Lilo and Stitch jokes part 2
I can't find the other thread..WAH!
nor can I think of any at the moment...
I b steelin yer foods.Kthxbai.
An Experiment pod
Fell into a tree
It wriggled out of its branch
And wiggled right on me
I picked it up
Put it in a box
And when I opened up the lid
An Experiment-like butterstick flew out!
I could never make one
Even if I tried
Cuz only God in Heaven
Can make a butter-fly!
PLAY DRAGONFABLE!!!
RANDOM THOUGHTS:
If Yang was tied to a 15 foot rope, then how can he reach an alien toe 30 feet away? The rope isn't tied to ANYTHING?
Note to self: Only open mouth to insert sandwiches.share
Clever! (And he'd probably walk over, eat the toe, then burninate the jerk who tied him up in the first place)
PLAY DRAGONFABLE!!!
The other day some little girls in my neighborhood were playing ding dong ditch.
This what happens when experiments play it.
Sparky: I'm bored.
Stitch: Hmm,well,we could play ding-dong-ditch.
Sparky: What's that?
Stitch: You just go up to someone's door,ring the doorbell,then run off!
Sparky: Sounds fun.
*Stitch runs up to house after house,ringing doorbells and running off,making loads of people mad.Soon it's Sparky's turn.He walks up to the house of a certain girl...*
and rings the doorbell*
Sparky : Zee? I did it! Yay!
Stitch : Good,now ru-
*door opens*
Girl: Aw,he's so cute! *takes Sparky inside*
*Sparky walks out of the house an hour later,looking very bedraggled*
Sparky; What did I do wrong?
Stitch: You forgot to ditch,you ding dong! That's what happens when you ring the door bell of your geometry hating fangirl!You get glomped.
Sparky: Remind me never to play this game again.
Stitch: Come on,let's go do it to Jumba...
Sparky: I'll pass.
Hmm..not as funny as I thought it would be.
I put the 'eir' in 'weird'.
Hmm..not as funny as I thought it would be.
Oh, yes it was!
---
One day, Carmen was enjoying a fun-yet-romantic dinner at the hulau with the guy she was dating at the time, who just so happened to be Richter. Carmen had ordered a sweet potato, which had just arrived. However, when she bit into it, it didn't squish like it normally did. No, it crunched! With a startled gasp, she spat it out.
"Hey, you okay?" Richter asked.
"Yeah, I'm bueno," Carmen said, "It's just that my sweet potato crunched. Sweet potatos are not supposed to crunch. Why did it crunch, I wonder?"
Spoldyhead, who just so happened to overhear Carmen's question, was happy to answer. "Well, ya see," he explained, "They don't cook the sweet potatoes here because there's more vitamins in the sweet potato when you don't cook it."
Richter seemed astounded, but then again he could have been saracastic. "Hey, no kiddin'?"
But by that time, Splody had wandered off to light more tiki torches.
Carmen sighed. "You know what I say, Rick?"
Richter shrugged. "No, what do ya say?"
"I say," Carmen replied, in all seriousness, "take a pill and cook the darn vegetable!"
(Based on a monologue a friend of mine made up)
PLAY DRAGONFABLE!!! share
Haha.
I found all of our old jokes....
When Experiment 626 does push-ups, he actually pushes the ground down.
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Experiment 626 doesn't play kick the can; he plays kick the keg.
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Every time Experiment 626 stubs his toe, he rips up concrete.
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Experiment 626 gets really touchy when somebody asks him, "What's the matter, Stitch? Feeling a little blue?"
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What Experiment 626 thought was a mirror was actually Experiment 624 (she had spilt blue paint all over herself).
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Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is based on a true story. It just so happened that Experiment 601 accidentally swallowed a live turtle one day, and when it popped out, it was six feet tall and knew karate.
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Experiment 221 tries to avoid getting ideas, because he's afraid he'll blow up that little light bulb and hurt somebody.
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One time, Experiment 501 downed an entire bag of Skittles; it was learned that day that Skittles cause aliens whose powers are water-based to become extremely hyper and/or insane. Nowadays, Experiment 502 will not allow any Skittles on their island.
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Experiment 625 absolutely hates having others talk to him when he's on a plane. All he wants to do is take a nap, but all these people are always asking him, "What do you do?" and trying to strike up a conversation. So, 625 decided to answer their question "What do you do?" wirh the reply "I'm a brain surgeon". Amazingly, the conversations would end!
One day, just as 625 was about to start dreaming about a gi-normous ham sandwich, a man came and sat next to him. The man asked 625, "What do you do?" 625 replied, "I'm a brain surgeon." The man exclaimed, "So am I!"
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Experiment 150 had had enough. He was tired of being bossed around by Experiment 149 day in and day out! One day, he heard that wives should submit to their husbands...well, Experiment 149 wasn't exactly a wife, per se, but they lived together enough for her to start submitting to him!
That night, Experiment 150 stormed up to Experiment 149. Placing her on a talbe so that they could see eye-to-eye, Experiment 150 boomed, "Now, look here, Bonnie! I'm the man of this relationship, and from now on, what I say goes! And I say that YOU are going to fix ME a glorious feast, and then YOU'RE going to draw ME a warm bath, so that I can relax! Then after that, guess who's going to brush my fur and fix me up all nice-like?"
Experiment 149, hands on her hips, gave Experiment 150 a level glare and replied, "I'd guess the funeral director."
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What does a mirror do when Mertle looks in it?
It breaks.
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What kind of dessert would Hammerface make?
Pound cake.
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Carmen should be the next Chiquita banana spokeswoman!
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Wanna hang out with Belle?
I hear she's a scream!
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'Hamesterviel' sounds like a lunchmeat made from rodents.
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Is it nice having Snooty as a roomate?
Are you kidding? He drives me batty!
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Experiment 625 learned that, in order to avoid brain surgeons, he had to move from first class to coach. On this certain trip, he noticed that no one was sitting next to him. Experiment 625 grinned: "Now I can lay down and relax!" he said.
But then, just as the doors were closing, something happened.
"Oh, no," groaned Experiment 625.
A woman--with a crying baby--had jumped onto the plane at the last second.
"Oh, Lord, don't let her sit next to me!" Experiment 625 prayed.
She sat next to him, placing the baby in the seat between them. Right away, Experiment 625 could tell that this woman LOVED to talk. "So!" she chriped, "What do you do?"
Experiment 625 decided to tell her the truth; that he was a galley officer on a Federation ship BRB-9000 for the Captian of the Intergalactic Guard. As they conversed, the baby began to put everything in his mouth and suck: the seatbelt, the magazines, Experiment 625's arm...
...Experiment 625 didn't think the baby was sucking so hard until he looked down and noticed that several of his new tatoos were missing.
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A few hours passed, when suddenly, a smell arose from the seat between Experiment 625 and the woman.
The woman gave an apologetic smile to Experiment 625. She asked, "Do you mind if I change him here? It's only a wet one." What was Experiment 625 to do? He had already told her he liked kids! The woman changed the baby there.
Surprise, suprise, surprise. It wasn't just a wet one. The kid looked like he had eaten an entire bottle of mustard!
Needless to say, Experiment 625's experience in coach was no better than the experience he had in first class. And, to this day, Experiment 625 refuses to put mustard on his sandwiches.
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Lilo: What's the difference between Stitch and a pig?
Angel: You tell meega.
Lilo: One likes to eat, sleep, belch, and roll in the mud. The other is considered intellgent and has a curly tail and a flat snout.
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Nosy: Hey, Sparky! Did you hear about Frenchfry's new cooking show?
Sparky: Ih...it zeemed a lil' bit overdone.
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Yang: Didya hear?
Yin: Hear what?
Yang: About Belle.
Yin: What 'bout her?
Yang: She swallowed a rubber band!
Yin: So?
Yang: Now she makes snap desicions.
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Bonnie: Your name should be Algebra.
Clyde: Why?
Bonnie: I can't figure you out.
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Stitch: Which came first - chicken or egg?
Angel: Ya got me!
Stitch: Chicken, of course. God naga lay eggs.
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Even when he isn't sad, Stitch still looks blue.
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Mr.Stenchy is like rotten food, he stinks.
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Stitch, Angel, Lilo and Sparky all were sitting in a tree.
Then all of them but Sparky jumped down out of the tree.
Why didn't Sparky jump down too?
Because he is yellow. (cowardly)
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Why did Pleakley cross the road?
His wig was on the other side.
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Why is hard to talk to Cannonball?
He keeps on butting in!
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How many Pleakley's does it take to ruin dinner?
Just one!
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How many Sparkies does it take to fix a lightbulb?
I don't know, but he blows one up each time!
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Which experiment is the brightest?
Topper
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What do you get when you cross a macaw with Stitch?
A parrot that will eat your crackers and drink your coffee.
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What do you get when you cross Stitch with a foodfight?
A big hyper choatic mess!
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What happens when you leave Pleakley alone in the kitchen?
You get an unappetizing meal
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What happens if you leave Stitch and Angle alone together too long?
Nothing! I said 'Angle', not Angel!
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Three blind Experiments were sitting on a rock. And then Stitch pushed one off! NO!! Two blind Experiments were sitting on a rock. And then Stitch pushed one off! NO!! One blind Experiment was sitting on a rock. And then Stitch pushed one off! NO!! No blind Experiments were sitting on as rock. And then they all beat up Stitch for pushing them off! NO!!
(Yeah...boredom can affect you in the strangest of ways.)
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Sparky flies into a bar.What happens?
He screams:OW!
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What did Mr.Stenchy say when the wind changed?
It all comes back to me now!
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Slick: How do you like my new shopping show?
Gigi: Sorry, Slick, but I just can't buy it.
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Lilo: I figured out how we can get your dog to stop begging for food at the dinner table!
Victoria: How?
Lilo: We can let him taste some of Pleakley's cooking.
*I don't know if Victoria has a dog...I know she has a cat and Snooty...*
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Lilo: Jumba! Jumba! Finder thinks he's an anchor! Is there any hope for him?
Jumba: Nope. He is to be being sunk!
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Lilo: Jumba! Jumba! Sprout thinks he's a tree!
Jumba: Then we should be nipping this in bud.
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Bonnie: Hey, Jumba? Is there anything you can give me and Clyde for our kleptomania?
Jumba: Of course! How about Klepto-Bismol?
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Stitch: Hey, Lilo. Are caterpillars good to eat?
Lilo:Ew, no! Stitch, you don't ask stuff like that when people are eating! Why do you ask anyways?
Stitch: Well, you had one in your salad a minute ago, but it's gone now!
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Angel:Stitch I think the spaceship is flooded.
Stitch:Well, where is it?
Angel: It's in the swimming pool.
Stitch:Yep,it's flooded.
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Why did Angel paint her toenails rainbow colors?
So she could hide in a bag of M&M's.
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Carmen's hat looks delicious!
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*Carmen appears*
Carmen: Jumba! I have a ringing in my ears! What should I do?
Jumba: Get unlisted number.
*With a shrug, Carmen leaves, and Yin appears*
Yin: Jumba! Yang think's he's a shepherd!
Jumba: Don't be losing any sheep over it.
*With a confused blink, Yin leaves, and Squeak appears*
Squeak: JumbaJumbaJumba! Clipthinkssheisapicnicbasket! (In case you can't read that, it says: "Jumba Jumba Jumba! Clip thinks she is a picnic basket!")
Jumba: She sounds like basket case to me.
*With a grin, Squeak leaves, and Phantasmo appears*
Phantasmo: Jumba! Swapper thinks he's a tube of glue.
Jumba: He must be losing grip on reality.
*With a satisfied nod, Phantasmo leaves, and Slushy appears*
Slushy: Jumba! I keep thinking that I'm the Abominable Snowman.
Jumba: Sorry, 523, but I am not getting your drift.
*With a groan of "Never mind!", Slushy leaves, and Reuben appears*
Reuben: Jumba, everyone tries to take advantage of me. What should I do?
Jumba: Give me two hundred dollars and let me borrow your spaceship.
*Reuben leaves, Deforestator rushes in*
Deforestator: *scared* JUMBA, JUMBA, EVERYONE'S IGNORING ME!
Jumba: Next, please!
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What happens when you give Sparky M&M's?
The same thing that happens to Yin when you give her Skittles.
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I want to see Gantu do the Cha-cha Slide.
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What's Hamsterveil's favorite song?
The Hamsterdance!
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Angel was playing snake charmer one time.
Did she use a real snake?
Yep, it was a pink feather boa. Stylish, but deadly.
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What happens when you cross a blue alien and a joke book?
STITCHes of laughter!
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which experiment do you need when you go fishing?
Sinker
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Which experiment is spoiled rotten?
Mr.Stenchy.He's a little stinker.
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Stitch was playing with Nani's makeup. Wanna know how I knew that?
He's got lipstick in his teeth.
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You know, Cannonball didn't always look the way he does now.
His original purpose was to steal and eat all your food.
Well, once he and a bunch of other experiments were playing tug of war. He decided to tie the rope around his big old stomach.
Bad Idea.
The experiment pulled on him so hard that his big belly was pushed down and around to ...you guessed it... his butt.
Jumba changed his purpose and now Cannonball bounces on what used to be in front of him.
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What do you call it when Jumba grabs his rod and heads on down to the old watering hole?
Nuclear fishin'.
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Stitch: Lilo want to know what word sounds different when cap...cap...
Lilo: Capitalized?
Stitch: Ih!
Lilo: Sure. What?
Stitch: Polish!
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Bonnie: Hey, Clyde! What do you do when an actor gives a bad performance in Hungary?
Clyde: I don't know.
Bonnie: You boodepest!
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Lilo: Stitch went to a play one time and said that it tickled him.
Carmen: Did he laugh?
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What did Sparky say when he tried to catch a pesky squirrel but couldn't?
Aw, nuts!
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What do you get when you cross Reuben with the beach?
A sandwich.
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What is Sparky's favorite store?
Circut City.
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One day, Sparky started playing a game called the Okay Game. There are two levels of play: the first level is an Okay sign below the waist, the second level is two upside-down Okay signs over your eyes (like a mask). If someone looks at a first-level Okay, they have to let you hit them in the arm; if someone looks at a second-level (after the person doing the second-level calls your name), you have to lay flat on your back. You can protect yourself from a second-level by doing an Okay sign on your cheek, however.
All day long, Sparky was tricking Experiments left and right. It seemed as though no one could escape his Okay Game.
Stitch, meanwhile, watched the procedures with great intent. After he saw Sparky make Angel lay flat on her back, a plan formed in his mind.
"Hey, Sparky!" he called out in Tantalog, "Whatcha doing?"
Sparky turned around and smiled. "It's the Okay Game," he explained, "What you do is..."
Sparky saw that Stitch already knew how to play the Okay Game.
Two seconds later, Sparky found himself staring at blue sky, wondering why the heck he had thought the Okay Game was so much fun.
*The Okay Game is actually been going on at my school for about a month now. I'm sick and tired of it, and I haven't had to fall flat on my back yet (I've been hit quite a few times, though)...this was my revenge on that anoying game!*
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Stitch:Have you seen Sparky lately?
Lilo: Yeah, he's acting way crazier than usual. What happened to him?
Stitch: He got his wires crossed.
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Angel, Stitch, and Sparky are all telling each other jokes.
Sparky: I heard this really funny one the other day it goes like this: Mama's so fat...
Stitch: Sparky, we don't have a mom.
Sparky: Oh. Well, Jumba's so fat that you have to grease him down to get him to fit through the doorway! *laughs*
Jumba: I am hearing that! (starts chasing Sparky)
Angel: Sparky!
Sparky: What? *turns around and sees Jumba.* Whoa snap! *Sparky takes of ,fearing for his life.*
Stitch:That joke was kinda funny.(He tells it and they both laugh.)
(Jumba spins around and glares at Angel & Stitch.They too run for their lives)
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Sparky: Jumba's so dumb, he'd get lost in a round room.
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What happens if all the cousins are sitting in a tree, and then it falls on them?
They get squished!
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Stitch: It's a bird ,it's a plane..
All: it's SuperSparky!
Sparky: Can I change clothes now? I mean this was fun at first but now I'm starting to feel stupid, really stupid. Plus the spandex is giving me a rash and the tights are giving me a wedgie.
Angel:Aw c'mon Sparky, blue spandex looks good on you.
Stitch: *in flirtatious voice* Yeah...
Sparky:Ya know, Stitch would look geat in a Batman suit....
Stitch: Uh- uh no way! You can't make me...
*Angel makes him*
(Five minutes later)
Sparky: Dun na-na-na-na-na-na Batman!
Angel: Aww...how cute....
Stitch: Get me out of these tights! They are itchy! Meega nala queesta spandex!* tries to rip outfit off*
(Sparky had Jumba make the Batman suit indestructible so Stitch can't rip it. Clever,huh?)
I put the 'eir' in 'weird'.
OMIGOSH! W00TZ0RS!!! YASIRZ AND W00TBEER!!!
Now that that's done...
Lilo: With great chocolate...comes great responsibility.
Fudgy's new owner: Great...can I take him home now?
(If you've seen the Return of Larry-Boy trailer, you'll understand)
*EDIT* My iPOD joke isn't up there! So...
Belle: Sparky, why do you have an iPOD in your mouth?
Sparky: I'm trying to think music.
There's a reason why they call me the provider of randomnesssness.
LMBO at this whole thread.
I put the 'eir' in 'weird'.
All I might need are the names on who made the jokes before in the first place. There are some I have submitted, but the other jokes... man, I need names (pennames that is).
Note to self: Only open mouth to insert sandwiches.share
I'm pretty sure i know who did all of those jokes in my big post above.
My pen name shall be Boogles!
I've got a mit and I'm not afraid to use it!
Thanx for reminding me.
You have any more?
Note to self: Only open mouth to insert sandwiches.share
Um...
Hmm....
What did Tank say after he swallowed that Leroy clone?
'Mmm...tastes like chicken.'
Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.
If Stitch got a car what kind would it be?
A Mazda 626
If a Stitchoholic (as QueenofSilliness calls it) got a car, what kind would it be?
A Mazda 626. A blue one. Or maybe the red one.
Death isn’t the way.
Life is.
Red one with a white racing stripe down the middle...yeah.
Haha.
What do you get when cross a hula dance and a rooster?
Cocka-hula-doo!
Yeah,I'm pathetic.
† God's been good to me. Oh,God's always been good.†
Here are some more where that came from:
PHANTASMO'S DIARY:
Day One: Jumba showed me around the entire laboratory complex, and the first thing when I approached a wall, I climbed it.
(You have to understand a thing or two about ghosts to get the joke!)
Note to self: Only open mouth to insert sandwiches.share