The character that Julliane plays

I'm very similar to this character but in a totally different way. I'm 45 a male I guess. A lifetime of little interests love support care and failed at everything. I been living with parents my whole life who basically turned 70. I'm impoverished financially and spiritually. I never been anywhere or done anything worthy. I have had imbalanced sexual urges that mess up me physically and mentally that don't get satisfied realistically. You can say my whole life has not been real. Only that I'm writing this and I'm alive that's it. And death is always on my conscious to end this horrible path I have chosen. That's partly what I see when I watch this film. And also I have no energy either. I'm basically disoriented and detached. It's not mental illness. It's the mammoth of this existence. Single disabled and screwed.