Things you learned from this movie.

1) A vampire doesn't like foreplay before drinking a hookers blood.

2) A priest does not require any proof to be convinced that he is talking to an immortal that hunts vampires. It is just common sense.

3) If you are recruiting vampire hunters, put out an ad in the newspaper and have a support group meet at the local gym.

4) If you are a vampire that has been avoiding Van Helsing for a century and you live in fear of being killed by him; I recommend moving to a different zip code.

5) For being the best vampire slayer in the world, Van Helsing is pretty oblivious of the vampires around him: 1-His best friend that he entrusted to bang his wife. 2-The orderly that has been stealing blood at the hospital he works at for that past couple of years and looks like a crack addict.

6) Vampires can't tie knots around a captive's wrists.

7) Detectives let civilians tamper with their homicide scenes if they are looking for vampires.

8) I learned that a movie with a $580 grand budget can look like a $10 budget movie.