Ok, I used to claim to be bi, but now I think I'm more geared towards the gay side of bi, lol.
The thing is I like men. They're good-looking, they can be sweet, attractive...blah blah blah. But I dunno if I could have an actual relationship with a guy. Just like I have "bi-curious" mates who like being with women, but couldn't be in an actual relationship with a girl.
Anyone else feel like this?
Luce: Well, I'm gay.
Heck: Mmm... well done.
I am exactly like that. Seriously, it's not even funny...
shareI know. I think it confuses things. Because you like a guy, you kinda get together then you're can't stop looking at women, lol.
Luce: Well, I'm gay.
Heck: Mmm... well done.
Yeah, it sucks, because I've recently become friends with this really great guy. I mean, if I were straight, I would've basically married him by now. He's smart, he's interesting, he's pretty, he's well-dressed, he's funny, and he likes me; but I just can't get into him! *sigh* if only he were a girl...
shareThat's ashame. I know what you mean though. I kissed a male friend of mine. And a lot of people we know think we are destined to be together. And even though he's a really nice, good-looking guy - who I'd probably kiss (just kiss) again, I would never date him. If only he were a girl...
Luce: Well, I'm gay.
Heck: Mmm... well done.
It happens. I know a girl who is sexually attracted to women and not so much for guys. BUT she gets crushes on only men. She could only feel emotionally attracted to a guy. She could never be totally in love with a woman.
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Exactly, so if stright girls can be bi-curious, i.e. can sleep with women feel a connect there...and so on.
Can gay girls be straight-curious? lol.
Luce: Well, I'm gay.
Heck: Mmm... well done.
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so pleased people feel the same as me, i guess you could call me a lesbian who is straight curious, or has straight tendancies :P.
so damn cofusing. after a year of it, it just gets dull not fully knowing who/what you are.
keep posting! its really helpful knowing what other people think about this.
xxxxx
It sounds like your what they call homoflexible,which means you mostly like women but can find the odd man attractive.
shareI wrote the original post AGES ago. And now identify myself as a lesbian.
But recently I've pulled a few guys. Which is weird. I dunno why i do it. Maybe I'm just on the rebound, lol. But my mates find it really weird when I kiss a guy. But they dont find it so strange if my straight girl mates pull girls.
I'm a lil confused right now. Esp since i thought id figured myself out. Apparently not.
www.myspace.com/fallidle
I class myself as bi,but get confused sometimes too.Go with what makes you comfortable.
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If you're not pansexual, or joking, there are some serious double standards there..
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Fair enough. But I do think you know that lesbians exist. Would you say the same about gay guys?
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Are you serious? Have you ever had a gay relationship,if not how do you know you wouldn't like it? Attraction is based on the physical not personality,if you don't find the opposite sex attractive why would you try them out? Being a lesbian means YOU DO NOT WANT TO TRY MEN and why should they when they only like women.Yes lesbians,gays and bisexuals exist so deal with it.
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She said so herself-SHE IS CONFUSED!,that doesn't mean she isn't gay,she could be or she could Bi.
Sexuality isn't black and white,I myself find members of both sexes attractive,but my big brother is gay-he has tried girls in the past(out of confusion and trying to be 'normal') but it just didn't feel right for him,he is soley attracted to men and women hold no sexual interest-he has been in a long term gay relationhip for over 6 yrs.
You should read about the Kinsey scale and other similar studies to understand sexuality better.But homosexuality is a very real reality for at least 10% of the population and a higher percentage for ppl who could be considered bisexual.
I'm Bi so what!
yes, a lot of gay girls are "straight curious" as you put it. haha...
but at that point i think the majority just choose not to be with men.
that's how i am.
Signature.
THE L WORD FOREVER.
Hahahaha, there's another thread here almost exactly like this one.
I'll post here too, because I used to be in your boat, perhaps a year or more ago.
Now I'm gay.
Just plain gay. Men used to interest me, but now, eh, I'm just a big ol' straight-up lezzie.
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"A lie is the truth, until you recognize it as a lie."
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hey this post is similar to one i posted. basically there are times when i think i'm a lesbian. i've never been in a proper relationship with a guy and i find it hard to stay attracted to them. although 90% of the time i go out with them to give them a shot, kinda like pity... weird yes. and kissing them is more like a chore, it's like i'm not into it....
i've had crushes on girls and guys but i don't find guys sexually appealing. like i wouldn't want anything more than a kiss.
i could just be a prude...
my appearance doesn't help either. i look like a real girly girl. even though i'm not girly at all... its like you are only accepted as a lesbian, if you look butch etc.
i'm closeted but i did come out to my friends numerous times when i was drunk but they thought i was kidding and called me a liar and got quite annoyed.
there are times i want to come out but then i do find myself having crushes on guys the odd time. then there are times were i'd try to 'de-gay' myself and tell myself these feelings aren't true. i'm scared in case i'm not gay but i'm convincing myself i'm gay. like pretending to be gay? is that possible?
it's pretty messy...
and it would be hard telling certain people in my life about me hooking up with girls etc cause they'd probably be disgusted and scared that i fancy them etc.
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Some ppl are sure their 100% gay and could never be physically attracted to the opposite sex,it has nothing to do with being closed to the idea,for them it just isn't possible.I find the person attractive,gender for me is irrelevant.
I'm Bi so what!
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I think most people are not 100% anything, yet gay people are usually a lot more open to differing sexuality than *most* straight people. Many gay people (myself included) have tried very hard to be straight, it just doesn't work. The only way I ever was able to sleep with guys was if I got blacked out drunk, and I didn't enjoy it at all and afterwards felt really disgusted by it. I will on occasion kiss a guy now and then still but it's more for attention (hey, at least I admit it) then anything else. Plus I don't view kissing as a super-sexual act - I've kissed all my close friends. Most guys don't believe I'm actually a lesbian..."oh ,you have to be bisexual" because I'm feminine and you could not tell I'm a lesbian at all...but really...I mean...I'm like, "well, think about you would feel about having sex with a guy. that's pretty much what I'd feel about having sex with a guy"
shareI can relate a bit; I'm bi, but I lean more towards men in general. That and one of my ex-girlfriends said she was straight, then bi, then finally a full-fledged lesbian. I think in a way you can kind of fall out of being attracted to men, or women, whatever way you swing.
Kiera
its been a while since i posted my last reply on this thread.
i am bisexual, well, on the lesbian side.
i find both sexes attractive in different ways, but i would only want to be in a relationship with a woman.
blessings
xxx
xx
x
I find them attractive for different things too,but i'm open to a relationship with either.But I would probably put myself 60/40 towards girls.
I'm Bi so what!
theres this thing called the kinsly scale (sorry if someone has already mentioned it)
5-gay
4 - gay but open to men
3-100% bisexual
2 - mostly straight but have been there or would like to go there
1-straight
its probably rubbish, but i would say i was a 2.5.
in my dvd collection i have but im a cheerleader, tipping the velvet, all the seasons of the L word, so if you were a stranger in my room you might think i was gay! not just cos i have lesbian films, but come on that many??? i know my mum suspects! lol
"you'd shoot me if you had the chance wouldnt you?"
"with a big *beep* smile on my face."
Perhaps I will seem a tad pedantic for caring about this, but one is 'bi-curious' if one's identity lies on either end of the vibrant spectrum that is human sexuality.
After all, all we mean when we say that a mostly straight individual is bi-curious is that they might have gay tendencies; thus, potentially, making them bisexual, or attracted to both sexes/genders. A person who is mostly lesbian or a gay male, but still somewhat attracted to the opposite sex and mulling over what that might mean for them, is still (potentially) attracted to BOTH sexes. It may be two different strains of said 'orientation', but linguistically, the opposite of bi-curious is bi-curious!
~ He has a face for radio, and a voice for mime! ~
Of course bi-curious can aply to people closer to the homosexual end of the Kinsy scale.But being bi-curious and being bisexual are two very different things,bi-curious doesn't mean you are actually attracted to a member of the same sex (or opposite if your gay) it can just mean your curious about what it would feel like.Being bisexual means you are actually attracted sexually,bi-curiousity isn't technically anywhere on the scale it's outside the scale on either end.
The full of words say,how I want you...How I love you.
I'm bisexual and I came out as so on the same day my boyfriend asked me out.
We've been together 3 and a half years so it's probably (and I really hope) to stay.
However, I haven't been sexually attracted to another man since him. Well, apart from John Carter from ER, but hey, who wouldn't? Anyway, I have only had crushes on girls since being with him. But it could be that I've never been with a girl and now probably won't get the chance unless a threesome option comes up. Or that he completely fills in the "man" gap. I don't know. I just go with the flow.
What it really comes down to is that sexualaity can't truly be defined or classified. I have never met any gay man or woman who claims to have only been attracted to the same sex. Just like i've never met any straight person who claims that they've never thought about same sex encounters. That's why i hate labels, because all they do is cause trouble.
And i think bisexuals get the most *beep* because they get it from homosexuals and heterosexuals. Alot of my gay friends claim that there is no such thing as a bisexual and that they all fall one way or another.
well, no freaking duh. you can't marry a man and a woman at the same time. *eyeroll*
but anyway, i think the smartest thing is to avoid labels on your sexuality and just admit that you like people. having labels just throws you into confusion anytime you like someone you're "not supposed to"
and i could never explain it very well, so i turn to kevin smith to explain my feelings:
"
Alyssa: You know, I didn't just heed what I was taught, men and women should be together, it's the natural way, that kind of thing. I'm not with you because of what family, society, life tried to instill in me from day one. The way the world is, how seldom it is that you meet that one person who just *gets* you - it's so rare. My parents didn't really have it. There were no examples set for me in the world of male-female relationships. And to cut oneself off from finding that person, to immediately halve your options by eliminating the possibility of finding that one person within your own gender, that just seemed stupid to me. So I didn't. But then you came along. You, the one least likely. I mean, you were a guy.
Holden: Still am.
Alyssa: And while I was falling for you I put a ceiling on that, because you *were* a guy. Until I remembered why I opened the door to women in the first place: to not limit the likelihood of finding that one person who'd complement me so completely. So here we are. I was thorough when I looked for you. And I feel justified lying in your arms, 'cause I got here on my own terms, and I have no question there was some place I didn't look. And for me that makes all the difference. "
alright, that's enough outta me.
Okay Awesome
The thing is about girls, they're more open to the bisexual thing.
Guys, however, for the most part, are either gay or they're not (Jack Harkness has a few thousand centuries, ok? He doesn't count.)
blah blah, not done with this post but I want to go to bed.
BAD WOLF.
That's not true and a stereotype,men are just as likely to be bisexual as women they just aren't as likely to be open about it because of societies attitude.They would be classed as gay when their not so they keep it a secret or don't act on those feelings.The only reason bi women (like myself) are more open about our sexulity is that it's a bit more exceptable because with it being a male dominated society they get off on two women together and aren't threatened by it.
The full of words say,how I want you...How I love you.
That's no stereotype. When shown an image of a naked male, many men subliminally feel threatened. If they like women, why would they like men as well? I'm not trying to make generalizations, but in nature, male goals are to procreate with as many women as possible, fighting with other males to mate with females. I'm talking more about biology than human sociality.
Whereas women need to be more nurturing and soft to raise the young. Bisexuality for women is more natural, because women aren't competing among other women for males- they're looking for the BEST male so the baby gets good genes. They don't fight among themselves as much.
This is purely in nature though, what we evolved from.
BAD WOLF.
Sorry just because you obviously feel threatened by the fact men can be just as bisexual as women doesn't make your theory true.Studies into sexuality such as Kinsey's have shown men are as prone to being bisexual as women,but like I said bisexulity in men is just less accepted in today's society and homophobic men who get off on the thought of two women together like to hype the myth that bisexuality is a women only thing.
Go back to victorian era Middle Eastern cultures and you'll see it was widely accepted and practiced,also they same is true for ancient Greece and Rome era's-there's been a change in attitudes since then and it was seen as not what men should do.But I know bisexual men and no they aren't gay,my post is supported by scientific studies,personal experiences and history,yours is only supported by your misplaced conception of what bisexuality is.
The full of words say,how I want you...How I love you.
Threatened? Um, I'm a gay chick. Honestly, I could care less.
Any bisexual males I've known tended to be so *beep* (one guy repeatedly bashed his head against the lockers in the locker room and got carted off by an ambulance) I highly doubt they were credible.
I've known 4 or 5 who were dangers to themselves (and really just awful people- irritating and uncaring of other's feelings). I'm sure bisexuality in men CAN happen, but I don't think I've seen any legitimate cases of it.
Also, watch your tone. Just because you're on the internet, and you don't like what I have to say doesn't mean you talk down to me. It doesn't look good when you type like that, anyhow.
BAD WOLF.
And the way your talking about bisexual men is obvious biphobia and is disrespectful,i'm simply pointing out facts that go against your argument.There are studies that have proven there are genuine bisexual men and that bisexuals are just as capable of being faithful as anyone else and as sane.And just because your gay that means nothing,ignorance is ignorance no matter your orientation.
Just because you know a select few bisexual men does not mean stereotypes fit all,you of all people should know better than that.And by the way i'm a bisexual female and I found your posts disrespectful to my sexuality in general and ignorant,how would you feel if someone said that about gay men-you would be offended.
The full of words say,how I want you...How I love you.
Biphobia? BAAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWW. Get offended elsewhere.
I don't CARE if you found it offensive. I'm stating what I see to you. If you get butthurt, that's your problem. Look for affection and sympathy in a self-help group, with relatives, or with friends. THIS IS THE INTERNET. Nobody cares about your tiny penis.
All of the bisexuals I know have eventually settled into favoring one gender over the other, no mattering how their orientation changed.
I have to squint to read your poorly comma'd paragraphs. Until you start typing in a way I don't have to decipher your every goddamn word, you're worthless to have an argument with.
BAD WOLF.
As I'm a girl, which I did put in my post, I don't have a penis. As for your attitude, you're very ignorant. Knowing a select few of any group doesn't make you an expert, whether you like to believe you are or not. As for bisexuals, well of course they favour one gender over another as they're in a relationship with a member of that gender. If you knew anything about bisexuals you would also know every one is different, and the definition of bisexual doesn't mean you have to be equally attracted to both genders. Perhaps you educate yourself on the subject before you discuss it, otherwise you just come off looking ill informed.
Bisexuality is an entirely HUMAN sexual orientation. Just like any other sexual orientation, so yes, men can be bisexuals and MANY of them do exist. There have been studies done throughout the years to show that bisexuality among men is a lot more common than we think. Lot's of men who were studied on showed they were sexually aroused by male/male AND female/female pornography. There are billions of people in the world, bisexual men and women are EVERYWHERE. And honestly, just because you have personally never seen it, doesn't mean it never existed.
Totally!
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I've had relationships with women, I've had relationships with men. I wouldn't say I like them both equally, I like different things about both sexes. They both have such wonderful qualities!
share