The best movie ever


No one could say this is, in any shape or form a good movie but, I still loved it, when I wasn’t gob smacked at the totally incoherent plot and ridiculous scenes I was laughing. A IMdb member describing another Seagal masterpiece said of it “one ridiculous scene follows another continuously until the end”, I would say this applies equally to the Foreigner.

My favorite scenes:

Seagal placing a booby trapped package in a deserted train station locker in the middle of nowhere on the odd chance he might need to lure someone there to blow them up.

Seagal placing a booby trapped CD in a derelict house in the middle of nowhere on the odd chance he might need to lure someone there to blow them up.

An important package being left with a really old woman and her two idiot sons (who appear to have had their tongues cut out for no reason whatsoever) in the middle of nowhere.

Small shoebox packages that manage to totally destroy an entire train station, only for the station to re-appear in the morning, just smoldering a bit.

Police putting a massive explosion down to a freak gas explosion.

That innocent guy who gets shot outside a garage in broad daylight just because he happens to be driving Seagals car and wearing his coat.

That government agent booking himself into a hotel under Seagal’s name for no reason other than to have him shoot Seagal’s ex-partner.

That innocent desk clerk who gets shot just because she doesn’t give out a room number and more mysteriously is replaced not a day later with not a word said.

The bad guy who has conveniently left a first aid kit and weapons stash hidden along some river bank in the middle of nowhere on the odd chance he might need it.

Seagal just offing the main government bad guy and a horse and carriage casually going past the next second.

Seagal breaking in to some toff’s house killing half a dozen guards…Seagal breaking into the same house in the same manner not a day later…who would work for him.

Seagal pulling out his flick knife dramatically on approx 4 separate occasions.

Seagal for some unknown reason being unable or unwilling to kill his ex-partner despite killing him in a ridiculously easy fashion 20 seconds to the end.

Seagal’s ex-partner smoking wherever he goes, even when attempting to secretly assassinate someone.

Seagal’s ex-partner breaking an obviously rotten chair to use as a weapon only to be left with a useless rotten chair stump.

Seagal standing by ideally as his ex-partner breaks a chair to use as a weapon in a life and death face off.

The only half good fight in the whole movie being on an escalator.

Guards that are seemingly killed by being thrown in water or tripped up.

Seagal with his willy wonka out jumping through a glass window.

Bad guys placing bombs and announcing to each other every move they make for the benefit of the audience and the guy hiding behind the box.

Bad guys leveling a deserted building in the middle of nowhere to cover up the death of one of their men.

Seagal brother sitting about with lots of goverment men waiting for the phone to ring.

All these are in addition to the usual action movie cheesy one liners, plot holes and convoluted death scenes not to mention the poor stunt work, occasional dubbing and repeated scene footage. How can you not like this…to make movies this poorly takes practice.

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HAHAHA

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Shut up you God damn communist cóck-wallet, Seagal is an action legend whose spectacular work has brought him past the point where he can be questioned by knobhounds like you.

If you don't like him, don't watch him. You know what you're going to get when you watch a Seagal film; an intricate storyline, a quick-paced film, cutting edge fight scenes and masterful delivery of one-liners (as well as some absorbing dialogue).

If you want some sort of cheap, by-the-numbers thrill-fest with awful action scenes, sterile dialogue, zero storyline and terrible stunt doubles then get lost and watch The Dark Knight, The Shawshank Redemption or Full Metal Jacket.

Seagal is in the business of proper, compelling films, he doesn't conform to any tired, mainstream Hollywood templates like the films you'd probably like. Get a grip and appreciate the work he does or else take yourself and your misguided opinions elsewhere.

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You must be the biggest idiot that ever posted on IMDB.

Seagal can NOT act. His movies are TERRIBLE. And why they keep making these I don't know.

How dare you critise great films, you ignorant dumbass.


@frog2077 ROFLOL good post.

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[deleted]

Dr Grater, I thought you were just being sarcastic by comparing Mr Seagal's work with those other movies you mention, but then I tried reading more comments of yours for extra amusement and it turns out that you were serious!

I can only say this: wow.



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Of course I was serious.Film discussion boards hold no place for people who do not respect the thespian splendour of Seagal. Without doubt the best actor of his generation.

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The original poster forgot about Dunoir sneaking into the building and killing a maid for no reason before giving away a gun to minders.

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Agree 100%! Hilarious film in every way.

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OP is pretty much my hero.

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I actually thought it was much better than the other recent crap from Seagal (starting from Exit Wounds, Half-Past Dead, Flight something... etc.)
But I agree 100% - it's the ridiculousness of the stories and dorkiness of their progression in his movies that make them so strangely entertaining.

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