Can someone explain this to me?

After watching the movie and reading various responses on this and other forums, I think you may be wrong, James. I've examined the movie from two perspectives - the boyfriend dying and Cox's stages of grief, and both or just her dying and Cox's stages of shock. According to most psychologists, the stages of grief and shock are very similar.

Shock has 3 stages (if you exclude the fact that you've entered a state of shock):

1. Denial
2. Anger
3. Acceptance

Grief has 5 stages:

1. Denial
2. Anger
3. Bargaining
4. Depression
5. Acceptance

While the movie divides into 3 sections - denial, despair, and acceptance, it excludes anger, bargaining, and depression. Most people would associate despair with depression but that would leave 2 stages of grief to be explained. Bargaining is not despair, so anger is the only other possible substitution for despair.

Despair is defined as:

1. to lose all hope
2. to be overcome by a sense of futility or defeat

Anger is defined as:

A strong feeling of displeasure or hostility

Depression is defined as:

(psychological definition only) Psychology. A psychiatric disorder characterized by an inability to concentrate, insomnia, loss of appetite, anhedonia, feelings of extreme sadness, guilt, helplessness and hopelessness, and thoughts of death

Interestingly despair could easily represent both anger or depression (hoplessness for depression and anger over defeat). Using these definitions, let's assume both situations.

Given the movie's content, let's assume that the denial act was actually denial. The despair act of the movie opens a few more possibilities. The next steps are either anger (in a shock context - i.e. she was shot) or anger/barganing/depression (in a grief context - i.e. only her boyfriend was shot). Assuming grief, anger would assume the form of her snapping at students and being short with the investigator (there may be more incidents of anger portrayed in this stage). However in the grief context, we see a lot more. Anger - all of the above. Bargaining - she pleads her boyfriend not to leave, she begs the cops to help find the photograph shooter (also includes some anger), she asks things of her students, etc. Depression - she doesn't feel like eating when she's with her mother, she's the victim in the robbery (helplessness), she feels guilty for her boyfriend leaving (she tells him of the affair), she is sad, she sees blood and her ears bleed (thoughts of death). The finaly stage of acceptance in a grief or shock context could be interpreted the same.

Given that the ambiguity lies in the middle of the movie during the despair stage (by definition and by movie content), I would argue that the middle falls more in line with the stages of grief. Therefore, her boyfriend is shot and she is not. The photo on the wall of the streched out hand is either symbolic or she took it when she saw her boyfriend lying dead on the ground (she is an artist, remember). The point of the movie jumping back and forth through time and thoughts is symbolic of the stress she deals with as she overcomes the trauma she's been through.

I would love to hear your or any replies regarding this post. I have thought aobut this movie quite a bit and I am excited by the thoughts generated by the film.

Sources:

Stages of shock:
http://www.cityu.edu.hk/ls/lotus&rose/popup/shock.htm

Stages of grief:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Five_Stages_of_Grief

Term definition:
http://dictionary.reference.com

Yes!!! I almost cried too, I found it really sad seeing them both lying there.

So let me get this right I only finished watching it for the first time 10 mins ago. all the stages that are being shown is actually when she is lying there dying and its showing the different scenarios of what could have happened, that she is imagining. until she realises she is dying?

someone mentioned that she had only met her boyfriend that day..? im a bit confused at that.

I think I will need to watch it again to pick up on things, like i dont get the bit with the slides and how she sees her car outside shop, the bit with the wine falling, and how in the acceptance she stops it falling... like did that bit happen in 'real' life'. and was she really seeing a therpist. I know I may seem stupid asking these questions.. but Im going to watch it again soon, to try and pick up on things better.

~Sarah~