Most folks are missing the point

Narcissistic Personality Disorder is becoming more prevalent in society with each passing decade. I found this movie very interesting because I have been the victim of a Narcissist who ruined my life. I lost my job, my job prospects, my child, my reputation, everything.

I note the controlling and manipulative behaviours demonstrated by Jenny in this movie. She clearly is obsessed with getting what she wants, and regards the people around her as 'resources' who are merely 'a means to an end'. Sound familiar? Go for a trip to Mainland China and talk to Chinese people who can speak English. It won't take long before the term "useful or not useful" enters the conversation with regard to other human beings. The Chinese mind-set is preoccupied with binaristic thinking. In other words, something can only be "this OR that" but it cannot be "this AND that". My idea about this is borne of lived experience while a resident of Hong Kong, where I worked, studied, and made a family.

In this movie, the husband was in bed with a broken leg, when he was suddenly awoken by the surrogate cavorting around in his bedroom, wildly spraying insecticide in the air. The husband pleaded with her to stop, as the toxic spray is "not good for the baby" but the narcissistic surrogate threw him the rejoinder of "neither are mosquito bites". This is typical of the irrational argument of the narcissist. They are insane but they know how to 'act normal' and respond appropriately in social situations most of the time. The real test of a narcissist is to stir them up to a point where they totally lose their temper, and then you will see the madness and the wickedness in their true nature.

Narcissists are agents of destruction. They break up families, ruin businesses, and destroy lives. I think as a society we need to be more mindful in trying to identify narcissistic persons, so we may stand against them at every opportunity and help them find the treatment they need (if such treatment exists). I have found that narcissists are typically untreatable because they almost exclusively refuse to admit there is anything wrong with them psychologically, and remain always in a state of denial while pushing the blame onto anyone and everyone around them. As I have said, they are adept at mimicking normal social behaviour so they will not easily be detected. Another term for a narcissist is “sociopath”, since they appear to have no social conscience, nor any genuine human emotions outside of their own ego.