MovieChat Forums > The Family Man (2000) Discussion > Did he not have sex because...

Did he not have sex because...


In the scene where Tea Leoni rushes in to the bedroom and interrupts his watching the nightly business report to seduce him, does he choose not to have sex because:

A) He realizes that she thinks she's having sex with the man she's been married to for 13 years and is still in love with and he doesn't want to sully that.

B) He thinks he may have feelings for her and doesn't want to have sex with her until he figures out what they are.

C) Both.

D) Something else.

E) All of the above.

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I think it's B. Also he doesn't want to take advantage of her. She thinks she's sleeping with her husband of 13 years. As much of a player he is he doesn't take advantage of unsuspecting women.

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I think it is C

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[deleted]

None of the three.

He knows she doesn't know who is he and don't wanna take advantage of her.

At least at that point, later he falls in love with her (again), she get to love this new man, and now he knows she loves him (the new one) and doesn't feel is taken advantage now, so can have sex without feeling guilty.

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so by none of the three you mean A?

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lol man! I totally agree!

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You are such a pig - I can't believe you would say that you'd have sex with her (or would have trouble turning it down).
WHO RAISED YOU???!!!
Where do low-life creeps like you come from??
ARE YOU INSANE?!!?

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The post you replied to has been removed, but why would one be a pig if they would have had sex with her? They were once lovers and didn't break up because they weren't getting along, and he's a pig just for saying he'd had trouble turning her down? Also, he was married to her. He may have been in a different timeline, but he was the only Jack.

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it's not a tax deduction.



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When Kate comes back in her lingere, Jack is only pretending to be asleep. After Kate turns out the light, the camera shows his face, and he opens his eyes as if he is in a very serious moment of reflection.

Initially, he is ready to have sex with her. As their kissing becomes more passionate, he suddenly stops and looks at her. He then says, "My God, you're beautiful." After telling her what a beautiful woman she has become, Kate asks, "How can you do that, look at me like you haven't seen me every day for the last 13 years?" When she says this, his expression dramatically changes. I interpreted this as him really hearing his conscience, realizing there would be something unbelievably wrong with taking advantage of her. Along with this, I also wonder if, on a very deep subconscious level, he also truly loves her but he can't quite process this yet.

Even though he comes across as a completely self-serving person at first, this scene reveals, to me, his capacity for thinking about others and not just himself.

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That's what I thought, but that's weird because later on, he is willing to have an affair with that other women, and he doesn't care because he thinks none of it is real. So if he thinks that, why not have some fun with his hot "wife"?!?

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This is a good point, and it further reveals that Jack has a lot to learn. He is still very self-centered and willing take advantage of others. And, even though he tells Arnie the rules don't apply to him because this is not his "real" life, Jack is rationalizing on a couple of different levels. Everything that is happening to him feels absolutely real--to the point that he eventually forgets about Cash and embraces this as his real life and his former life as some kind of dream. So, I think deep down he knows he would still be doing something dishonest and hurtful. This is why Arnie's response to him at the bowling alley is so important and why it makes Jack never go forward with the affair. Even though it is a glimpse, it is real on a certain level.

On another level, Cash tells Jack that his glimpse will last as long as it takes for him to figure things out. He is starting to figure things out, but he doesn't want to give up his old ways so easily. Like most of us, Jack doesn't fully embrace what he is learning about living with integrity right away. It is a slow process, influenced a lot by how Kate treats him with so much love and self-sacrifice--such as when she searches for and buys the suit for him for their anniversary and when she is willing to move back into the city with him.

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[deleted]

No, he was only pretending to be asleep. After she turned off the lights and got in bed, he opened his eyes again.

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What I'd REALLY like to know is why he doesn't want to have sex with her that time but just a few days later he wants to bang her on the stairs. WTF man???? Quick change of mind or what?

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I just thought he was too tired. And after working all day at a crappy job for little money why wouldn't he be? Leave the guy alone and let him sleep.

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I think it was to show that he really meant what he said, and it just wasn't to get her in the sack.

Do not speak- unless it improves on silence.

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maybe she smelled fishy down there

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[deleted]

All of the above. He's confused, of course he wants her, but he's realizing that he loves her and is disoriented because he hasn't known that family life.


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