MovieChat Forums > Eulogy (2004) Discussion > Fav Quotations...SPOILE RS*

Fav Quotations...SPOILE RS*

posted 20 years ago by badpoet
53 replies | jump to latest

It may not be a classic, tho I think it is a cut above most of the dark(black) comedy/dramas that, or even straight comedies that impact our retinas on a regular basis (unless we're very careful). The acting is very very good (where it is required - tho some comedic dumbing down is noticable in places), there are emotive moments and most of the jokes just really work (for me). This film skillfully mixes Sex and Death in one, well, sexy and deadly package...

Here are a few lines that crack me up:
The Twins on their 11th birthday to their mother: "This isn't what we ordered...we ordered an erotic cheesecake."

Lucy: "You wouldn't know a sex-toy if it left a battery in your vagina"
Alice: (stern/deadpan)"My vagina...has served as sacred passage for 3 anatomically correct children."

Judy: "Hi boys, I'm Lucy's life partner Judy"
The Twins: "'Levsians' *grin*"

Alice: "This isnt about you, so..."
Judy: "Are you talking to the sex toy?"
Alice: "I'm sure you're a very nice lesbian..."

Skip (to Judy): "Don't worry about Alice, you think she's gone, she comes back, you know, like herpies" and then (to Daniel) "Don't do that, don't throw a lemon at me in front of a lesbian."

Lucy announcing her planned wedding to Judy:"What is it Fred..."
Ted: "I don't know...But I can't wait to find out what you two vageniuses are up to"
Ted: "It's a compound compliment"

Katie (searching for videos of her "actress" mother that she never knew) : "Do you have any Cookie Tooshoola movies?"
Clerk: "I'll check, they're probably all out...this one's probably her best, just for it's utter lack of story"
later (V/O)..."Most people don't even like to think of their parent haveing sex with each other, much less with multiple bad actors."

Anyway I'd better stop now, as I'm likely to just transcribe the whole movie if I drink any more of this coffee...

PS: In case you get that impression, this film is NOT just about silly lesbian wisecracks and japes, but those are some of the funnier lines.

[–] douces 20 years ago

I must admit, the erotic cheesecake was pretty damn funny.

ETA: were you writing these lines down as you watched the movie???? How did you remeber them?

[–] Vongrove 19 years ago

Katie - So after it stopped raining grandpa

[–] yougetnada 19 years ago

haha

[–] TStormJack 19 years ago

i was already laughing in tears from the boat exploding, that line got me soooo bad. i love zooey.

[–] simonsaysstop 19 years ago

Skip: It was so dark I had trouble finding my room.
Lucy: You found my room alright.
Skip: It was dark.
Lucy: So you hid in my closet.
Skip shrugs.
Lucy: With your kids?
Skip: WE WERE LOST!

[–] TStormJack 19 years ago

Skip, watching the two women fight: "Ok, that's almost enough!"

[–] kdiesel34 19 years ago

"A cemetary is like an old age home for the dead - a place where you can visit your loved ones without the bother of daily care and maintenence." - Funeral Home Director

"Vag in a town. What's a vag?" - Barbara, Edumund's other wife.

[–] coolguy5090 19 years ago

I like when the mother is handed the glass of water after spilling the pills all over the floor, and then she suddenly shoves all of them in her mouth and Skip's like, "I knew it!!!".

Funny stuff.

"Drama is life with all the boring parts left out" - Alfred Hitchcock

[–] JimJacobs25 19 years ago

Skip and Twins are on front porch:
Skip: Be polite, lets try not to be the biggest freaks in the circus.
Fred: What the hell does that mean?
Ted: He wants us to say 'no thank you,' instead of, 'eat my ass jello'
Skip: Stop it, for christs sake, where do you guys learn that *beep*
Mother walks to door and opens it
Skip: Mom...Sorry about dad...yeah.

[–] commieford 19 years ago

The twins - "we're just laughing at what you vageniuses are up to"

"what did they call us?"

"vageniuses"

[–] abutterw 19 years ago

Most of the good lines in the movie went to Skip and his twins. That line in the basement was classic, where he starts it off humorous and ends it in a tragic cry for his father's attention.

[–] simonsaysstop 19 years ago

Kate: How often do you smoke?
Daniel: Never in the morning.

Kate: You told me mom was a social worker who died of caring too much.
Daniel: (laughs) What did I say she did?

[–] thepeacehippie 19 years ago

I just rented the movie on DVD and I love it! I'm gonna buy it as soon as I can.

My favorite quotes are mostly the ones everyone wrote and what Alice said to one of the twins when he was talking about her food, he said "Thanks, but I already had my mucus course for the day". And she says, "Listen, you shut your spit cave you fowl mouthed little sh** fu**er, before I beat the living snot out of you". I could not stop laughing at that.

I loved it when their mom came back from the hospital after trying to kill herself and as she walks in the door Alice says, " Hello Mother, try it again and I'll kill you myself".

I also loved when they were at the funeral and Alice comes in playing the piano and singing to Samantha and Lucy says, "This is bullsh**, no screw her she has made a business out of persecuting me and I'm supposed to sit here at my father's funeral and watch her fu** sing at Samantha, screw that!"

I watched this movie everyday since I rented it. It's that funny and that good! It's my favorite movie now.

[–] sir3a 19 years ago

"And when I'm dead, I want to be cremated. Then I want you to mix my ashes with the ink they use to print money so I'll be everywhere."

[–] 19 years ago

[deleted]

[–] rwomack21 19 years ago

I thought the part where they are sitting in the basement getting hi, Kelly Preston is hilarious as a stoner telling a story, its classic anybody else agree?

I will kill you until you die from it..

[–] thepeacehippie 19 years ago

I agree, Kelly Preston was hilarious, I loved it when she couldn't remember what she was saying after she took her puff. It was so funny. And as the credits are going up at the end of the movie, it shows some of Lucy and Judy's wedding reception and Skip is about to make the toast and he's trying to tell a joke but Lucy doesn't want him to so she and Judy hustle him til Judy gets the microphone then she hits him in his head with it, it was funny. I have always loved Famke Jansen and I started loving Kelly Preston since the Maroon 5 video "She will be loved" and "Joey" because I hadn't really seen any of her movies. Now I'm gonna try and see all of them. Because I loved them two on Eulogy and Debra Winger.

[–] angel32 19 years ago

That was so classic.

[–] whiteygilmore 19 years ago

Skip: "There once was a girl with a cripple, due to the weight of her oversized nipple"

[–] dansing256 19 years ago

I just loved when the silent husband and kids had their hands in the air when Zooey went to get the door.

[–] Lynchian3 19 years ago

First off I don't think I need to go into just how BRILLIANTLY funny this film was... Anyway, here are a few of my favorite lines...

"So I have an announcement to make. Me and Judy--" -Lucy
"Judy and I." -Judy
*Twins start to laugh*
"... Judy and I are--What's so funny?" -Lucy
"Oh nothing. Just can't wait to see what you two vageniouses are up to." -Ted
"Good vocab word!" -Fred
"WHAT did he just call us?!" -Lucy
"Vageniouses." -Judy
"What is THAT?!" -Lucy
"It's a compound compliment!" -Ted

"I can't eat that! It looks like it fell outta' a horse!" -Skip
"It's a side dish, it's FUN." -Alice

"... So, next week..." -Lucy (then takes a hit of pot and TOTALLY stops talking about her story completely)
"So... Next week?" -Judy
"What's next week?" -Lucy
"Sweetie, you were telling a story..." -Judy

"STOP it! Stop FEIGNING those little TWITCHES! If you don't like it here you can just go and stay at your friends' houses. Is that what you want?! To go and LIVE with your friends!?" -Alice (to her kids who meanwhile have said NOTHING)

"Will somebody please scratch my nose?" -One of the Twins using an "old" voice while talking about their dead grandfather in his casket before them

"Somewhere I think I had heard once, that the good die young. I am only twenty-nine..."