How many people visit this page?
Quick survey, respond in the appropriate manner.
To Me
"Hey, deadhead. Take a bite of peach." - Tim Bisley
I do, but there's never anyone here. It's a shame no-one appreciates such high-class comedy.
To You
Everybody loves the Marx brothers but refuses to acknowledge that the Chuckle brothers are funnier with better mustaches and much more ladder based comedy.
To Me
"Hey, deadhead. Take a bite of peach." - Tim Bisley
The Marx Brothers are nothing compared to Paul and Barry. Same goes for Charlie Chaplin - his moustache is just feeble. The Chuckle brothers genius relies in their ability to take one simple but hilarious concept (the ladder) and do it over and over again, without ever seeming repetitive.
To You
The Chuckle brothers dwarf the tache ratings of any and everybody except Stalin and that chap on the WW2 recruiting posters. I have a plan for a version of changing rooms with the Brothers Chuckle where they go round someones house, smash it up and beat the occupants with ladders, planks and long metal pipes.
To Me
"Hey, deadhead. Take a bite of peach." - Tim Bisley
Brilliant idea. I would certainly volunteer to be on that show. Why have the chuckle brothers destroying sets and injuring extras when they can do it to real people?
On the subject of moustaches, whose is better, Paul's or Barry's?
To You
I think Paul has the edge when it comes to the tache. I also plan to write a feature length film about their exploits which I will try to sell to Universal. Oh and when will we get Christmas Day moved to the 24th of December to celebrate the birth of Paul and Barry?
To Me
"Hey, deadhead. Take a bite of peach." - Tim Bisley
A feature length film would be brilliant - think how much destruction they could do in that amount of time, they would destroy the world. Perhaps the last scene could be them passing an armed nuclear bomb back and forth as it counts down.
Christmas should definitely be changed - the Chuckle brothers are far funnier than jesus.
To You
I like the nuke idea, I will try to add it to my script. I'm currently trying to think of a name for the film, my current favourite is "A Ladder to Heaven"
To Me
"Hey, deadhead. Take a bite of peach." - Tim Bisley
'A Ladder to Heaven' is an excellent title, although it's a difficult choice between that and the obvious 'To Me, To You'.
Ch-ch-chucklevision,
Ch-chucklevision,
Ch-ch-chucklevision!
To You
The problem with To Me, To You is it might be confused with their gameshow which is not related to the film.
Oh dear
To Me
"Hey, deadhead. Take a bite of peach." - Tim Bisley
Yes the game show wasn't that great, mainly because it involved lots of children, and not enough destruction and mayhem. We could just use it as the tagline for the film.
Oh dear oh dear
To You
The kids were bad because a ladder over the shoulder was too high to clock em with. I do have plans in the script for a scene to take place in the back garden of a house where paul and barry have been hired as window cleaners. There will be a child on a trampoline and as he reaches the apex of his jump Paul shall turn around with a ladder smashing the child off the trampoline and when the mother notices her unconcious child Paul and Barry explain the dangers of trampolining.
Oh dear oh dear oh dear
To Me
"Hey, deadhead. Take a bite of peach." - Tim Bisley
I love the trampoline idea. The tension could be built up by having the ladder go under the child a few times in a near miss.
Perhaps the film could borrow a plot device from 'Speed' - the Chuckle brothers have to carry a ladder around, and if they ever drop it or put it down, it explodes. Also they have to pass it between one another at regular intervals.
Oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear
To You
Love the trampoline idea as it shows excellent potential for comic sound effects. The speed idea is also good but might be a challenge to work into the plot. There will obviously be a moment involving a priceless ming vase and possibly a similar one with a vial of anthrax.
Oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear
To Me
"Hey, deadhead. Take a bite of peach." - Tim Bisley
It would be difficult to work the speed idea into the plot, but it's not as if their plots are normally that believable. Priceless ming vase is an absolute must, but I don't see how a vial of anthrax scene could end with them still alive.
Oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear
To You
They could be in protective biohazard suits surrounded by many unprotected old people and toddlers. Your attack on the believability of their plots is unworthy of you, they are far more realistic than others kids programmes like newsround or blue peter.
Oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear
To Me
"Hey, deadhead. Take a bite of peach." - Tim Bisley
I like the biohazard suits idea, although it gets rid of the risk to them. Maybe they could be on a train or something and end up throwing it out the window.
I apologize for my attack on their plausibility - of course there plots always make sense. I completely agree with you about blue peter - that big blue ship is so fake.
Oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear
To You
The train idea is very good or maybe even a hot air balloon, the balloon could be going over a packed public place and after the vial is dropped we see everyone on the ground just collapse.
Oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear
To Me
"Hey, deadhead. Take a bite of peach." - Tim Bisley
I agree, hot air balloon is brilliant. Not only do we see the people dying, but this leads to a classic 'oh dear' scene between the brothers. Plus, there are some many hilarious possibilities in a balloon, many involving nearly falling out.
Oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear
To You
I love the idea of nearly falling out and of course we would need to work a ladder into the basket so they could swing it wildly. Possibly the burner can also be used to ignite one of their mustaches with hilarious consequences.
Oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear
To Me
"Hey, deadhead. Take a bite of peach." - Tim Bisley
The burner is an excellent idea - but why leave at just one moustache? The ladder goes without saying, wherever they are. Here, each time they spin it around, they will snap one of the ropes tying the basket to the balloon, until they are left hanging by just one.
Oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear
To You
I prefer leaving two diagonally opposite ropes in tact so they have to carry out a complex balancing act to avoid falling out. Then they need to turn the burner down in order to can land so they stand the ladder up in the basket and both must climb up the ladder from their own side. Then Barry will accidentally turn the burner higher blasting both in the face and setting taches alight. Then they must land the balloon while trying to put their mustaches out in a calm manner so they don't upset the basket.
Oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear
To Me
"Hey, deadhead. Take a bite of peach." - Tim Bisley
Then of course we could have a scene in which they are throwing ballast from one side of the basket to the other, in an attempt to keep it balanced. Finally, as the balloon is nearing the ground, they could completely unbalance the basket, but luckily it starts spinning over and over fast enough so that the centrifugal force stops them falling out.
Oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear
To You
The ballast could be in the form of custard pies and when the balloon starts spinning they get completely coated and emerge covered in custard. Then Mr. No Slacking would shout at them for treading custard all over his garden and demand they clean it up before the Duchess arrives for tea and he would tell them to do it with "No slacking". He would then slip on the custard and get it all over his suit.
Oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear
To Me
"Hey, deadhead. Take a bite of peach." - Tim Bisley
Brilliant. The script is coming along nicely. We have a scene in a garden with a trampoline and ladder (lots of potential for breaking windows as well), a scene with a priceless ming vase, a long scene on a balloon with anthrax, and possibly a finale with a nuclear weapon. All we need now is a way to tie them together, and possibly a few more ladder scenes.
Oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear
To You
The chuckle brothers are ordered to clean the house of Mr. No Slacking before the Duchess arrives for tea. Mr. No Slacking tells them to mind his priceless ming vase. They have several near misses and Barry decides to protect the vase by tying several helium balloons to it so it would float gently to the floor. He ties to many to the vase and it floats out the window. Paul and Barry chase it and notice it has caught on the roof of a house. They pretend to be window cleaners in order to get access. Then we have the garden trampoline scene, they climb the ladder but the vase gets free and floats off. They then have a hilarious scene where they bump into a postman and accidentally pick up one of the packages he is carrying. The package is addressed to Tony Blair and we see an Iraqi postage stamp. They steal a hot air balloon to chase the vase. While in the balloon they open the package to find the vial. The balloon scene follows. They land in the garden of Mr. No Slacking with his vase. He yells at them and then Barry drops the vase. The brothers run from an angry Mr. No Slacking and take shelter on a military base where they find the nuke.
Oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear
To Me
"Hey, deadhead. Take a bite of peach." - Tim Bisley
Stunning. Are you sure you don't write the scripts for the actual program? Just one question, does the nuke explode, do they diffuse it or dispose of it in a way that doesn't hurt them? I think the film should end with a fade out as they are continually tossing the nuke back and forth, combining 'oh dears' with 'to me to yous'
Oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear
To You
I was thinking of the fade out ending as it leaves it a cliffhanger for the inevitable sequel. Ideally we would make a trilogy of films, with the second one being a prequel to the first so the third also has people coming to see the resolution of the first film.
Oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear
To Me
"Hey, deadhead. Take a bite of peach." - Tim Bisley