MovieChat Forums > Midnight Mass (2003) Discussion > Why did I waste 98 min. of my life, and ...

Why did I waste 98 min. of my life, and where can I get it back.....

posted 21 years ago by shortiedee81
8 replies | jump to latest

PLEASE PLEASE DO NOT RENT THIS MOVIE...if any of your friends have this movie call for help immediately and destroy the movie upon sight! I have never seen such a waste of a blank DVD in my life.

M - My God, why me, why me???
I - I wish the fat girl would have fallen off the bike and crushed her skull!!!
D - Dominatrix vampire needed the ball gag for her own suck!!!!!!!
N - Need a better getaway car than a Buick Rivera !!!...vroom vroom skreech
I - Irish dude is the only one that can act!
G - Get up and run...fast, and far far away!!!!!!
H - Help! There's still 30 min. left.... (falls on knees and begs)
T - Tittie shots aren't even arousing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

M - Muscle bound priest with tight jeans can't run!!!
A - Anal exploration is less painful!!!!!!
S - Skater, goth, punk boys were all poooooohhhhhhssss!
S - SH*T, SH*T, AND MORE SH*T

Here is our update to the cast and crew:

Fat Chick - Darlene of Rosanne's cousin (found livin in the van down by the river)

The Vampire Priest - Joe Pesci and Al Pacino's illegitimate son.

The Good Priest - Now a Chuck Norris action jeans model.

Goth chick - moved in with fat chick down by the river.

Head Goth guy - now a disgruntled employee at Mott's Applesause Factory after being rejected as backup for Twisted Sister.

Irish's dudes daughter - Still as hardcore as her jacket says...now working as a fluffer in Vegas.

IF YOU KNOW ANYONE IN THIS MOVIE OR ANYONE THAT HELPED MAKE OR FUND THIS MOVIE...GAG THEM AND LOCK THEM IN A ROOM AND PLAY THIS MOVIE ON REPEAT FOR 7 DAYS, UNTIL THEY VOW NEVER TO DO IT AGAIN!!!

This review took more skill then the entire making of Midnight Mass, and I had more fun writing it then I ever would have watching it.

If I have offened anyone as much as this movie offended me I sincerely apologize.

[–] aaronsaft 21 years ago

so you didn't like it?

[–] 21 years ago

[deleted]

[–] TerryMcC 20 years ago

I just saw the thing.... The most amazing thing I found around it was that not once was the "actor" Marvin Schwartz who plays the Vampire Priest able to pronouce the word T H E as anything but da, "We run da world now!"

Terry

[–] MerrysMushrooms 20 years ago

Was it really that bad? I have a family friend who was in it.

[–] sutek_x 20 years ago

Yeah it was really bad. But atleast your friend was paid. The movie was only part of the book, and the acting was really bad.. melodramatic overacting with the main characters.. it looked like the whole thing was slapped together in a day or 2...

[–] psihateyou 19 years ago

so... after wasting 98 minutes of your life... you proceeded to waste 20+ more minutes writing a ridiculous pseudo comedic review on IMDB. Logical. Let it go, it was a movie. You'll live to see another day I'm sure.

[–] troyparc2001 19 years ago

PS U EAT ME!!!!!!!!!!

[–] ulht1 18 years ago

Concise, well thought out, brilliantly expressed. Well, actually not. (above this.