MovieChat Forums > Far from Heaven (2003) Discussion > I feel NO sympathy

I feel NO sympathy

posted 19 years ago by inklingatthetradingposts
51 replies | jump to latest

i suppose i'm supposed to feel a little sorry for dennis quaid's character, after all, he is a homosexual in a time when it's illegal and definatly not something you come out with and tell other people about, but i don't feel anyhting for him.

he's a jerkwad through and through, he's not a good person at all, i don't see one redeeming quality in him that would make me feel sorry for him and sympathize with his situation.

it's his own damn fault that his life is so screwed up, i know that he married cathy because he thought it was what he was supposed to do, but just because he's in a marrige he shouldn't be in doesnt mean that he can go out and screw a bunch of other people. it doesn't matter if they're male or female, he's still being unfaithful and probably bringing all sorts of diseases home to his wife every time he kisses her.

he does nothing to help his wife, he doesnt try to help himself (no, i don't see homosexuality as a disease, but thats what it was in the 50's so he should have put more effort into getting cured), and even has sex with random guys in miami, which was a really creepy scene, by the way.

overall, i just see him as a giant *beep* sknkhead, i'm pro gay rights, and i hope it's leagalized here soon, i think debate is beginning tomorrow as a matter of fact, but i just really hate this guy, he has nothing good going for him (aside from the fact that he's dennis quaid, and looks freaking awsome with a shirt off).

i agree with ironbutterfly, he is the villian, he ruined everything.
inkl

Don't Panic (Hey, look at me! I have a signature now!)

[–] 19 years ago

[deleted]

[–] inklingatthetradingposts 19 years ago

just plain creepy, plus the fact that the other guy was 19 at the most, i swear. it was just plain sleezy.

was he the one frank ended up with at the end? there was a shot of the hotel room, and i could see blonde hair in the back, but i didn't get a good look at him.
inkl

Don't Panic (Hey, look at me! I have a signature now!)

[–] 19 years ago

[deleted]

[–] Neelis 19 years ago

was he the one frank ended up with at the end? there was a shot of the hotel room, and i could see blonde hair in the back, but i didn't get a good look at him.

Yes. He is simply credited as the blond boy, but it's the same guy as in Miami. It is that guy who started the divorce, after all: Frank tells Cathy he has fallen in love with someone who wants to live with him. He is talking about the guy from the hotel, who gives him looks at the pool, at dinner and finally sneaks up after Frank to his and Cathy's hotel room.

I'm not sure if I could feel for Frank. I do understand his situation, but the way he was acting (towards Cathy especially) didn't create a real moment that you could actually start caring for him. When he slaps Cathy (before the holiday) it even gets worse: she loves him truly, and he cannot answer her love, does not know how to do such a thing. His only way of responding seems to be violence and alcohol.

But to understand all this you will have to go beyond the surface: Look at the family of Cathy and Frank: these children are not being brought up under the best conditions. Now imagine how it must have been like for Frank to grow up, at least twenty years earlier, perhaps having faced World War One, but certainly World War Two. How must his father have been? And his mother? Shouldn't there be a reason why he can't show his love and affection for the children? They are his, after all, gay or not.

When you come to think of it, Frank is not just the agressor or the villain: he's a victim of the system as well, just like all other characters are victims. That is the way they are portrait. They are victims... but they do have a choice.

[–] SupremeCourt3 19 years ago

If Cathy were willing to do it doggy style, Frank might be happier.

"I'm not a woman, I'm a force of nature."

[–] gorgsharpy 19 years ago

Did you wonder whether Quaid's going against the flow actually inspired Moore to do the same ?

I would have liked an ending where she actually wound up understanding Quaid, because they were both following their emotions contrary to society norms.

Otherwise a little too neat a film for me.

[–] gaelicguy 18 years ago

This is a great point, gorgsharpy. I think Cathy has the insight and the capability to do just that -- and, yes, too neat is perfect way to describe the film. If this was an homage to Douglas Sirk, I'd say for all of their glitz and glamor, at least his films followed a good narrative, engaged the audience and were very moving.

This just left me cold and what a waste of Julianne Moore and Dennis Haysbert.

Give thanks for a little and you will find a lot.

[–] ijonesiii 18 years ago

I believe the screenplay attempts to paint Frank in a sympathetic light, but it's hard to feel sympathetic for this man who has been living a lie from jump and been lying to Cathy all these years. I could understand a little better if when he and Cathy first discussed marriage, he had been honest about having feelings for men, saying 'This is the way I am...but I would like to change and if you can handle that, then maybe we can talk about getting married' but it is clear from the story we saw that Cathy knew nothing of Frank's attraction to men and therefore it is impossible to sympathize with him when he gets caught. If he had been as honest with Cathy before they married as he was when he got caught, things might have been different.

[–] xxmoeuxx 18 years ago

It's totally implausible to think that Frank would sit down with Cathy before their marriage and say he has feelings for me. This is the 50's!! The whole idea of homosexuality is taboo. They thought that it was something that could be cured for goodness sake.

[–] ijonesiii 18 years ago

OK, Frank sitting down with Cathy before their marriage would not be plausible in the 50's then how are we supposed to feel any sympathy for him now, which I think was the original point of this thread. He lied to her from the beginning, so why should we feel any sympathy for him?

[–] traffik 18 years ago

He was scared. I did feel sympathy for him. The 50's were a brutal time. I felt sympathy for both Cathy and Frank. Cathy because her life collapses and all her fake friends drop her and Frank because he lives a lie. I do however think the fact that he is together with the pool boy is a bit weird. That seems like pure lust instead of love.

[–] ijonesiii 18 years ago

I would agree that Frank's tryst with the pool boy was lust, not love.

[–] cythna 18 years ago

Well it's hard to judge because we don't see them have a single conversation. If you hadn't heard Cathy and Raymond speaking you might think that was only lust as well. I did feel sympathy for Frank, until the moment he turned on Cathy because SHE was causing scandel. He was so quick to judge her, and so condeming, that I lost all sympathy for him at that point.

[–] velcronewsletter 17 years ago

part of it wasn't his fault becuase of the expectation of men at the time. but the way he handled the whole situation just annoyed me

------------------------
OOOOH MATRON!

[–] taje 17 years ago

IMO Frank wasn't even the 'victim' here to be sympathetic with. Frank went on with his life. He came out. But yes Frank did pity Cathy and in a way was doing Cathy a favor too. She is much better without Frank

[–] PinstripeLove 17 years ago

i agree i think he is horrible to cathy throghtout he swears at her and slaps her in the face and is really moody with her i no he is goin through his own stuff but he never considers what a blow it is for cathy and then he even has a go at her for being seen with a black guy coz she gets seen with a black guy when he is gay which was seen even worse im pro gay but i think he is quite selfish

***payton:and when it comes to it you cant even breathe!***

[–] soulthinker 17 years ago

His character is a villian. Also,it brings proof that gays stood by and did nonething when it comes to race. The equation of gay and interracial straight relationships is different from night and day.

[–] Isaac5855 17 years ago

I don'tthink we're supposed to feel sorry for Frank...I think the screenplay definitely sets up Cathy as the victim to whom our sympathies should drift.

[–] inklingatthetradingposts 17 years ago

I can see some people feeling sorry for Frank simply because he's a gay man in a homophobic time, but he's such an unsympathetic person, I couldn't whip up any sympathy for him.

s'all for now
inkl

[–] preciousbunnie 16 years ago

I understand your point, but I can't help but to feel sympathy for Frank Whitaker close to the end of the film. He thought that his feelings for men would pass, but it came back to haunt him when he went with Cathy to Miami...

I feel sympathy because he clearly didn't WANT to have those feelings...he'd rather stay with his wife and kids...but he couldn't help but to feel that way, and he knew he couldn't deny it any longer.

I'm not putting Frank on a pedestal or anything...I didn't like his character...but at least he didn't live the rest of his life pretending...

"It's gonna happen. All the people who change the world die in violence" 2Pac

[–] WhiteTigerJaide 16 years ago

I didnt see him as homosexual. After all, he was able ot get firm and inpregnate a woman. How can you be gay, and do that? I saw him as someone bisexual, who had stronger feelings for men, and gave into exploring them, while being married. In my opinion, the movie made it seem like after he went to the movie theater, and saw the gay men going into the privarte bar, it was THEN that be became allured into that lifestyle. And then after that, drawn in. He should have controled himself, seeing he was married, committed and had two beautiful children. But he had no self control or self respect.
I do not have any sympathy for his character either, but whats worse is his wife trying to act like nothing had happened to keep it together. His butt needed to be kicked to the curb

Life is like a wheel everything will change

[–] 16 years ago

[deleted]

[–] WhiteTigerJaide 16 years ago

How can a homosexual man get an erection with a woman? If you are truly GAY you will not be able to function with a woman. When someone has sex with women, but prefers men, they are bisexual. A real homosexual man would be too repulsed to ever get his penis into a woman.

Life is like a wheel everything will change

[–] preciousbunnie 16 years ago

I don't agree with that. I feel that Frank was always gay, but concealed his feelings for the sake of his reputation. And then when he noticed how other men accepted their true identities, he took that as a sign to finally pursue his desired lifestyle.

And it is possible for a gay man to get an erection with a woman without truly desiring her.

"It's gonna happen. All the people who change the world die in violence" 2Pac

[–] maisonvivante 16 years ago

That's absolutely absurd. A gay man can get erect with a woman.

[–] 16 years ago

[deleted]

[–] gogiggs 16 years ago

That's just silly.

Plenty of gay men have married and fathered children. Plenty of straight men can get hard to have sex with men in situations where no women are available. Plenty of straight men can get hard to have sex with women that they don't really find attractive.

[–] ilovetati 13 years ago

That's not true, there are ways of forcing arousal.

The trees, like lungs, filling with air.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7RQVDqaV6OI

[–] preciousbunnie 16 years ago

I agree with you 100%.

"It's gonna happen. All the people who change the world die in violence" 2Pac