MovieChat Forums > Waiting to Exhale (1995) Discussion > WTH is up with Bernie's character?

WTH is up with Bernie's character?


I just saw this movie again for the first time in years and I just now noticed the hypocrisy of this character. She is supposed to come across as a sympathetic wife who gets cheated on and dumped. But in the movie, she sleeps with the married football player, and gets emotionally involved with Wesley Snipes' married character. She seemingly has no remorse for being the 'other woman' in either situation. Her good friends Robin and Savannah are both sleeping with married men, and it doesn't even seem to phase Bernie. After what happened to her, you'd think she'd find this type of behavior irritating at least.

Is any of this addressed in the book?

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this is one of the reasons i didn't feel sorry for her. in fact this is why i didn't find her likable. Robin and Savannah came off a bit more likable because they had a little softness to their personalities but ultimately they are just as bad. one of my main problems with this movie

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I think that she was just lashing out because she was hurt. Remember when Gloria confronted her about sleeping with that married man she replied "Men have been doing this for year" she also said "I tapped dance for a man for 11 years and I don't want another owner" or something to that effect. Although like everybody she got lonely from time to time and needed sometype of affection from a man, although she didn't want a committed relationship. Wheather she was still hurt and didn't trust men or maybe she was enjoying her freedom and gaining control over her life, she wasn't looking for a relationship. Maybe she figure all married men cheats every now and then and with a married man there would be no strings.

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I'm watching this movie now and I felt sorry for Bernie character to tell the truth. Just to have your husband come in and say he isn't going to the dance with you and leaving you for another woman. At least he was honest, but really I cried when she was lashing out and throwing John clothes in the car.

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Everyone except for Gloria has a thing with a married man. I brought this up when I first saw this movie 17 years ago and I can't recall it being discussed in the book.

Terry McMillan was clearly on a extramarital affair kick...maybe she was having one at the time.

"Sometimes, a girl needs a half." Sex and The City

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"I'm not like you Gloria; I need someone to hold me... even if it is a damn lie".

Basically she was saying she wasn't used to being alone or content with it the way Gloria had dedicated her life to her son and her job. Bernie still wanted love and was willing to settle for whatever she could get. She had been hurt really bad.

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You have to understand that Bernie was SO jilted by her husband cheating that she lost all morals and faith when it came to marriage. Her attitude was "I'm not trying to take him from his wife" as though she had accepted all men cheat so as long as she didn't commit or become emotionally involved, she would just enjoy herself.

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I think Bernie did that because she was hurting still. She just chopped off all of her long hair and started flirting with the hottest guy at the club. She didn't care that he was married; she just wanted to show that she's still hot and she can get anyone she wants. Gloria confronts her about this when they go to the carnival, and she basically admits to just that.

The guy Bernie goes to the hotel with is just a scumbag though. I know his wife is dying and everything, but if he really loved her he wouldn't want to sleep with other women. He goes on to profess his love for his wife and how he would never leave her. Well wtf, dude?! That pisses me off a LOT more than what Bernie does (and in this case, nothing. Unless people regularly nap in their shoes and clothes).

You're right that Bernie is a hypocrite in a way. It's never addressed, but maybe she doesn't view it in the same light as her own situation. Savannah and Robin are the 'other woman', they don't know what it's like being cheated on. Maybe Bernie is just focused on her own pain and situation.

Thankfully Robin drops Russell on his ass, as does Savannah (with a great monologue to boot!). In the end, the girls have seen the light and redeem themselves. So I don't have an issue with Bernie's hypocrisy. It's part of the story and the character development. Characters can (and should) have flaws, and the story is about overcoming them and being true to yourself.

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It's weird reading the book and watching the movie at 21(My age in 95) and 41. I view things so differently. Back then I thought Savannah and Bernadine were strong women. They all judged Robin rather harshly in the book because of her love for Russell. Looking at it now, yes they were hypocritical, because they were both involved with unavailable men. In fact, I find Robin more likable due to her brutal honesty and willingness to admit her faults and mistakes, plus she was so optimistic and supportive. At 41 my over all favorite is Gloria. Today I find Savannah a flake and Bernadine a passive-aggressive drama queen.

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Only person I could root for was Gloria.

The other 3 may have came to their senses at end of the movie...but I still was saying WTF?

I love that guy shutting down Robin saying...I don't need to tell you what I'm doing with my OWN WIFE!!

Seriously....any woman with an ounce of self dignity..
Would have told him to get the HELL out...
Robin just went to sleep LOL

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