You're right. I havn't seen Mysterious Island or whatever, I was just going through Kyle McLachlan (correct spelling?) filmography (sure he made a fool of himself in the overrated How I Met Your Mother, but he's a good actor, he even made me appreciate certain episodes of Desperate Housewives which is disturbing since my usual taste in movies are canonized medium-expanding but subversive works of art like Stratjka, Kirasshipo Potjomkin & L'age D'ôr, horror/found footage/crossover [e.g. Lake Mungo, Noroi, Audition, Hollow] & american & french grime/biographies/documentaries [Midnight Express, Scarface, JFK, Malcolm X, Un Prophete, Slam, Gomorra etc.], so even if my taste ain't the most sophisticated - I watch Terminator 2 twice a year since the mid-90's - Desperate Housewives is out of my range, to say the least, but when the person to me made demigod among actors by his haunting performance in Twin Peaks: Fire Walk with Me (1992) showed up in season 2 or 3, it became watchable all of a sudden) but when I saw someone contemplated on this movie being the worst of all time, I immidiately knew it wasn't someone within the industry or someone with more than pedestrian knowledge or interest in film.
There's, for example, romantic films, w/ budgets ranging from maybe 1000-5000 dollars, sold on seemingly independent labels (they're kinda like harlequin books, but films, and worse) The bulk of actors probably volunteer in hope of getting discovered while the lead actress (always a woman) get paid at least a little better than a waitress. Once in '05 when me & some friends were intoxicated & walked into a supermarket, a cover w/ a crazy hot, half-descent (i.e. not naked) woman catched my eye. I picked up a random handful of films of this brand, hoping it was very very softcore porn or something, or maybe some obscure 90's gems of some kind, unknown & low-budget murder mystery series or something, who knows? But no. It was like a mini-soap opera, 70 insufferable minutes of a downright offensive attempt at a movie, the most horrifying thing I've ever seen. I have seriously enjoyed puppet theaters w/ better & more subtle acting & even if I'm no big fan of porn I managed to got offended & provoked by the fact that they recorded this rank abomination in the kind of mid-priced white LA-houses-/condos w/ all white interiors & a yucca palm in the corner they use in typ A1 porn. So it felt twice as disgusting - if they would've hurled their lines at each other in a forest or in an airport instead, one could try to watch the backgrund & zone out. They walked past a artificial pond with a little fountain now & again, probably to give the illusion of a course of events, moving forward in time. There was only two characters of any dramatic value; the woman & the man. We didn't watch any of the other two (btw brand new at this time, prod. year 2003), we bought these three dvd-shaped chunks of offal for about 15 SEK (1 USD) each but it hurt anyway. Anything with Kyle McLachlan & an unnecessary dragonfly, uninspired acting & ugly CGI or whatever they said about the mysterious island is fine with me, in comparison w/ e.g. the Kardashians. And DEFINITIVELY compared to these vile harlequin-style drama/romance-anathemas. There's a million movies out there worse than Plan 9 from Outer Space (not only cause it's so bad its good or anything like that), the industry, just like any industry, doesn't always produce cause of supply & demand; my guess is larger corporations own these little studios & distribute them by their supermarket/gas station branch, maybe to fill some quota to be able to perform some legal hocuspocus or to be able to pass along debt to these little proxy-owned studios/offices & then declare them bankrupt & the IRS strikes down on the goalie. Enough theories now, havn't slept in 48 hours, I'm rambling. There's always worse movies, that's my message in a nutshell. G'night.
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