MovieChat Forums > Tipping the Velvet (2002) Discussion > HONESTY

HONESTY

posted 15 years ago by bornwriter17
4 replies | jump to latest

I understand how scared a person would be at that time being gay or bisexual. The intolerance from most people was common and even amongst family. However, I believe that if love is true it would be so strong that it would make people brave enough to come out in the open.

I'm in love with a guy from Saudi Arabia who I want to marry someday. Although he and I share many common interests and beliefs, we still have challenges with how different our backgrounds are, him being Muslim and me being agnostic. I was terrified to meet his mother when she came to visit about a year ago because I was positive that she would never accept us in a relationship. After all, she must have known we were intimate just by the fact that he was living here in the US where (unlike Saudi Arabia) sexual relationships are legal. However, we were honest with her and to our pleasant surprise, she accepted us and ADORED me.

Life is full of surprises both pleasant and unpleasant. When it comes to relationships that are considered taboo (my relationship being interracial), people should try their best to bring their relationship out in the open (as long as the relationship isn't taboo in a harmful way like incest or pedephelia). If both people in the relationship are open about it, then they will find that they are opening the possibility of being accepted more than they would expect. Honesty is respect.

[–] THESTARCHILD_90 15 years ago

Your point is entirely valid but Kitty was obsessed with not only advancing in her career, but above all, she was very mentally weak and egocentric all the same time, while being unbelievably insecure with her sexuality. As a homosexual I have come across a ridiculous amount of people like Kitty(in the modern day western world!!). Insecurity unfortunately really does get the best of some people. Truthfully, I never found her to be a very good person. On the contrary, I found her to be a selfish jerk!

[–] trixie-k-88 11 years ago

...Are you a woman? Because at first I thought you were a guy saying this, considering you were saying how hard it would be to be gay. How nice that your straight fiance's mother liked you. But you can never, ever, ever compare your interracial/interfaith relationship to a gay one. If you were a guy as well, your boyfriend and you might have had death threats, been attacked, and disowned by his family, even killed.

You really don't know what it's like. I can't say that enough because this post is so naive it's really bothering me. Many people don't accept, don't want to accept, and just want to destroy those they don't like, even if it's their own family. Sometimes honesty in this situation isn't the best, but it's excruciating alienation, or even death. Just because your rather commonplace, hardly taboo anymore relationship worked out doesn't mean you can compare it to LGBT relationships, nonetheless any in the 1890s. Don't talk about things you don't understand.

[–] Cm003325 10 years ago

Exactly I agree with you, my catholic mother said to me " better a prostitute than a lesbian daughter but better yet is a dead daughter" and that was 15 years ago and hasn't spoken about it once since then. In her eyes I'm dead and treats me like it.
It's very naive but you won't make that mistake again I'm sure if you've returned to this post and for your sake I hope you don't because its insulting.

[–] Cm003325 10 years ago

I was addressing the interfaith post if I wasn't clear about that sorry.