years ago

A mate and I had already chosen three other bad movies (which we watched 10 minutes of) and thought, 'This looks all right.'

Worst-Movie-Ever.

Thar! This Blows!

[–] satanssixgun 18 years ago

It wasnt that bad of a B Movie. If you think this is the worst movie you have ever seen, go rent The Zombie Chronicles. I saw that 3 years ago and it still holds the title for the worst movie I have ever seen. Rent it, I dare you. Check out Murdercycle too. Jolly Roger was not bad. ArrRRrGH.

[–] NYYfanlife90 18 years ago

Well guees what i just finished watching it and i liked it. So go Blow yourself. :)

[–] Shuyinaspel 18 years ago

I'm watching it right now. I was going to say that it wasn't that bad of a movie, (considering it's a B-Movie, and on the Sci-fi Channel, and about a zombie pirate) but then the part when the mayor is telling the kids about LeChuck or whoever came up. Man, that was some over the top acting. But hey, it did what I wanted it to do, it entertained me while I was recording Doctor Who so I could see it without commercials. I have to say though, it was pretty good for a crappy SciFi movie, I mean, these things are made on a budget of like, what? a hundred bucks? I mean, my dad was watching one and said I should get thirty seven dollars so I could make a movie for the SciFi channel. Well, I can't wait for Slayers! Vampires that walk in the light fighting soldiers?! In the Jungle!? BRILLIANT!! (yawn...)

[–] Foxtrot360 18 years ago

I agree with the Author, this is a terrible movie, i wont place it at the most horrible thing i ever saw, but it was definently bad.

But you know what movie is REALLY bad?

A movie called Scarecrow, but you know what, I'll go on to say that most Sci-Fi channel movies are obviously low budget and, usually bad, theres very few "Good" movies on that channel.

[–] rsanders98 16 years ago

This movie is such a piece of drivel, I want my two hours back, and why can't scifi make any good ones? I didn't like pirates of the carribean that much, but they are still way better than this junk, and just what was up with the music?

[–] the_zookeeper 16 years ago

Werd brother. Scarecrow was terrible.

If you want an even worse movie about scarecrows, find the one with fighter Ken Shamrock in it. Blarf. Not just barf, but bleh included.

The Asylum makes the worst movies ever, and yet this one sounds so bad that I'm going to watch it in twenty minutes when it comes on just to see the mistakes.

If you want a good laugh watching a horror movie, check out Bloodfeast 2. Priceless.

The gene pool could use a little chlorine......

[–] Gambit_Girl 16 years ago

Do you think there's anyone that likes this movie...? (Just out of interest)

Hmmm...I got the impression that a horny teenage geek obsessed with zombies, pirates, and boobs made this movie >.< I can't believe we wasted £3 renting this *beep*

Through our strength we'll make a better day
Tomorrow we shall never surrender

[–] teacher694 9 years ago

The lousy guitar music during the intro was a dead give away that this movie was going to be trash. I only watched 5 minutes of it. This is one of those throw away movies. You throw it away after watching for a few minutes.