MovieChat Forums > The Notebook (2004) Discussion > I like the movie, but the characters beh...

I like the movie, but the characters behave despicably...

posted 9 years ago by shrilltrills
15 replies | jump to latest

Allie and Noah may have ended up spending their lives together, but they couldn't stop themselves from running over other people in the process. The way Noah treated that war widow he was sleeping with before Allie came back into the picture was just rude, and what Allie did to her fiance was despicable.

People may say they were in love and couldn't control themselves, but they had choices. They could have stopped themselves from having sex, knowing that she was engaged to someone else. Lon absolutely did not deserve to be treated like that. He was a good guy who treated her well.

This is a big part of why Titanic will always be the better movie to me. In that movie, yes, Rose had sex with Jack while engaged to Cal, but Cal wasn't like Lon. He was an emotionally abusive narcissist, and she had made it clear that she did not love him. She was being forced to marry him, unlike Allie who actually did care for Lon. I don't fully condone what Rose did either, because it would have been better to end the engagement first, but it was much easier to root for her and Jack as a couple since they weren't trouncing all over good and innocent people in their desire to be together.

With Allie and Noah, it wasn't even a one time thing and then "oh my God, what did I just do?" They had sex over and over and over again over the course of days. And there was no mention of her fiancé until her mother showed up. Just disgusting behavior really.

The fact that Allie and Noah were "in love" doesn't excuse their behavior IMO. When she realized she still loved Noah and that he had actually written her all those letters, the RIGHT thing to do would have been to think it over and then tell her fiance she's sorry but she is going back to Noah. Not have sex with Noah multiple times before telling him.

It just makes it really hard to see these characters as sympathetic. To me they seem like two selfish and codependent people who are willing to trod all over others to get what THEY want rather than two people who are genuinely and purely in love.

[–] happyphantom9 9 years ago

I agree with you. I hated this movie. I didn't like either of them. Noah was psychologically manipulative in the beginning. Yeah, that's really romantic. I agree that they both behaved terribly towards their significant others, yet it was supposed to be justified by showing that they ended up together for decades, having a family, etc. In real life a relationship like theirs wouldn't last. I felt so bad for Lon, I was on his side.

[–] TheJDEProject 9 years ago

I agree with everything you said. My first time watching it right now and with as much attention it got for being so romantic, I'm not really impressed by the characters treating others the way they are treating them. It has it's good parts but overall I'm disappointed. =\

[–] mhpayne78 9 years ago

I think they set it up this way to make the choice that much more difficult for Allie. The fact that Lon was a nice guy made her have to think really hard about what she really wanted... and in the end, she made the right choice for herself (despite having to hurt the other man). She was young and acted impulsively when she slept with Noah because her true feelings had taken over. Maybe it was selfish, but I guess the heart wants what it wants. As far as the war widow goes.... Noah was a young man... and here was this woman willing to sleep with him despite knowing that his heart was elsewhere. She sort of brought that on herself.

[–] flicky-3 8 years ago

I agree with this post completely.

Thanks for explaining it so well to others.

[–] hufferh 8 years ago

At least Cusack and Moynahan broke up before he ever found the new/old girl again. Kind of like Meg Ryan and Greg Kinnear in You've Got Mail breaking up before her and Hanks got together.

- 'Tact is just not saying true stuff.'

[–] lswote 8 years ago

First off I have to say you missed an important point with the war widow, she thanked Noah when she left because seeing Noah with Allie made her remember true love and that she had been settling with Noah and now that she remembered love like she had with her husband she couldn't wait until it happened to her again.

As far as your other point about going immediately back to her fiancee and telling him she was staying with Noah, sheesh when was being human ever that easy? Exactly why does her fiancee need to know she is breaking up with him before she returns to the man she had chosen to have unbriddled passion? That will make the breakup easier knowing she was faithful to him until she left him?

Finally I think it worth mentioning that while while engagement is a promise to marry, it us not an irrevokable one. Engagement for a large part is trying on the idea of being married to the betrothed person, and trying out the relationship at a deeper level. It goes without saying that it would a far worse thing for Allie to marry her fiancee after realizing she still lived Noah than the temporary hurt of leaving him.

[–] jeffer23 8 years ago

I disagree with your view.

Allie is a product of her parents. She has parents that push the idea of preferring a rich person over a poor person regardless of personality or interests. Allie has a mother who deceived her with the hidden letters. Based on this information, her parents have probably been guilty of other deceptions and bad advice as well.

When she realized she still loved Noah and that he had actually written her all those letters, the RIGHT thing to do would have been to think it over and then tell her fiance she's sorry but she is going back to Noah.

Love doesn't work that way. It comes from something more than just being logical. There was actually no escape for Allie in this circumstance. Allie was in total confusion when she suddenly realized she had to make a decision. She wasn't sure if she made the right decision after making a decision. If she had not been ambushed by the letter situation in the rain on the pier, she would have never left Lon (it would have been completely plain and civilized like the day before).

Allie actually only made one mistake and it occurred under duress of deception which was set-up by her mother. I would not call this despicable at all. In fact Lon should be very upset with the mother instead of Allie.

[–] StephieVee 8 years ago

I agree, anyone who posts about Allie's behavior never posts about her mothers deception and the confusion she must've felt when she realized Noah never ended it.

[–] Gwasgray 8 years ago

This is a big part of why Titanic will always be the better movie to me. In that movie, yes, Rose had sex with Jack while engaged to Cal, but Cal wasn't like Lon.

I prefer Titanic to this as well (for the spectacle rather than the love story) but isn't it more realistic that Lon isn't a pantomime villain like Cal?

[–] duffasaurus 8 years ago

People like Cal exist in real life. You should count yourself lucky that you haven't met one.

[–] duffasaurus 8 years ago

I still like this movie just because it's beautifully done but it does have its flaws and Titanic is a much better movie for a multitude of reasons.