a breakdown of a troll's review.

a breakdown of a troll's review.
Worst movie ever made, zombie or otherwise!, 18 August 2008
Author: DaveStewartsGayGrandpa from United States
1/10

Your screen name robs you of any credibility

*** This comment may contain spoilers ***

Spoilers? You don't even address anything about the movie itself. All you do is spread hate, lies and your jealousy. Let me guess, Mr. Stewart stole your girlfriend?

WARNING: gunzblazing is Dave Stewart, the so-called director of this abomination. Don't be fooled.

THAT IS A LIE because I am neither David B. Stewart III or Gunsmith Kelly so try again SPANKY

David B. Stewart III is clearly not a loser. Just read his bio because he sounds like a really cool guy. He also clearly has no trouble attracting the ladies
David B. Stewart III is very talented. You're just jealous of his success

Maplewoods is beyond awful and it's time you stop blaming lack of budget and start laying the blame where it belongs, on Dave B Stewart the 3rd.

After reading this I became curious as to where David B. Stewart III ever blamed budget for any alleged shortcomings in his film

I've never even seen anywhere in print where Mr. Stewart has taken the time to discuss the pros or cons about this classic movie. If anything he should be more visible because fans would like to hear his thoughts since he chose not to record a commentary

Maplewoods isn't terrible because you didn't have money for M-16s, it's terrible because the script was awful and the movie was very poorly directed.

The script was not awful. It was deep. Maybe too deep for a troll like you.

Can you blame "budget" for the bad acting? No.

The acting is very believable and true to life. If this troll had any contact with human beings he would see how good the acting in Maplewoods is because the actors don't come off like they're acting. They seem like real life people and not like the hollywood cardboard that Mr. troll probably believes to be realistic.

Spend some more time and find people who can actually act.

Everyone in this film did a wonderful job. The acting was very good for a horror film.

Can you blame "budget" for the horrendous dialogue? No. Having everyone speak military jargon does not make the characters interesting, it makes them boring.

It's a military movie so the characters speak in military terminology. that's called realism. DUH

P.S: The only thing boring is your review

Can you blame "budget" for having every character leave 20 seconds of "dramatic" silence before he responds to what the other character just said? No, that's just lousy directing.

Stop exaggerating and maybe someone will take you seriously. What you mentioned never happens and I should know because I've watched the film over 20 times.

Can you blame "budget" as for why an 80 minute movie feels three times longer than it is? No.

If anything, the movie is too short. A concept this big warranted a much longer run time

Dave has no idea how to pace a film which means he has no idea how to edit either.

David B. Stewart III paced the film like the true professional that he is. He's obviously a true student of cinema which is more then can said for you, TROLL

P.S: The editing of Maplewoods is a work of art so open your eyes and stop hating for the sake of hating

Let's face it, you could give Mr. Stewart 10 million dollars and he'd still make a horrible film because the boy can't write, direct, or edit. That's the truth, plain and simple.

That's not the truth, it's your biased opinion. David B. Stewart III showed that he can transcend budget to deliver a supreme product
P.S:
You'll be the first one in line to watch his next movie so don't try to lie and pretend you won't. For someone who claims to hate Mr. Stewart you really do spend an awful lot of time on this message board. Sounds like you might be in love with him.

Go ahead and flag this post for deletion because I've copied it and will repost it every time you get it removed.

Feeling lucky punk?