What does this line mean?
When Laurent asks Cedric if he's ever been in love, he says "Life in a couple means lying, and I can't."
I don't understand what he means. Is he talking about cheating, or lying about being gay? Any thoughts?
I think that he means that in order for a relationship to work one has to lie. No matter how honest you want to be, when you are in a committed relationship, you cannot, it's just not possible. If you were completely honest, there would be truths that your spouse could not deal with. I mean, you don't tell your significant other that they are overweight. You lie to them, but you do it out of love. Understanding love is understanding compromise. Does that make sense?
Someone has to die in order that the rest of us should value life more. It's contrast.
That makes sense. They make such a cute couple. I wish they'd make a sequel!
shareOh, I would love a sequel!
And personally, I tended to think Cedric was talking about a closeted relationship or a straight one when he's actually gay, and that's why he said he's never been in one, because whether to a girlfriend or the outside world, he's never been able to lie, not regarding his feelings.
I used to have a , but damnit do I want a !share
You lie to them, but you do it out of love. Understanding love is understanding compromise.
I agree with jman09 wholeheartedly. We often see that Cedric has inherited his mother's inability to 'pretend'. When he first meets Laurent he tells him how it is, straight up, and does so for the rest of the movie. THAT'S what Cedric is talking about, imo. In the past he has had relationships that haven't worked because he could not coddle his partner, and tell them what they wanted to hear. He told them what he really thought. It caused rifts between he and Laurent, but it goes to show that the couple were special because - as we see in that scene in the car, and Cedric apologising, and 'je'taime' - Cedric was willing to change.
hey, little one. you understand your part in all this?
"In the past he has had relationships that haven't worked because he could not coddle his partner, and tell them what they wanted to hear. He told them what he really thought. It caused rifts between he and Laurent, but it goes to show that the couple were special because - as we see in that scene in the car, and Cedric apologising, and 'je'taime' - Cedric was willing to change."
IMO,the rifts weren't caused by Cedric's honesty and integrity, but by Laurent's lack thereof. He's the one who needed to apologize and be willing to change. The fact that he did finally grow a set and confront his parents at the end partially redeemed him, but I really wanted more out of him in the car scene. I needed him to say, "No, you've been nothing but good to me, and I'm the one who hurt you. I'm so sorry." And I wanted him to tell Cedric that he loved him. Apart from his childish whining and pouting, the thing I disliked about Laurent the most was the fact that he was all take and no give.
Come on, Nyte-Flyer! Cedric is substantially older and (ostensibly) more mature than Laurent. He insists he can't love a man who isn't totally open about his sexuality, which hasn't worked out so well for him. So he's not dating men any more; he's sitting home waiting for twink interns he can make a pass at. He talks big about having come out to Emma, but it is clear he never had the courage to come out to his father, and that he only came out to Emma after his father died and she was emotionally enfeebled. But 'nevermind' - Laurent should just march home to both his homophobic (as he knows from experience) parents and flash his lavender Calvin Kleins at them.
As Emma tells us, Cedric has had a series of failed relationships (apparently due to his inability to distinguish stubbornness from "honesty"). He's isolated and embittered - an aging florist living in his mother's garden shed! So she (the woman who 'doesn't know how to lie') resorts to massive deception to lure Cedric home from Paris (where he was a. attending an imaginary symposium, b. strolling the quais/visiting the Louvre to clear his head, or c. maturely boozing and whoring to dowse his anger?). When Laurent wakes up, grabs his duffel and heads for the train station, Cedric, as usual, grabs his . . . well, okay, his cigarette . . . for the habitual self-gratification.
But, to his credit, Cedric wakes up too, stubs the butt and goes after Laurent. In the car he finally realizes that mother knows best - love sometimes means bending your 'principles' [maybe even 'having to say you're sorry,' gawd help us]. As soon as he understands and acts on that, he finds the Laurent he wanted all along, and it's happily ever after time. [I just hope Laurent gets a few good years of lovin' out of Cedric before it's Rogaine/Fixodent/Depends time for the old guy.]
At least that's another way of looking at it. Cheers!
"Nothing personal. Your name just happened to come up."
I enjoyed reading your "other side of the coin" Leftbanker. I also agree that Cedric was too unyielding and wasn't patient enough to let Laurent work his way through his issues at his own pace. However, I still feel that Laurent was all take and no give and that he showed zero regard for Cedric's feelings throughout. He also ruthlessly used his roommate as the door to his personal closet in spite of knowing full well that she had feelings for him. Laurent wasn't a nice person and I didn't find him likable on any level. The first moment I felt a shred of empathy/sympathy for Laurent was in the car when he cried in Cedric's arms, whereas I very much felt Cedric's pain at being treated like a non-person by the guy he loved.
Perhaps it's a matter of who we each identify with in the movie. Perhaps it's just that I'm an insufferable romantic who believes love should never be denied or hidden away in shame. (Yeah, I know it's sappy, but that's who I am.) Perhaps it's because I'm so proud of my lesbian daughter for standing tall and being herself without shame or apology to anyone -- related to her or not -- in this sad little bible-thumpin', homophobic, southern community we live in....
BTW, now every time I watch the movie, I'm gonna picture Laurent strutting around in front of dear ol' dad in that lavender pair of Calvins you mentioned. Great image!
I agree NyteFlyer; it was not about one man's faults, it was about the two of them meeting in the middle. The fact that they could do that, the fact that their relationship survived, is what makes this such a beautiful movie.
I think it's wonderful that your daughter is proud, and that you are proud of her. I am myself - as a straight woman - very much about gay rights, and gay pride. To us, around supportive people, the idea that people can't be honest about their love is too hard to fathom.
Still, I sympathised with Laurent. The internal battle of loving his parents dearly and not knowing if that will be returned when he tells them - I can only imagine how I would feel losing my family. It would be devestating. I don't think it is easy to say Laurent wasn't a young boy any more, either. Up until he fell in love with Cedric, there had been no reason to speak. I mean, a lot of men get married and have children before they bother to speak up. At least Laurent, in the end, changed his path.
Thank you for your input, I love talking about this movie. One of my all time favourites.
On the inside, I'm a poet. Outside? Shake bad guys, shake.
if you don't mind me asking, somebody_else, who is that a photo of in your avatar (...or whatever it's called)?
just being nosey :-)