MovieChat Forums > East Is East (2000) Discussion > Horrible dad for real?

Horrible dad for real?

posted 16 years ago by frogca
14 replies | jump to latest

The father was so over the top, but even his basic behaviour of yelling at anyone who disagrees and then hitting them, even if not to the extreme here, is this kind of attitude typical of a Pakistani father? Do they rule with an iron fist and brook no disagreement? Again, obviously he was psycho and over the top, but I'm just asking about the general attitude of insane unreasonable strictness. His attitude ruled a lot of the action in the early part of the movie, where all the kids tried to hide their actions from him and would scramble when he threatened to appear on scene.

I hated the guy, and were he my dad I'd have run away or killed him in his sleep, depending on my age and options. Bastard. :)

[–] Lolification 15 years ago

calling his child a bastard coz he hadn't been "fixed" LMAO
--------------------------
"I've been kidnapped and I'm wearing a night gown" Salem.

[–] 15 years ago

[deleted]

[–] AdKh1983 15 years ago

i looked at the father's actions as part of his character, not his culture. i hated him!

[–] stokefan 15 years ago

That's what the question was about though - is this the actions of a typical Pakistani father?

[–] shellieeyre 15 years ago

That would depend on whether you believe such a thing (typical Pakistani father) exists. I would suggest that it does not.

[–] frogca 14 years ago

Good to know. I've had Indo-Canadian friends and they have generalized about parental expectations. I guess that's more a cultural thing and this is more a personality thing. On the other hand, I have worked with people of different cultures and sometimes I do see strong trends with particular age groups in particular cultures.

[–] Concise_Statement 13 years ago

Speaking from a quantum of personal experience it's the culture - specifically the religion.

"And no regrets?"

[–] Lolification 15 years ago

What these over the top father do not realise is that because tey are not allowed to do anything, an example would be a mate I used to have wasn't allowed to even watch the telly and her brother wasn't allowed out so he used to sneak out and do drugs. Anywho I thing my mate got married off to some fella.

--------------------------
"I have to return some videotapes" Patrick Bateman

[–] sajmeister2000 14 years ago

My father is a bit like that, it's just the character of such Asian men who tend to be like this itis nothing to do with his culture or tradition. I know many men of same background and they are very easy going, so it's just the character not his culture of traditions.

http://imdb.com/title/tt0109872/board/nest/54510162

[–] TheCunnysmythe 14 years ago

I still found him to be a sympathetic character. He was desperately trying to do what he felt was right, but getting it all wrong. Notice that the iron fist behaviour came much later in the film when everything was falling apart.

[–] swirlypepper 13 years ago

No, it's not normal Asian dad behaviour to batter his wife and split his son's face. My dad definitely expects me to follow his rules and I got a lot of smacked bums as a kid but he'd never hit me to vent his frustrations on me. Also even though he's ferociously strict on his rules being followed he's more flexible in what he expects out of my sister and I and I can only attribute it to the fact that we're lucky enough to live in modern times and there have been many mixed cultural mistakes and triumphs to learn from. For example they didn't want me dating around at school, I didn't want an arranged marriage, we both agreed I'd leave dating until I started working so all my ducks were in a row before I did the romance thing. Very reasonable from my point of view but I know a lot of my friends still see them as overly controlling.

The main issue is that Asians are raised to be close and take a lot of pride in each others' achievements and to care and interfere when we someone going astray. Adults always know better and you're generally counted as a kid until you're married yourself. This can be restrictive but I have no doubt that my best interest are always in their hearts. Most of the rules are now enforced just because we get on so well and I don't see the point in upsetting them when I know they won't feel responsible for me in a couple of years, I can do what I want then :)

My problem with the movie is I could see that he thought he was genuinely doing what he thought was for the best but only had violence to resort to when he felt his power slipping. However an Asian dad would not have smiled politely while someone dissed his family and home (even if he agrees lol). With great strictness and a nearly dictatorship like rule comes a huge amount of protectiveness and if anybody complained about me to him he'd throw them out on their ear :D

[–] UmranA 13 years ago

I don't think its typical of a Pakistani father. My father was very strict when I was growing up but he wasn't a bully like in this movie. I've observed the same with my friends and relatives too. They're strict but they're not bullies.

It's also got nothing to do with religion either. Something that get's bandied around here once in a while.

[–] vedrana_a 13 years ago

I' ll be realistic and say that there is something about culture and his behaviour.
Prejudices become prejudice because there are based on a reality.

[–] csuperman 13 years ago

Well, I think the fact that there's a sense of harmlessness, on his part, throughout the first half needs to be credited. There are many people like him in this world and they get away with it for the same reasons he does; he doesn't quite seem to be causing damage, he's just a small obstacle to enjoy getting around. It's only when people start to become genuinely unhappy the real drama starts and his behaviour in the beginning half is called into question.

Enjoy your egg whites.