MovieChat Forums > I Want Someone to Eat Cheese With (2006) Discussion > problem? he won't date fat WOMEN!

problem? he won't date fat WOMEN!

posted 15 years ago by tlynn_33
45 replies | jump to latest

Why has no one else seemed to notice this? I'm NEVER the first to notice the sexism in movies. I'm not even a feminist and in fact hate most of their BS. But this movie was extremely sexist.

I was really looking forward to seeing it. I like Curb Your Enthusiasm. I like weird movies with weird titles. I like Sarah Silverman. I even like fat guys.

I was disappointed at first just with the thrown-together feel of the movie. Trying to do the Curb Your Enthusiasm listless walk down the street doesn't work in a movie. There has to be a point.

And at the end, the point is, this guy is lonely because women won't date fat guys.

But the real point is, THIN women won't date fat guys. I'm sure if James were open to dating larger women he'd find a really nice girl right away. But that's not what HE wants because HE "don't want no FAT CHICKS"! He's just as shallow as the women who reject him.

The only "real" women in the movie are his mom and the lame-ass women in that stupid weight-loss support group. But I bet he's walking down the street and passing women left and right who he doesn't even see because they're... his size. Or even thinner but not Silverman-thin.

So, this is a movie that's supposed to make you feel bad for this poor lonely guy, but what about all the lonely women who can't find a good relationship because they're even a little overweight or some other nit-picky thing! When was the last time you saw a fat girl with a hot guy??? Why should we feel bad for a fat guy who can't get a hot girl??? And he DOES in the end! He gets freakin' BONNIE HUNT!!!

By the way, I'm a size 12--the ever-debated "is a size 12 fat" size. And I'm way thinner than Jeff Garlin!!!

And if you think Bridget Jones' Diary is the fat woman's version of I Want Someone to Eat Cheese with because a 140lb Renee Zellweger got used and then found a decent guy--you're off by a good 200 lbs!!!!

ADDENDUM: Apparently this post has caused responders to question me personally and try to psychoanalyze me instead of focusing on my argument. For the record: Without posting a nude shot, I will describe myself physically: I'm an average height and weight, and I have a somewhat athletic, booty- AND boobylicious physique.

THIS: http://www.theoccidentalobserver.net/wp-content/uploads/2011/03/diewogeklimschns8.jpg

NOT THIS: http://www.theoccidentalobserver.net/wp-content/uploads/2011/03/MC2-3.jpg

The former image is what used to be considered hot until Twiggy. The latter is the female equivalent to Jeff Garlan.

And I'm not a depressed singleton. I'm happily married to a fitness nut who thinks I'm hot as hell. (He's a T&A guy, and he "likes me for me," to use a worn-out phrase AND song lyric at once.) I don't consider myself a fat chick who landed a hot guy. I am a "normal" chick who landed a "normal" guy. I've been warned about generalizing, but yes, it's NORMAL to be an average weight, to be happy with that, and to be with a guy who thinks it's hot. And it's normal for a guy to like tits and ass. :P

So this is a rant, yes, like a lot of posts on message boards, but it's not because I'm insecure. It's because I have a brain and can see craziness for what it is and it pisses me off. Why does that have to signal mental instability? FKCU!

CASE IN POINT: http://cine-o-rama.blogspot.com/2009/03/rubenesque-comedians.html

All the guys seen here in bodysuits have been in movies where they were with "hot" (thin) women or are with "hot" (thin) women in real life. If they want to challenge stereotypes, why not show the world that they don't hold women to the same standards that they themselves eschew?

[–] secretlyeatsdinosaurs 15 years ago

because fat women are disgusting sub-human mutants who do not deserve the attention nor affection of the male gender... problem solved =)

[–] tlynn_33 15 years ago

So according to you, fat MEN are NOT subhuman mutants who don't deserve the attention or affection of the FEMALE gender??? Problem not solved, only completely misunderstood.

[–] TheBeardedWonder 15 years ago

tlynn - the other poster was joking, I thought that was pretty obvious.

But nowhere in the movie does it say he won't date fat chicks. The women he meets, that he might actually have a shot with, happen to be thin (silverman with the similar goofiness/we like to joke around, Hunt with the similar fascination with obscure jazz).

So you just kind of assumed that...it never said it...

"I mean, a shark can't stop swimming or it'll blow up" - Nelson Muntz

[–] tlynn_33 15 years ago

It's IMPLIED in the women they CAST as the women he meets. They are obviously not representative of the average woman. It is highly unrealistic that they would be the women he would meet and "have a chance with".

And you never know when people are joking about things like that. It seems clear to me that that view of women, whether he was joking or not, is an implicit part of our culture. If you don't see that, you're denying it. Something doesn't have to be stated explicitly to be true.

[–] TheBeardedWonder 15 years ago

Split hairs all you want, the fact is the two women who were interested in him were thin. One had sex with him, and the other saw his play, both are clearly into him, is he supposed to say 'no thanks, i'm waiting for a fat chick'?

Also, we only see a few months in this guys life, how do we know he hasn't dated big women? You can assume he hasn't just as easily as I can assume he has. But beyond that, what you're really upset about is the casting it sounds like...

And if you skipped every flick where it showed an unreal portrayal of women, you'd never watch any movies... also I don't hear these complaints from men when the new teen heart-breaker movie for women comes out... whens the last time you were on a board and a man said "I hate the way they portray men as great looking with amazing abs and perfect hair."

C'mon, it's a movie... if you want reality, go outside...

"Hey homeless man, move it. This is where i'm setting my D's. My big flaming D's"

[–] tlynn_33 15 years ago

"if you skipped every flick where it showed an unreal portrayal of WOMEN, you'd never watch any movies."

that's the point. ALL movies portray women unrealistically. But these "teen heartthrobs" you're talking about are only in the lamest of movies. There are all kinds of movies where the women are hot and the men are frankly not (woody allen anyone?). That's why men don't complain--they have no room to.

The point is that this movie, like any movie that tries to be good, tries to get at some kind of reality--loneliness, in this case. Why not go further and deal with the reality of loneliness from the perspective of a fat WOMAN? because deep down people buy *beep* like you say that other guy was "jk" about, that it's disgusting for a woman to be fat--more so than for a man to be.

[–] bedlamworld 15 years ago

fat guys are gross

[–] Defenseman13 11 years ago

Fat men can date hot girls if they have money.

Fat white girls can date black guys and guys in the military from the Midwest.

There are no skinny black girls.

END OF THREAD.

http://us.imdb.com/name/nm2339870/

[–] whistal 9 years ago

Fat men can date hot girls if they have money.

Fat white girls can date black guys and guys in the military from the Midwest.

There are no skinny black girls.

END OF THREAD.

this literally was the most amazing post on IMDB i have ever seen

---
Have a heart. Please spay and neuter your pets.

[–] marloweisdead 15 years ago

Why would Jeff Garlin make it from the perspective of a fat woman when he is a fat man and wrote the film for himself to star in?

An overweight man being interested in a thin woman is in actuality probably closer to the reality you seem to be demanding.

As happens in 'real life' the character is getting by on his personality and his humour (ditto Woody Allen) but you'll also observe that he hasn't had much luck either romantically or sexually.

I think it's quite ridiculous to charge that because a film features an overweight man having a solitary sexual encounter with a slim woman some kind of counterbalance must be installed to represent an overweight woman. Nonsense.

[–] tlynn_33 15 years ago

Someone else who's missing the point...

...which is that the movie's goal seems to be to make you feel bad for poor Jeff. This was never the goal in any Woody Allen movie. In fact, Woody Allen seemed to be conscious of the fact that it was ridiculous (i.e. funny) that he always ended up with beautiful women. Jeff's humor and personality are limited in their effectiveness by his droll and unwarranted self-pity. It's a movie that's BASED on his self-pity: "poor me, all I want is someone to eat cheese with..." as long as she's not fat from it, apparently.

[–] marloweisdead 15 years ago

Because I addressed certain of your points and not every little point you made does not mean I was missing "the" point (which one exactly, you used the term more than once over your several posts).

the point is, this guy is lonely because women won't date fat guys.

But the real point is, THIN women won't date fat guys.

I addressed this point which is in fact an opinion which is easily disproved.

that's the point. ALL movies portray women unrealistically.

This is patently not true.

The point is that this movie, like any movie that tries to be good, tries to get at some kind of reality--loneliness, in this case.Why not go further and deal with the reality of loneliness from the perspective of a fat WOMAN?

Again I responded to this quote, so this point wasn't missed.

As other posters have pointed out, you're making an awful lot of assumptions about this film and basing your tirades & assertions on them. If you want to get really angry go and watch Only The Lonely which is where a down-at-heel John Candy manages to get Ally Sheedy... wow that'll make your blood boil.

As for your Woody Allen / Jeff Garlin comparison you're making out that I made that connection between them. I didn't. I simply stated that both get through with their humour and their personalities, which they do.

[–] hunterk221 13 years ago

Dude it's a movie, not real life.The character that Mr. Garlin plays is not a real person. Often times when people judge the plot of a movie based off the characters they tend to forget that ITS A MOVIE. I cannot stress this enough. What's there is there and what isn't there is only part of your human perspective. Obviously you've thought a lot about this than just after seeing this movie. Maybe you should take it up with hollywood for not wanting to CAST overweight women as much as say a highly entertaining thin woman such as Sarah Silverman. Maybe if it were Lisa Lampinelli you would't have an opinion on it. Look, you could chalk it up a million different ways all you want but the fact is, its just a movie. And by the way you saying him being with a thin chick being highly unrealistic is just beating back everything you believe to be wrong about his "character". Thats like saying women are allowed to get way more upset about the double standard than men are.

[–] tlynn_33 13 years ago

So there's no point in writing anything on these message boards at all because they're all "just movies"? Oh, unless all I cared about was the technical quality of a film? Are you saying that movies don't make implicit or explicit statements that can be responded to? Not to mention, you used a lot of words yourself to make the non-point "it's just a movie." That's not an argument.

And frankly, women ARE allowed to be more upset because the double standard, at least when it comes to body image, almost always works against women much more than it works against men. If, for example, Bridget Jones had actually been obese like Jeff Garlin, instead of just overweight, you might have a point. But such is not the case. It is one harsh reality of being a woman (which I'm assuming you are not) that being slightly overweight makes us "fat" (and therefore undesirable) whereas men are not considered "fat" until they are clinically obese. And this movie, albeit "only" a movie (nevermind how many people go see it), is part of the problem.

[–] 13 years ago

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[–] SammyTerry 13 years ago

Sorry, but the chubby chaser teacher had some pretty hefty saddle bags. I'm not saying she's fat, cuz...she isn't..no more than Kate Winslett was "fat" or "a full figured girl" in Titanic, but she definately was not thin, or "in shape" or whatever the current Hollywood standard implies. The idea that the chubby chasing teacher wouldn't date him because he's fat, or that she is in fact a thin good looking woman is just silly. She's a porker. Attractive, yes, but still a porker.

"I don't care if he's been rogering the Duke of York with a prize winning leek!

[–] tlynn_33 13 years ago

Are you being intentionally stupid? Just trying to push my buttons?

COMPARED TO JEFF GARLIN, is Bonnie Hunt a "porker"? We are talking about double standards here.

Not to mention, the fact that you would even use the "current Hollywood standard" to judge Ms. Hunt implies that you have bought into that standard, again, a standard that is used to judge WOMEN but not men. And a standard that has nothing to do with health (i.e. real beauty), since it is much more restrictive than even the Body Mass Index (in order to be attractive by the current Hollywood standard, most women would have to be underweight to the point of being unhealthy.

So either you're joking, or you're a completely unreasonable person.... ?

[–] celluloidandriod 15 years ago

This thread is hilarious.

"So, this is a movie that's supposed to make you feel bad for this poor lonely guy, but what about all the lonely women who can't find a good relationship because they're even a little overweight or some other nit-picky thing! When was the last time you saw a fat girl with a hot guy???"

Alright I'm going to go out on a limb here and take a guess. A 'good relationship' is being with a 'hot guy' in your book, yes? And you feel you can't find a 'good relationship'(hot guy) because you're a size 12(pretty meaningless without knowing your height, frame etc) and so the movie advocates double standards. Does that sum it up?
Well, not the case. Underdog movies are designed to appeal to all who feel like the underdog. Simply put, anyone who feels frustrated in their love life due to some perceived defect can identify with the story.
So why do underdog love stories overwhelmingly feature men? Well, would women identify with a genuine female misfit? Or to put it another way, many men can identify with a male misfit and women in the audience can find him 'funny'.
Now whether or not men would find the female misfit 'funny', women would find her insulting and wouldn't identify with her at all. Because women judge each other differently than men do.
So what is the converse? Cinderella stories. She gets a makeover and then everything changes for her. That's what women can relate to.
If you get a chance to read this I hope it gives you some peace on the subject.

[–] 15 years ago

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[–] center53 14 years ago

FAT WOMEN have a following, there are a lot of guys who love fats girls. But for FAT GUYS it is different, there is sexism but it is not towards women but towards men.

Fat women might want to lose weight but are never short of a date, guys arn't as picky as girls.

As far as the movie, your assuming a fat guy needs to be with a fat girl?! Sexist.

[–] simingsm 14 years ago

In Shallow Hal Jack Black ends up with a fat woman. Did I ever mention, I hate the movie Shallow Hal.

You like fireworks, boy? What do you say to a rocket...in your pocket?

[–] Spellbinder888 14 years ago

I completely agree with the OP.

The film industry is jam packed with movies about beautiful women fawning after fat losers.

Its just the fat producers/directors/writers' wet dreams....

zzzzzzzzzzzzzz

[–] tlynn_33 13 years ago

I never thanked you for your support here. OH MY GOD! Thank you! I don't get how people don't see this. This thread has really started to worry me about how far the brainwashing has gone!

[–] MysteryReaderReturns 14 years ago

Fat guys have man boobs...no dice! They are girly looking.

If you hate Jesus Christ and are 100% proud of it, copy this and make it your signature!

[–] iamjohnsname 14 years ago

Fat guys are often good humored. Fat chicks are depressive.

So I reckon fat dudes would have better chances than fat chicks.

Sooner or later, everyone needs a haircut.

[–] musicbytes 13 years ago

I know a guy who was rejected by women when he was younger because of weight, Then he lost the weight and he looked great and he went out of his way to date women who might not get dates because of there weight, As long as they had a positive personality. Many can learn from my friends example.

[–] tlynn_33 13 years ago

And why might it be that fat guys are able to maintain a sense of humor? I would wager it's because being fat doesn't mean they can't lead a normal life. Whereas for women, because of the unrealistic expectations placed on women by men AND by other women as regards their physical appearance, being overweight does in fact mean that people treat you like *beep*

Someone mentioned Shallow Hal.... I read about an interview with Gyneth Paltrow where she said she walked through the lobby of a hotel wearing the fat suit. She said people clearly treated her differently--didn't make eye contact, avoided her, etc. Things like that make people "depressive".

[–] 13 years ago

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[–] jn15-3 13 years ago

You just sound like some bitter hog who needs to get off the computer and onto a treadmill.

--
What rating I've given every show or movie: http://www.imdb.com/mymovies/list?l=37342039

[–] tlynn_33 13 years ago

Thank you for being a perfect example of the kind of sexism I'm talking about.

I knew pigs like you would respond exactly this way, which is WHY I SAID: "By the way, I'm a size 12--the ever-debated "is a size 12 fat" size. And I'm way thinner than Jeff Garlin!!!"

So either you didn't read my whole post, or you actually think a size 12 is fat because "fat" and "thin" for you have been distorted by the media (anorexic models, air brushing, etc.).

Whether a size 12 is or isn't fat, it's clear that it's a lot smaller than Jeff Garlin. So... who really needs to just stop whining and get on a tread mill? Hmmmmmmmm....

[–] 13 years ago

[deleted]

[–] musicbytes 13 years ago

no remco it is you who is the hateful narrow-minded judgemental unkind jerk who is clearly a creep of a human being

[–] 13 years ago

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[–] whistal 13 years ago

a lot of the guys on this thread seem like they are morbidly obese and jeff garlin with a hot chick plays into their vicarious fantasies. that's what i picture when people get kind of intense and rude on such topics as can be witnessed in this thread

---
Have a heart. Please spay and neuter your pets.

[–] keykeyx100000 13 years ago

Wait, so are you saying because he's a big guy he's not entitled to preferences?

I'm a size 4 and I am a real woman too. I'm offended by your post.

Oh, by the way my boyfriend is around his size and I chose HIM.
Don't worry though: I'm his preference.

Go figure, right? :/
What a silly thread...

[–] tlynn_33 13 years ago

Congratulations. The fact remains that WOMEN his size (and much smaller than him) are very often de facto denied THEIR right to have "preferences." That is ALL I am saying. You should consider yourself doubly lucky that (1) you ARE a size 4 and (2) your "preference" group of men is a wide pool, no pun intended. ;)

[–] 13 years ago

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[–] curlyfroggy 12 years ago

yeah tlynn, I dated one *American" woman who said of herself before we met she was what you say you are: "AVERAGE"!!!!!!!!! In Europe and other healthy (!) countries, it's considered *overweight*, not only by men, but by doctors and health specialists. So rewinding: "average" used to describe oneself in the US is a metaphorism for "overweight", that is FAT in a dictionary that does not care about being politically, but rightly so, etymologically, linguistically and scientifically, correct.
"it's NORMAL to be an average weight"
what do YOU call an average weight? average for the overweight-ridden USA? 1 meter 50, 60 kilos?
"to be happy with that"
yes, you can be happy with anything, even being unhealthy, too fat or too thin!
"And it's normal for a guy to like tits and ass."
so, you have T&A..., saying so you prove you either have a problem, or you're fat. A girl/woman without a problem doesn't say about herself she's got T&A, because hey, they all have! and if you consider that having SMALL tits and a thin ass is less feminine, you're the sexist.
And so an ugly person can only hope to date ugly persons? and thin ones thin ones? and fat ones fat ones? and ideals and dreams - and just TASTES!- are in your opinion a perversion and a sign of sexism? All poets and songwriters and directors and writers are then proud to be perverse sexists. And I would not like YOUR T&A as you describe them, rest assured.

[–] tlynn_33 12 years ago

Yet another messager focusing on women and me and not on the main point I made in my post: MEN with double standards when it comes to physical appearance. Whether or not YOU think a size 12 is fat for a woman, American or otherwise, does not change the fact that men much larger than that refuse to date women unless they are tiny, and that is a load of BS. That is all I am saying. Call me what you will.

[–] EmeryDoyle 12 years ago

i get what you're saying. and you're right, fat women get treated like sh**.

youtube.com/theelefishjellyphant

[–] 12 years ago

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