You only go over the blatently obvious things that happened in the movie. I don't think you understand the movie anymore than the rest of us do.
You didn't touch on the supernatural aspect of the movie. Grace's ability to control fire, the two being somewhat linked in that Violet can feel what happens to Grace (the fire burns violet's finger, the picture Grace burns and Violet feels it, ect). The girls are emotionally detached from Luke (even Violet to an extent), but emotionally connected in some way that is never explained fully. There is an early obsession with mermaids that never played out, as well as an exact account as to the profession of their father who is described only as a "doctor of sorts". As you said, the fate of their mother is never explained and early on they have some serious issues with thinking about their parents, specfifcally their mother.
Violet seems to have been treated poorly by their father (she seems to not posess as much supernatural power as Grace), which is evident when she is learning to play the recorder. Even when Grace fails at raising the flame on the candle, he is nice to her, and then she lights the matchbox on fire and he says nothing.
I don't know if you're supposed to come to your own answers for this movie or it's just something that isn't meant to make any sense. However, there is much more going on throughout the movie than just two sisters planning to make a baby, kick the guy out, and mistakingly falling in love with him.
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