Things I learned watching It Waits

1. It's perfectly normal to bring a parrot into a bar with you.

2. You can tell your girlfriend that you want a life with her and that if her life is miserable so is yours, but it won't get you any sex. As soon as you tell her she's going to jail for negligent homicide, sex is on.

3. A dresser that can be moved by a girl who weighs 115 lbs (mostly breasts) is supposed to stop a demon who can flip cars from getting into a room.

4. The above room is made entirely of windows.

5. It's a great idea to leave your girlfriend alone, especially if where you're leaving her is where the most activity has occurred.

6. You can spend days out in the woods and still look like you have just showered and put on freshly laundered clothing (the professor).

7. You can boil water and steep tea in a matter of 15 seconds.

8. If you are the owner of a car that was in an accident and you are drunk, the police will assume you were driving.

9. That parrot is not only as smart as a four year old, but it can survive a car crash and find it's way home from the middle of nowhere.

10. A demon who is supposed to enjoy tormenting it's victims killed everyone quickly and only toyed with the heroine (explained away in a crappy, convoluted manner by the professor).

11. "I should have changed that prick's oil" is supposed to mean something.