Why did you make such an awful movie?

If Roger Ebert "Thumbs Upped" it, you know it will suck. So why did you make it? Why did you create such a massively horrible piece of *beep* Why did you let bad actors act even worse? Just watch the end with Nick Nolte in the desert and try not to vomit.

It's your fault. You did it. You have to take responsibility.

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'Slippy flappy suck sook!'--Lappy Slapsum, "The Rage of Friction"