Nathaniel Parker as Gabriel Oak

Most of his other period roles are bad characters, I'm afraid. But you'll find some nice views of his naked bum in Wide Sargasso Sea.

I know this quotation is from the novel, but the question is how it is to be interpreted. I think the paragraph here is not actually inconsistent or contradictory to what another poster, "shazeroon", had said earlier. This is especially so if one has read some of Hardy's later novels and knows what his views of love and marriage as an institution were like.

The paragraph might be interpreted as saying that "fellowship" and "camaraderie" through "similarity of pursuits" formed the strongest bonds that might last a lifetime, but that love between men and women are often based mostly on sexual attraction that may not last. Thus love of the first kind is more powerful and long-lasting, without which affection based on sexual attraction is unlikely to last. So far, so good, right?

But I can also phrase it the other way. Could love between the sexes be based on camaraderie alone, without any sexual desire? Or more basically what is love? I can say I am in love with my family, my friend (either of the same or opposite sex), etc., or just with an idea. But speaking of love between the sexes, it is possible for it to be based on comradeship alone without sexual attraction (or pleasure) entering? Many men would say "no", and based on his later novels, Hardy would have said "no" too.

Look, for example, at the relationship between Jude Fawley and the two women - his wife Arabella and his cousin Sue. Jude was a working man who dreamed of going to Oxford. He married Arabella from physical desires, but because of his intellectual aspirations was repelled by its vulgarity. He was impressed by Sue's intelligence and was able to relate to her intellectually, and they certainly had "similarity of pursuits" in their love of the classics. Sue, however, thought sex would have degraded their platonic relationship. She not only refused sex to her own husband but did the same when she left him for Jude - until he threatened to return to his wife. Even without the later tragedy, their relationship could hardly have been a happy one.

Now returning to Far From the Madding Crowd, was Bathsheba really "in love" with Gabriel at the end? The comradeship between the two was indisputable, but did Bathsheba at any point feel romantically towards Gabriel? Here, I think the poster "shazeroon" had reason to express his doubts. On reading the book, I don't have the impression that Bathsheba at any time felt for Gabriel what a woman in love would have felt. Even at the end they were more like business partners. Would she even have married Gabriel if he did not want to leave for California? She clearly needed Gabriel to help to run the farm. It is also not too unreasonable to suggest that after what had happened, a woman in her situation might want to have a quiet life and has learned not to expect too much. As for Gabriel, I think his love was at first also based on physical attraction - he made his proposal while hardly knowing anything about her. His continued interest and loyalty to her, though admirable, at times suggested some kind of fixation not too dissimilar in nature to that of Boldwood. Overall, I still think he felt much more for Bathsheba romantically than the reverse.