MovieChat Forums > Love Actually (2003) Discussion > surprised how disgusted i was by this mo...

surprised how disgusted i was by this movie


I put this on thinking it would be just a light-hearted, sweet, fun film. I remember how much everyone loved it when it came out.

But it turned out to be AWFUL. I'm trying to work through my visceral reaction against this movie. I just hated so much.

There are three main reasons:

(1) The movie is not about love, it's about infatuation. "Love" here is framed as sex or initiating a grand gesture to be with a person you barely know. Long-term relationships don't come out well at all. One man's wife dies and then is barely mentioned again by him or her son, and by the end he seems to have found a new lady to replace her. Another man apparently cheats on his wife for little reason and risks wrecking his family. The just-married couple is perhaps happy, but the main storyline with them is the best friend who is in love with the bride. Overall I'm not seeing deep "love" here... not even a fun rom-com type love. Just random hookups and empty infatuations. Depressing.

(2) The Sept. 11 framing. I just winced so much with the opening lines about Sept. 11, then the final scene in an airport... Ugh! So cheesy! "In a post 9/11 world, what we need is a British Christmas movie about various shallow forms of love." Why!

(3) CHRISTMAS. the characters keep saying things like, "well, it's christmastime, so we need to enact our love now!" WHY! do people actually associate christmas with romance? i imagine for most folks, it's a time to hang out with your family. it can be magical in a kind of child-like sense. but in the movie it's framed as some sort of special day when you have to tell a random person you've never talked to before that you love them, the end.


I did like the plot line with the aging rock star. He hit just the right note. Otherwise... yick.

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"Disgusted"?lol you sound like an idiot

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That's a wee bit harsh. I wanted to like or even love this film too, but ended up very disappointed. The cast of talented, established, and very popular stars, and so many of them, sets you up to expect so much.

There were just too many story-lines. The Emma/Alan marriage deserved to be more than just one of 8 or 10 co-stories.

It just ended up feeling like a contrivance. A way to have a major block party of British stars.

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I think the Prime Minister and the tea lady is meant to be real love, likewise Colin Firth and the Portuguese girl. And the two stand ins for the porno movie, they seem to be quite likely to have a lasting relationship. And the American girl is with her brother, who seems to be the person she loves most. And the has been rockmstar discovers his manager is the person he loves most. I agree the stepfather/stepson thing is weird though. I am not sure what we are meant to make of Alan Rickman, his affair seems half-hearted at best. But with some of the stories, I think you can see real love.

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I agree with louiseculmer 100%.

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I don't. I think she was being facetious. I hate this movie, Not in the sense I wouldn't watch it, but there is so much cheese, it's hard to swallow.


I'm not a woman much less Deanna Durbin, but the old-time glam-shot appeals to me.

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Sometimes a little cheese is good. Cheese is what makes this movie so fun.

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I'm glad you feel this way. It is not my intention to diminish anyone else's enjoyment.
I did like the Rickman / Thompson relationship, although it was heart-breaking. As for the rest, I kind of agree with the next post below, if I recall correctely.

I'm not a woman much less Deanna Durbin, but the old-time glam-shot appeals to me.

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if that's in reference to me, i was certainly not being facetious. Don't know why you would have thought i was. Are you sure you know what 'facetious' means?

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I probably got the thread wrong. I think I know what facetious means. I did go to college as an English major. So I guess facetious means, "about the face." Haha.
But all the best to you and yours.

I'm not a woman much less Deanna Durbin, but the old-time glam-shot appeals to me.

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The first time I watched this movie was a few years ago. I found it mediocre. Initially I thought it was reasonably entertaining but I also found it frustrating and contrived. Fortunately, I know what great, fulfilling love is, that is precisely why I think this movie failed to show the best aspects of a long term, deep, romantic, commited love. After watching it two more times, my perception of Love Actually has not improved. The second time (about two years ago) I decided I was never going to watch it again. Today, we thought that we may have been too harsh in the past, so my spouse and decided to see it again with an open mind; we did that and by the end of it we were fairly dissatisfied and almost angry. I have come to the realisation that there is almost nothing redeemable about this film. Not even those 'funny' moments can save this movie. I have analysed many aspects of it and I can't help but agree with most of the 'hate reviews'. I don't actually hate this movie but I dislike it very much. I think Love Actually sends the wrong message. This movie isn't really about love, most of it is about deceit, superficiality, infatuation, and blatant stupidity.


🎄 Vulgarity is no substitute for Wit- Violet, Dowager Countess of Grantham

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[deleted]

i don't agree. i think several of the stories do show people who are in, or embarking on, deep and satisfying relationships. it is an uneven film, but then a film with many different storylines is inevitably going to be.

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THANK YOU. I'm glad someone agrees with me instead of just calling me an "idiot." I don't even normally comment on movies I don't like, but this one is so empty, vapid, disappointing, and awful... I think ultimately I just hated that it bears nothing in common with my own understanding of "love." And the cheesy Christmas & Sept. 11 stuff just put it over the top.

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Idiots always need idiot friends.

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And calling people names for having an opinion that differs from yours makes you... what? A genius?

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For the record, I don't think you're an idiot. Every time I watch this movie, I swear I skip through more and more. I'm pretty sure that, eventually, it'll take me about 3 minutes to get through it. And it only gets more annoying with age.

Now, about someone calling you an idiot. Again, I don't agree. BUT...I had to laugh because, I mean, your handle IS "trippycheez". I've been partial to using Velveeta as my handle at times. And I wouldn't say that Velveeta necessarily conveys the fact I am indeed NOT AT ALL an idiot (which I'm not). And, since Velveeta is, in fact, a trippy cheese, well...you get the idea. OK, now I DO sound like an idiot.

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Thank you for your thoughts. My husband really likes this movie, and I really hate it. It is nice to be able to read the opinion of someone who has given it several chances with an open mind each time.

My husband's view is: "You love Doris Day rom-coms and 'Love Actually' is way better than that." But the Day films never pretended to be anything but fun, and proud of it. "Love Actually" bit off way more than it could chew.

I think if they could have picked three of the stories, and tied them together somehow, it might have worked quite well.

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I think it was to show a broad range of love, all types of what we consider love, not just consummate love, but empty love, romantic love, infatuation, friendship, familial love and all the rest, good and bad. Christmastime IS a season where we try to express love for all, love and forgiveness and acceptance. I think the movie did a splendid job.

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I'm also surprised by how disgusted you were by the movie.

Is there possibility that you're just an idiot?

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Lighten up. It's a movie; a smorgasbord of vignettes about couples at Christmastime.

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I think the movie was trying to illustrate the different kinds of love, through the different sets of characters. Let me try a few:

Billy Mack and his "Fat Manager:" Love borne of solid friendship, like brotherly love. I'm convinced they were not gay. They realized that they really were like family. Like brothers.

Jamie and his Portuguese girlfriend: True love, borne of appreciation after betrayal and learning what's really important.

Daniel (Liam Neeson) - Moving On love, though I really didn't enjoy that one, either. Too fast.

Karen & Harry - Long-term love that has faded due to lack of care and taking it for granted.

Colin and his American bimbos - Sexual love and virtually nothing else.

John and Just Judy - Love that begins with friendship and respect, even in the oddest of situations.

Mark for Juliet: Unrequited love.

Natalie and The Prime Minister: Love across class lines.

Sarah for her disabled brother: Love for family, especially when they really need you.

Sam and his girlfriend: Young love/puppy love.

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Well said. OP's idea of true love must be Titanic or something

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As with many here, I simply cannot fathom someone not seeing the clear and deliberate portrayal of all sorts of 'LOVE'. Many described in okerry-1's list.

But also of Sam accepting and trusting in Daniel as his parent.

Billy Mack and his manager were not gay - their lives had been intertwined and interdependent for so long they didn't realize how much a part of each others' lives they were.

That sex is separate from love - with John and Just Judy - they were having sex as strangers and their friendship and love had to develop completely apart from that.

That love is at times unplanned and awkward as with Natalie and the PM.

About choosing love - Sarah and her brother's need versus her and Karl. Sometimes love is largely passion and romance...but it can also be a harsh obligation to do what your heart tells you you must do.

So many nuances here - obviously this is a film in which you have to accept some latitude to weave all of these situations together. I do believe all of the forms of love portrayed are real - and seldom put together on one plate to ponder and empathize with...

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You must be fun to be around.

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There's not just ONE type of love on show, but rather MANY types of love. It's a film about romantic love, platonic love, sibling love, parental love, betrayed love, chaste love, lustful love, grieving love, unfulfilled love and infatuated love.

Although the movie ends on a positive note and is obviously primarily feel-good in tone, it explores the dark side of love too. It's love which humiliates Emma Thompson, and has left Liam Neeson's character in agony (but it's through another kind of love that they find the strength to go on).

It also hints that adultery can be seen differently, depending on your perspective. Adultery is depicted as sordid when it's Alan Rickman and Heike Makatsch, but sweet when you see a hint of it (and perhaps the seed of more) between Keira Knightley and Andrew Lincoln.

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I am also surprised how disgusted you were, OP!
I don't know what you were expecting to watch, some sort of grand "love conquers all" film about true love? A plain rom-com where the girl gets the boy?

The fact that people have to tell you there are many types of love and not just one great love, and that that's what the film is telling us, is astonishing. Don't you know that? Love isn't one thing, it's many..

All of the characters did experience love, in different ways. From platonic friendship love to unrequited love. It wasn't only about infatuation or having a crush,it was love.
How this very simple message went beyond your head is truly staggering.

Besides that, it manages to be opposites. Funny and cynical, sweet and bitter sweet, heart-warming and heart-breaking, and so on. It isn't only sunshine and roses.


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I agree with Trippy Cheese 100%.

I would add that getting back together just because it's Christmas is something my childish sister would do.

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I completely agree with you about how terrible this movie is at heart. (Strange for a movie that's supposedly about "love").

Here's a link -- I didn't want to repeat myself here, but I listed off a bunch of reasons I find it incredibly sad and sexist:

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0314331/board/nest/249098461?d=258418584#258418584

Cheers!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I keep thinking I'm a grownup, but I'm not.

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