Part of me sympathizes with him, as he did apparently try to resist her for a bit, and she clearly did need some attention. But on the other hand, his behavior from the beginning could be seen as quietly predatory. And he does basically rape her at the end. (I mean, how do you not know about foreplay at his age?)
So was he an ass all along, or simplify a literary poser who got sucked into something inappropriate?
Most people argue that he was. Personally, I feel that he fits more in as the literary poser who goes too far than as a calculating predator. I think he was genuinely interested in Meg's writing and that, combined with his need to be admired, her need for support, and their mutual isolation, led him to seek her out as a mentee. Do I think he was physically attracted to her right from the start? Yeah, probably, though he may not have fully realized the extent of this attraction. I think, however, that their relationship started out as mostly an intellectual one, and as the two grew closer and more emotionally invested, his feelings shifted towards a sexual desire for her. I believe he honestly tried to hold himself back and that he really wanted her to desire him as much as he did her. He welcomed the attention and admiration, a nice contrast to his dead end career as a writer and his inadequacies as a husband. That she was young and beautiful was probably not incidental, but I don't think his primary objective was to sleep with her.
Many people point to his "novel" as evidence that he had been grooming her all along to ultimately land her in the sack. I disagree. Meg is actually the one who first brings up the novel and his initial response is "What novel?" But then she adds that her friend had told her about it and he was too embarrassed to admit that it wasn't true. After all, he was her writing coach and he didn't want to lose her respect.
What he did was disgusting and irresponsible, but I don't think it was the outcome he had planned when he first sought her out.
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Trust me, I'm a doctor.
Sorry but you're kind of falling for his grooming just like she did. :/ I'll admit I wasn't sure at first either, and was hoping he wouldn't turn out to be a creep. But, by the end, it was black and white to me. Yes he was grooming her all along. I felt he was barely even trying after the sex to keep up the charade, like he didn't even completely care if she figured it out (because he never really cared about her feelings) but put the stupid blue car on the chair tomorrow falsely thinking that stupid gesture would be all it'd take for her to still be "aww" enamored by their little (fake) "bond" of before, like she'd just be okay with everything as if nothing happened, his true colors hadn't been revealed. Yuck.
And yes, sure, she brought the novel thing up. I don't think that was the only proof of him being a predator, it was just an early hint (b/c I guessed he was faking there) that he was not as genuine as he was coming across to her, and was trying to impress her. I was still trying to give him a chance...maybe he was just an insecure old man trying to get his ego stroked...but his behavior from the hotel room scene and on cinched the deal. Just a game he plays to get sex from vulnerable students.
This was not ever a deep emotional or intellectual bond. It was just grooming.
Ew, I even think that stupid quote he chose to put up on the blackboard (after she nuzzled him) and his little standoffish behavior was all part of his stupid game too. What did the board say, something about "you have no idea the pain of the man who comforts"...like some woe is me BS, hinting to her he's in paaain and all this to rope her in even more. Like poor tormented man. But understand it was all part of the GAME. God makes me sick haha!
maybe I see it clearer because I had close experience with someone who was very much like this, a teacher. I wasn't the 'prey' but someone close to me was so I was able to more objectively see how the whole thing played out.
Honestly, I'm so glad to see people so cynical about the guy's intentions. In real life, people excuses these cases all the time. There's a huge taboo, but when push comes to shove, many often support the perpetrators over the victims.
I think it is arguable that he wasn't consciously trying to seduce his student from the beginning. He's a damaged man, probably justifying his behavior through the grief he felt when his child died. I even think he believed he was in love with the girl. However, he sought her out. He continually approached her, asked about her absent father (yeah, he's probably her father's age if not older). His talk about his personal grief also formed a bond and created sympathy in her. I'm sure he was genuinely distraught about his child, but it all contributed to making her dependent on him.
So, sure, he didn't come up with the idea to lie about his book. He sort of fudged it when she brought it up and didn't tell the truth, but only sort of lied. I agree that the wife's behavior seemed to indicate that this behavior was familiar. She appeared to feel sorry for the girl, though she herself was a mess, probably through trauma and living in such a terrible marriage. Whatever the case, the guy is certainly self-deluded and completely inconsiderate when it came to the bedroom. It wasn't comfortable or consensual in the least, no matter what she said. It was all about him.
Yes, yes, yes. Gross old guy was grooming her all along. Notice how even half-assed his oh so deep wisdom and support gets right after he had sex with her. With a smirk, "Make me proud tomorrow! Oh uh, I mean. you. and fame will follow." Like since when was she supposed to care about fame? It was so phoney and fake, but he was just placating her and not even trying that hard at all to seem so sage and wise (like before), because he didn't care anymore, he had gotten what he wanted. Even his "old man has sex with young lady and is transformed by it!" Seemed sort of sarcastic. I felt he was actually pretty obvious about it. How little he cared about all that "deep" stuff right after he got what he wanted. The blue car the next day was just to keep her under his thumb, thinking she was still dumb enough to be his little pet and go along with it, not cause a ruckus.
Don't be fooled. I mean, trust me, I was actually hoping that he wasn't going to turn out to be a jerk who was grooming her all along. But that was quite obvious by the end.
And yes he was "resisting" her at first...but I feel that was 1) part of his game, getting her to trust him 2) also feeling her out, seeing if it'd be "safe" for him to move in on her 3) didn't want to do it in that setting, but wait till it was a non-school area, actually just another state, far away, controlled environment (hotel room) where he wouldn't have a risk of being caught.
He turned out just to be a classic predator who finds vulnerable/lost/unhappy youngsters and preys upon it by being all nice, supportive, stable parental figure they don't have, maybe even a romantic type figure.
The wife crying at the beach, like she'd seen this all before (and her comment "Oh I bet MEG would love to go swimming with you" hinting she knew the sexual nature of it too...it was a game.
And her poem at the end confirms this. "Once I read Your Book." Basically, once she knew the truth. Once he got what he wanted (sex), she saw his true colors. It was a sham just to sleep with her, never true concern. Like she said...all fiction, all lies, just a fake outline of a heart. (Yes she's referring to his fake book too but it's just a metaphor.)
YES ASS ALL ALONG. That's how these people operate.