Things you'll never hear 'Balto' characters say

[deleted]

yeah, I also need to watch it again. Do you copy? Over. [static]

"Hey, mom! Check out Toby's new trick!"
"TOBY! NO!"

I [fuzz] copy.

Yes Rico, kaboom.

now I got something. It might be funny.

Boris: Is love, so go make move. When the angels' balalaikas strum the sweet song of love... mambo.
[Balto pushes Boris off the edge to shut him up]
Balto: [sarcastically] Whoops, my paw slipped.

"Hey, mom! Check out Toby's new trick!"
"TOBY! NO!"

Ha ha ha!

Yes Rico, kaboom.

I like your username. It sounds pretty cool. Dig the sig!

Lobos por siempre.

I like yours too.

Si, wolves forever!

Yes Rico, kaboom.

another funny one with some old flavor. After this I'll try to think up some more original stuff.

Balto: Boris, did you ever think you're the reason the other geese fly south?
Boris: If only your feet were as fast as your mouth.
[Balto slaps Boris across the face]
Balto: [sarcastically] Whoops, nervous tic.

One thing - how do you get that funny bouncing smiley-face on there? It's crackin' me up!

Lobos por siempre.

You put brackets around "jump 2". I'll show, but you have to put the brackets immediately next to the words. So it's [ jump2 ]
Only, when you close in the brackets, it looks like . If you want to see exactly how it looks written out, just put your mouse pointer of this smiley face: . The words you need to type in should appear.

Yes Rico, kaboom.

[deleted]

thanks. Let's get back to business, shall we? This *might* be funny.

[after Steele throws Balto against the rock]
Balto: That really hurt! I'm gonna have a lump there, you idiot! Who throws a dog against a rock? Honestly! You fight like a woman!

Lobos por siempre.

You were doing something like this earlier, but

[Steele is tottering near the edge right before he falls.]
Balto: You are terminated!
[Steele falls.]

Yes Rico, kaboom.

[Rosy is sledding away with Jenna running]
Rosy's mom: Wow. You are so cheap.
Rosy's dad: It's her first sled. Supposed to be like that.

Rosy's dad: And you didn't think that the United States Military might need to know that you're keeping a hostile dog-bullying black-and-white Alaskan Malamute running loose in Nome?
The doctor: Until this diphtheria outbreak we had no credible threats to Nome's security.
Rosy's dad: Well, you got one now!
Balto: [watching through the window] No kidding!

Lobos por siempre.

[Muk whimpering incoherently]
Boris: What'd he say?
Luk: His vocal chords were damaged the first time we tried to swim. I'm still working on them.

Rosy's dad: Rosie! He might bite you honey. He's part wolf.
Rosy: Sledding is the right of all sentient canines.

That's all I got right now. Yours are hilarious though!
Yes Rico, kaboom.

[deleted]

[deleted]

[deleted]

these *might* be funny.

Steele: [after the sled accident] This is either a really smart move or by far the stupidest thing that I've ever done.

Balto: Not so tough without a sled, are ya?
[kicks Steele off the cliff]

Rosy's dad: Rosy has to be gotten to a hospital.
Rosy's mom: A hospital? What is it?
Rosy's dad: It's a big building with patients, but that's not important right now.

[in the building, upon hearing Balto's howl]
Steele: Looks like I picked the wrong day to quit sniffing glue.

[Balto is leading the team back to Nome]
Star: Balto, you're going too fast!
Balto: I know, I know!
Kaltag: He knows, he knows!

[sbout Steele]
Balto: I know, but this guy has no sledding experience at all. He's a menace to himself and everything else on the ground... yes, bears too.

Lobos por siempre.

That second to last one was really funny.
Are you adapting from a movie for that last quote? Because it sounds like a phone call or something.

Yes Rico, kaboom.

it's from "Airplane". Boy, I really need to watch this movie again. Is that a 10-4?

Lobos por siempre.

Yes sir. I've never watched aiplane.

Yes Rico, kaboom.

[deleted]

Airplane's pretty funny. I've got another one.

[Steele is confronting Balto after the sled accident]
Steele: [about the box of serum with FRAGILE on it] What does that say, wolfdog?
Balto: I came to *lead*, not to *read*.

Lobos por siempre.

Ha ha ha. By the way. I notice every one of the responses you make because I get notified by mail. So you don't have to delete your messages and put up new ones. I always see 'em.

Yes Rico, kaboom.

alright. I'll try, Blaze. Here's another one.

[sliding down the cliff after the sled accident, checking on the team]
Balto: 'Sup dawgs?

Do you get it?

Lobos por siempre.

Yes. I get it. Hee hee hee.

Yes Rico, kaboom.

[the cliff scene]
Steele: Balto, wait! Before you push me off the cliff, I just want to say one last thing...
Balto: [exasperated] What?!
Steele: I know there's a strong chance you'll push me off the cliff toward my inevitable death, but there is good news - I just saved a bunch of money on my car insurance by switching to Geico. [gets pushed off]

I know it's not that good, but it's all I can come up with right now.

Lobos por siempre.

No, that's actually styled after the ad quite effectively. Random lead-up, great puch line.

Yes Rico, kaboom.

Star: How are we going to survive without Balto? He's like, our main dude.
Nikki: Yeah, I don't know.
[sees Balto passing by]
Nikki: Hey Balto, how are we gonna survive without you's?
Balto: I don't know. I'm like, your main dude.
Kaltag: Straight up!

[when Steele bullies Boris]
Steele: Your goose is cooked!

Still might not be that good, but that's all I got in my noggin right now.

Lobos por siempre.

So what expolsion is going to conclude your first statement?

Yes Rico, kaboom.

what do you mean?

Lobos por siempre.

I mean, pretty soon after that scene in Cloverfield, panic ensues! I wasn't really asking, I was just saying rhetorically...

Yes Rico, kaboom.

[deleted]

[deleted]

[deleted]

was it something I said or what? Haven't heard from ya in a few days, man. Awaiting response.

Lobos por siempre.

No I'm alive. You haven't said anything wrong, I just haven't responded. Please know that I *do* read whatever reply you put up, provided it isn't deleted too quickly (which has only happened once). But, I knw it's frustrating to not be acknowledged, so I'll try to respond to as much as I can.

Yes Rico, kaboom.

whoops! Got some more. All I got in my noggin right now.

Nikki: Good wordplay there, boss!
Kaltag: You are the wittiest, you are the drollest, the cleverest, the sharpest, you are the most hilariousest!
Star: You crack me up!
Kaltag: [to Star] If you don't get a filter on that brain-mouth thing, you're gonna be off the team. Understand? [bonks him on the head]

[the cliff scene]
Balto: Now this will only hurt a little...
[pushes Steele off]

[running from the avalanche]
Kaltag: Okay, just to be clear here, our options are: die here, die in the ice cave, or die in the cold. That pretty much it?
Balto: Yeah... that's pretty much it.

Star: [being annoying] So, how do you want to do this? Do you want to do most of the talking? Or do you want me to do most of the talking?
Balto: You're not doing any talking.
Star: Okay. Cool.

[after Star's "we're lost" comment and Steele tells him they're not]
Steele: [to himself] Why must I be surrounded by freakin' idiots?

and breaking a movie 'cause I can't help it... [the below was not meant to be funny, but laugh if you must]

Balto: You bully me and now it's time to pay!
Steele: This is blasphemy! This is madness!
Balto: Madness...? [shouting] This is Nome!
[pushes Steele off the cliff]

Lobos por siempre.

Hee hee hee. The bottom one does make sense.

Yes Rico, kaboom.

[Star has put the lead on Balto and Balto is talking to Steele]
Balto: You know the difference between you and me? I make this look *good*.

Lobos por siempre.

Ha. Poor Steele.

Yes Rico, kaboom.

Jenna: So why Nome?
Balto: It’s the Allspark.
Jenna: Allspark? What is that?.
Balto: Well, he came here looking for some sort of cube-looking thing. Anyway, Mr. NBE-1 here, aka Steele... [glares at Jenna] That's what they call HIM... who's pretty much the harbinger of the annoying, wants to use the cube to transform canine technology to take over Nome. That's his plan. And to annoy me.

[to Rosy]
Rosy's dad: A musher don't pick the sleds. Mmm-mm. Sleds pick the musher. It's a mystical bond between man and piece of wood that doesn't really do anything.

[leading the team back to Nome, talking about Steele]
Balto: We're facing war against a black-and-white Alaskan Malamute far superior to us! Our enemy can take any shape! He could be anywhere!

Balto: [before Steele attacks him] Come on, Malamute punk!

[the dogs are trying to convince Steele to let Balto lead the team back to Nome]
Steele: Alright... Ok. Hey, you want to lay the fate of Nome on some half-breed? That's cool.

Balto: [after pushing Steele off the cliff] [sarcastically] Oops... Sorry, my bad.

[this one might not be that funny, but chuckle or laugh if you must]
Balto: [about Steele] He's a Malamute. And Malamutes are annoying! No offense to you, Jenna.
Jenna: None taken

[this one might not be that funny, but chuckle or laugh if you must]
Steele: It's you and me, Balto.
Balto: No, it's just me, Steele.
Steele: At the end of this day, one shall stand, one shall fall!
Balto: You still fight for the really annoying! That is why you lose!

Kaltag: [sees Steele] What is that?
Balto: It's a terrible thing.
[while trying to get back to Nome, the dogs encounter Steele]
Kaltag: Oh my gosh! What is that?
Balto: I don't know! Something else! Also terrible.

[talking about Steele]
Balto: Look, all I'm saying is that he coulda have come from anywhere! He could have come from outer space!
Jenna: Like Superman?
Balto: Yeah! Wait... you know who Superman is?
Jenna: [sarcastically] Wait, you know Superman? I think I'm feeling something here... Are you aware of Garfield?

[this one might not be that funny, but chuckle or laugh if you must]
Balto: [during a very stressful run through the ice cave, talking about Steele] How could they not know anything about him? Unless... maybe they're like, in on it, you know? Like maybe the government created him or something.
Rob Hawkins: Do we have to talk about this now, Balto?
Balto: Well, I need to talk about something, because if I don't I'm going to actually dump in this cave.

[this one might not be that funny, but chuckle or laugh if you must]
Balto: Do you guys remember a couple of years ago when Steele was lighting homeless dogs on fire in the ice caves?
Star: Jeez, Balto! Maybe not the best time for this conversation in here!
Baltod: Right. [awkward silent pause] I just can't stop thinking how scary it'd be if a flaming homeless dog came running...
Nikki, Kaltag, Star: BALTO!
Balto: I'm just saying. Sorry.

Kaltag: [with Nikki and Star, trying to get Steele to stop hurting Balto] One of us is gonna have to tackle you and that's gonna be very uncomfortable for everyone involved!

Lobos por siempre.

You uh, don't like Transfomers all that much do ya'?



Yes Rico, kaboom.

[deleted]

these might not be that funny, but I tried. You might get these if you know that Kevin Bacon voices Balto, and if you know other movies Kevin Bacon was in.

[Balto is coming up the cliff with the crate of serum]
Nikki: Oh, no. Just when I thought we were lost, it's Kevin Bacon!

Steele: Didn't make the tem, Bingo?
Balto: My name's Balto.
Steele: I'm sorry, Balto. Balto half wolf.
Star: [menacingly ] He ha ha!
Balto: [to himself] Wow, suddenly 'Footloose' is not seeming so silly.

Steele: When I get back, I'm gonna fold you five ways, and leave you for a cat toy.
Balto: This is not going to solve the problems of this town. First we've got to come together as a community and learn to dance. ["Footloose" by Kenny Loggins begins playing]

Lobos por siempre.

I don't think I'm familiar with any of his other movies.

Yes Rico, kaboom.

oops. Familiar with MIB2?

Balto: [about Jenna] She's not my type.
Boris: Yada, yada, you're attracted. She's not even my species, and I'm attracted.

Lobos por siempre.

I don't think I ever watched it, no.

Yes Rico, kaboom.

are you familiar with "13 Going on 30"?

I know it's basically the same joke 3 times, but I tried to make 'em funny.

[at the end of the movie]
Balto: [smiles] Gina!
[runs toward her and plays]
Jenna: IT'S JENNA!

Balto: Don't talk to me, Gina. I might turn on you. [walks away]
Jenna: IT'S JENNA!

Balto: Gina?
[clears throat]
Balto: Gina?
Jenna: [looking at Rosy through the window; sighs exasperatedly] For the last time, it's JENNA!

Lobos por siempre.

Haven't seen that either, but those are funny.

Yes Rico, kaboom.

familiar with Ghostbusters? This *might* be funny. If you've seen it.

Balto: Everything was fine until Mr. Needs-anger-management here grabbed your bandana off my neck and threw me against a rock.
Steele: He pushed me off a cliff!
Jenna: [to Balto, cheering for him and totally booing Steele in her mind] Is this true?
Balto: Yes, it's true. This dog is some kind of rodent, I don't know which.

Lobos por siempre.

I didn't get to ever watch ghostbusters before, but my siblings have. And that is pretty funny.

Yes Rico, kaboom.

2003's Coffee and Cigarettes? These might not be *that* funny, but I tried.

Steele: Hi, Jenna. I know where all the bones are buried.
Jenna: I don't know, Steele. Suddenly I've lost my appetite.
Steele: Well, maybe your taste runs more toward... wolf. [Jenna looks at him angrily] Or we could go to Taco Bell if that's more your style.

[Balto is leading the return team throught the forest]
One of the other dogs (not Nikki, Kaltag, or Star): What day is it? I forgot.
Balto: Thursday, February 16th. Star. Next: "Stupid Questions" for 200.

[Balto is leading the return team through the forest and they're stuck behind another slow-moving team]
Balto: Hurry up, ya moron, I'm stuck here with dweedledumb, dweedledumber and dweedle-what-a-freakin'-moron.

Lobos por siempre.

Haven't seent that movie.

No Steele, wolf doesn't taste all that good.

Yes Rico, kaboom.

[deleted]

familiar with Billy Madison?

Kaltag: [talking to Steele] Making fun of a dog just for being a half-breed! Are you psycho? Do you not have a soul?

[alone at the bottom of the cliff. after Steele has thrown him off]
Balto: Oh Jenna! So hot! Want to touch the hiney! Arrroooooooo!

Balto: You got a misshaped head.
Steele: Thank you.

Steele: Mortal Kombat, on Sega Genesis, is the best video game ever.
Balto: I disagree, it's a very good game, but I think Donkey Kong is the best game ever.
Steele: Donkey Kong sucks.
Balto: You know something? YOU SUCK!

Steele: Steele rules.
Balto: Steele, I've got a feeling your whole family's going down.

Steele: Hey, guys, it's me. I bet you thought that I was dead. But when I fell off the cliff I just broke my leg and got a hemorrhage in my head. HA HA HA.

Lobos por siempre.

Never seen that either.

Yes Rico, kaboom.

familiar with B3:WoC?

Star: Slow down! You're going too fast!
Balto: Zip it, Star!

Balto: I'm kinda *not* hoping for a chance at lead *moron*, just like you, Steele.

Lobos por siempre.

I haven't seen the second or third Balto

Balto: I'm kinda *not* hoping for a chance at lead *moron*, just like you, Steele.

_________________________________

Haaaaaaaaaahahahaha. Wow.
_________________________________

what do ya mean?

Lobos por siempre.

It was funny.

Yes Rico, kaboom.

these might not be that funny, but I tried.

Steele: I've done some dumb things.
Balto: Seeing as how you're one of those dumb things, I can't give you too hard a time on that, Steele.

Balto: [watching Steele fall off the cliff] I don't know about you, but I'm havin' a ball.

Lobos por siempre.

I just lent my tape out to someone, so it's gonna be even longer before I can come up with something.

Yes Rico, kaboom.

[deleted]

[deleted]

I got another one.

Balto: [watching Steele fall off the cliff] It feels like winter, but looks like fall!

do you get it?

Lobos por siempre.

Yup, I get it.

Why do you keep deleting your posts?

Yes Rico, kaboom.

I honestly don't know why. But I got another few. They might not be that funny, but I tried.

Dixie: I can do it, Steele. I can be like you.
Steele: You don't want to be like me. I'm a bully.
Dixie: I can be a bully.
Steele: No you can't. [Dixe slaps Steele's bone out of his mouth] You going to get that?
Dixie: Yeah I'm sorry.

Balto: Balto giveth and Balto taketh away. Don't like it? Megabyte me.

Jenna: [after Balto was attacked by Steele] Oh, thank God you're all right.
Balot: Yeah, let's thank God, shall we? For his blessings are raining down upon me. Wait, that's not rain!

Lobos por siempre.

I'm a Christian, so can you not say stuff like that?

Yes Rico, kaboom.

all righty then. I won't. Sorry. I had no idea. Here are some more. They might not be that funny, but I tried.

Steele: I think I'm the best dog to lead the team back to Nome.
Balto: I disagree, you do a good job, but I think I can do a MUCH better job of it.
Steele: You suck.
Balto: You know something? YOU SUCK!

Steele: Steele rules.
Balto: Steele, I've got a feeling your whole family's going down.

[the cliff scene]
Balto: I've got two words for ya - rock 'n roll! [pushes Steele off the rocky cliff, watches him roll down]

do you get it?

Lobos por siempre.

I get it, I definetely get it.

Yes Rico, kaboom.

might not be that funny, but I tried.

Nikki: [about Steele] Congratulations, there, boss. It was a pleasure runnin' behind you's. 'Course the view got monotonous.
Steele: Well, you know what they say. If you ain't lead dog, the scenery never changes.

Lobos por siempre.

This may be pitiful. You've been warned.

Boris: A dog cannot make this journey alone. But maybe a wolf can. It's like in the great stories. Full of darkness and danger, they were. And sometimes you didn't want to know the end. Because how could the end be happy? How could the world go back to the way it was when so much bad had happened? But in the end, it's only a passing thing, this shadow. Even darkness must pass. A new day will come. And when the sun shines it will shine out the clearer. Those were the stories that stayed with you. That meant something, even if you were too small to understand why...

Yes Rico, kaboom.

might not be that funny, but I tried.

Boris: Not a dog. Not a wolf. All he knows is what he's not. If only he could see what he is. If only he weren't invisible.

Lobos por siempre.

*Balto watches as Steele teeters close to the edge...*

Balto: Long live the King.
*Steele falls*

Yes Rico, kaboom.

this might not be that funny, but I tried.

Balto: [narrating] Before the diphtheria epidemic began, there was Steele. I know not where he comes from, only that he holds the power to annoy me and drive me crazy. That is how our feud began. For a time, we lived in harmony. But like all great power, I wanted it for good, Steele for evil. And so began the war. A war that ravaged Nome until it was consumed by disease, and the serum was lost to the far reaches of Anchorage. We scattered across Alaska, hoping to find it and save the people of Nome. Searching every town, every mountain. And just when all hope seemed lost, message of a new discovery drew us to an unknown town called... Nenana. But we were already too late...

Lobos por siempre.

With the serum used, we have succesfuly brought life back to Nome. And fate has yielded its reward: a new group of dogs to call team. We live among Nome's people now, not really hiding, and definetely in plain sight. I have witnessed Nome's capacity for courage, and though we are worlds apart, like us, there's more to the townsfolk than meets the eye. I am Balto, and I send this message to any dog-wolf hybrids taking refuge among the checkpoints. We are hear. We are waiting.

Yes Rico, kaboom.

after this one I will think up more things.

White Fang: White Fang responding. [howls]

Lobos por siempre.

Buck: Buck en-route.

Yes Rico, kaboom.

White Fang: Serum located.
Balto: This is Balto: All wolfdogs, mobilize.
White Fang: White Fang en-route.
Buck: Buck incoming... All hail Balto!

Lobos por siempre.

How do ya' reckon they got radio communicators? Hee hee hee.

Yes Rico, kaboom.

these might not be that funny, but I tried.

[Balto is leading the team back, and has noticed clawmarks on ALL the trees]
Star: Whoa... has Wolverine been through here?
Kaltag: Naw, man! Wolverine's got three blades, that's four! That's Freddy Krueger!
[growls and laughs] Right, that's Freddy Krueger?
Balto: That's very funny.

Steele: Bingo?
Balto: It's Balto. Who are you?
Steele: I'm a sled dog. Steele.
Balto: Never heard of him.
Steele: Never will.

Lobos por siempre.

Rosie watching her mom put the famous red scarf around Jenna's head:
Mom, she has enough self esteem issues as a dog, now you're putting play clothes on her?
Rosie's mom: That's her bling.

Yes Rico, kaboom.

Balto: [watching Steele fall off the cliff] Not so tough without a sled are ya?

Lobos por siempre.

Hahahahaha!

Yes Rico, kaboom.

[deleted]

these might not be that funny, but I tried.

Rosy's dad: I've got a little surprise for you.
Rosy: No, no, no, no! Dad! Oh, you've got to be kidding me!
Rosy's dad: Yeah, I am. You're not getting a sled! [laughs]

[Balto has just climbed up from the bottom of the cliff with the serum]
Kaltag: Balto... you risked your life to protect the medicine?
Balto: No sacrifice, no victory.

Lobos por siempre.

Funny, but I have no ideas right now.

Yes Rico, kaboom.

[deleted]

this might not be that funny, but I tried.

Steele: I hate to tell you this, but Balto's dead. [Jenna starts to cry] Ha ha ha! You just got Punk'd! He's alive and he's comin' back!

Lobos por siempre.

Hee hee hee.

Yes Rico, kaboom.

Boris: Not a dog. Not a wolf.
Balto yelling back from afar: Dude, I'm part BOTH! I just get sick of dogs picking on me and get a little down. Sheesh, why not offer me some ice cream or somethin? You know, cheer a halfsie like me up?

After Balto brings back the medicine and all the people lean down to pet him:
Oh, now I'm worthy??? Screw you guys - I'm going home!

"Zombies, man. They creep me out."

[deleted]

this might not be that funny, but I tried.

Nikki: [about Steele] Congratulations, there, boss. It was a pleasure runnin' behind you's. 'Course the view got monotonous. And I think I've gone blind. I'm never runnin' behind you's again.

does anyone get it?

Lobos por siempre.

Nikki: This is the one serum, forged by the dark lord Steele... taken by Balto from the paw of Steele himself.

Aleu: Balto found it.

Nikki: Yes, for sixty dog years, the serum lay quiet in Nome, prolonging its residents' lives, delaying old age. But no longer Aleu, evil is stirring in Alaska. The serum has awoken. It's heard its master's call.

Aleu: But he was destroyed. Steele was destroyed.
(serum whispers creppily)

Nikki: No, Aleu. The spirit of Steele endured. His life force is bound to the serum, and the serum survived. Steele has returned. His minions have multiplied. His fortress of Juneau is rebuilt in the land of Alaska. Steele needs only this serum to cover all of Nome in a second darkness. He is seeking it, seeking it, all his thought is bent on it. The serum yearns to go home, to return to the hand of its master. They are one, the serum and Steele. Aleu, he must never find it.

Yes Rico, kaboom.

Kaltag: [narrating] He is immortal. Born in the outskirts of Nome 4 years ago. He is not alone. There are others like him, some good, some evil. For years he has battled the forces of doggy evil, with snowy ground his only refuge. He cannot die, unless you take his head, and with it his power. In the end there can be only one. He is Balto, the dog who will soon save Nome from a dreadful disease.

Balto: This *isn't* about me! It's about the whole town! Everybody's sick. This serum [nods toward the crate] it could cure them.

Lobos por siempre.

HAhaha! Alaskan dogs- giving a new definition to "highlanders".

Yes Rico, kaboom.

[Balto has returned and people are petting him]
Balto: Okay, I saved the town, now I need the girl.

Lobos por siempre.

(in response)
Dixie: Here I am, Balto!

Yes Rico, kaboom.

[deleted]

this might not be that good, but I tried.

[the cliff scene]
Balto: It's you and me, Steele.
Steele: No, it's just me, Balto.
Balto: At the end of this scene, one shall stand, one shall fall!
Steele: You still fight for the weak! That is why you lose! [gets pushed off the cliff by Balto]

Lobos por siempre.

That was a quick fight.

Yes Rico, kaboom.

this might not be that good, but I tried.

Jenna: [talking to Balto after he was dragged out of the freezing water] Oh, you're weak. In need of your serum. Who would have thought that a big, strapping hybrid like yourself could bring down a mere bear?

Lobos por siempre.

What's that from?

Yes Rico, kaboom.

[deleted]

[deleted]

it's from Blade: Trinity (2004).

Lobos por siempre.

Where'd the other poster go?

Yes Rico, kaboom.

do you mean otava-1?

Lobos por siempre.

Yeah.

Yes Rico, kaboom.

I dunno where the guy went, man. By the way, I'm leaving on a trip tomorrow, and won't be back until the 19th, so you won't hear from me for a couple weeks. I'll post something when I get back. Alright?

Lobos por siempre.

O.k.

Yes Rico, kaboom.

talk to ya on the 19th.



Lobos por siempre.

Bye

Yes Rico, kaboom.

temporarily. Talk to you in a couple weeks, Blazemane!

Lobos por siempre.

Alright, bye!

Edit: My family is going on vacation tommorow (June 14) until next Thursday (June 19). So I'll probably be back as soon as you. See ya' later.

Yes Rico, kaboom.

I'm back.

Is it wrong to love a wolf?

I'm back. You're back.

We're all back... and stuff.

Yes Rico, kaboom.

now that we're all back, let's get back to business, shall we? You familiar with "Family Guy"?

[when the white wolf notices Balto]
Aniu: I like your gray fur.
Balto: It's not a color, it's a lifestyle. You wouldn't know about it 'cause you're white as a ghost. You're haunting this place with your whiteness.

this might not be that funny, but I tried.

Is it wrong to love a wolf?

I've heard of it, but I've only watched maybe 1/2 of an episode, and I was only somewhat paying attention.

But that is funny.

Here's one:
Balto: Little geese do not belong in sled teams, master Boris.
Boris: But all my friends have gone to find the serum. I'd be shamed to be left behind.
Balto: It is a three day trek to find the serum, and none of my dogs can bear you as a burden.
Boris: I want to pull!
Balto: I will say no more.

Yes Rico, kaboom.

these might not be that funny, but I tried.

[Steele told that totally bogus "Balto's dead" story, and she's sad - temporarily]
Jenna: I haven't felt this awful since I saw the endng to "The Mist".

[after Balto has returned and gotten the girl]
Friendly dog that looks like Steele but isn't: Hey, hero dude! You want some ice cream?
Balto: Yes, but no sprinkles. For every sprinkle I find, I shall kill you.

Balto: I have an idea so smart that my head would explode if I even begin to know what I was talking about - I'm going to bring the team back and save the town!

Is it wrong to love a wolf?

Friendly dog that looks like Steele but isn't: Hey, hero dude! You want some ice cream?
Balto: Yes, but no sprinkles. For every sprinkle I find, I shall kill you.

this might not be that funny, but I tried.

[in the ice cave]
Nikki: Why are we fighting to save the humans? They're a primitive and violent race.
Balto: Are we so different? They are a young species. They have much to learn. But I've seen goodness in them. And I've seen a hot girl in town. Wellness is the right of all sentient beings. You all know there's only one way to end this epidemic. We must destroy Steele and deliver the serum. If all else fails, I will make my claws unite with his ugly face, which I've been meaning to do for a long time now.
Kaltag: That's suicide! Steele is raw power! I-I-it could destroy you both!
Balto: A necessary sacrifice to bring peace to Nome. We cannot let the humans pay for our mistakes. It's been an honor sledding with you all. Sled dogs, ROLL OUT!
Kaltag: WE ROLLIN'!

Is it wrong to love a wolf?

Very nice.

Yes Rico, kaboom.

[deleted]

these might not be that funny, but I tried.

Star: Hey, what's wolf for 'Go chase your tail'?
Balto: What's dog for 'Get a job, ya moron'?

[when Balto clears the spiderweb with his tail]
Jenna: Congratulations, there, Balto. It's a pleasure walking behind you. 'Course the view just got monotonous.
Balto: You're the most amazing, the most exalted, the most prominent, the most top drawn.

[when Steele is falling off the cliff]
Balto: Wow, it's fall already?

Balto: [leading the team back] Well, for once, the wolfdog is in control.

[during the Northern Lights scene in the basement]
Balto: Maybe *we* should kiss, just to break the tension.

Is it wrong to love a wolf?

Steele (to anyone): How are you today?

Yes Rico, kaboom.

[deleted]

these might not be that funny, but I tried.

Balto: [trying to insult Steele] You know, in all my life I've never heard you say anything even remotely interesting.

Dixie: So, Steele. What are you like?
Steele: Uh, I'm very shallow and empty and I have no ideas and nothing interesting to say.

that's all I can come up with right now.

Is it wrong to love a wolf?

Steele would never be that honest, hee hee hee.

Yes Rico, kaboom.

[deleted]

these might not be that good, but I tried.

Balto: Nome is changed. I feel it in the water. I feel it in the earth. I smell it in the air. Much that once was is lost, for none now live who remember it. It began with the forging of the Great Rings. Three were given to the Wolfdogs, immortal, wisest and fairest of all canines. Seven to the Huskies, great runners and traversers of the mountain passes. And nine, nine rings were gifted to the race of canines, who, above all else, desire power. But they were, all of them, deceived, for another Ring was made. In the land of Denali, in the fires of Mount McKinley, the Dark Lord Steele forged in secret a master Ring, to control all others. And into this Ring he poured his cruelty, his malice and his will to dominate all life. One Ring to rule them all.

Steele: Strangers from distant towns, friends of old, you have been summoned here to answer the threat of Nome. Nome stands upon the brink of destruction, none can escape it. You will unite or you will fall. Each citizen is bound to this fate, this one doom. Bring forth the serum, Balto.

Is it wrong to love a wolf?

I'm switching characters a bit on you here

Random dogs gasp quietly and murmur to themselves

Steele (to himself): So it is true.

Steele (to everybody): It is a gift, a gift to the foes of Canada. Why not use this serum? Long has my father, the steward of Juneau, kept the forces of Canada at bay. By the blood of our dogs, are your lands kept safe. Give Juneau the serum of the enemy. Let us use it against him!

Balto: You can not wield it, none of us can. The serum answers to small pox alone, it has no other master.

Steele: And what... would a mere wolf-dog know of this matter?

Kaltag: This is no mere wolf-dog. This is Balto, son of Belo, and you owe him your allegiance.

Steele: Balto? So this... is Buck's heir?

Kaltag: An heir to the leadership of Juneau.

Balto: Havo dad, Kaltag.

Steele: Juneau has no alpha male. Juneau needs no alpha male.

Yes Rico, kaboom.

this might not be that good, but I tried.

Kaltag: Legend tells of a half-wolf crusader, Balto, guardian of Nome, and his one true love, Jenna, the queen of the criminal underworld. Their passion left behind something extraordinary: a daughter, Aleu. Half wolf, she has taken up her father's mantle and fights to protect the innocent and helpless. Joining her in this struggle, Iron Will, once Balto's protégé, the Wolfdog, she was caught in the crossfire of the war between Balto and Steele. Now she fights crime a different way, a master of the dog teams and trainer to heroes. Together, they have taken in White Fang, a wolfdog himself, with powers that he is only beginning to explore. These three are the protectors of Nome: the Wolf Pack. My name is Kaltag and this is their story.

Is it wrong to love a wolf?

Iron Will, nice.

So what movie was that adapted from?

Edit: o.k., I just looked it up. Birds of Prey

Yes Rico, kaboom.

these might not be that good, but I tried.

Kaltag: The veiling shadow that glowers in the East takes shape. Steele will suffer no rival. From the summit of Mount McKinley his eye watches ceaselessly. But he is not so mighty yet that he is above fear. Doubt ever gnaws at him. The rumor has reached him. The heir of Nome still lives. Steele fears you, Balto. He fears what you may become. And so he will strike hard and fast at the world of Dogs. He will use his puppet Star to destroy Nome. War is coming. Nome must defend itself, and therein lies our first challenge, for Nome is weak and ready to fall. The King's mind is enslaved; it's an old device of Star's. His hold over King Nikki is now very strong. Steele and Star are tightening the noose. But, for all their cunning, we have one advantage. The Ring remains hidden. And that we should seek to destroy it has not yet entered their darkest dreams. And so the weapon of the Enemy is moving towards Denali in the paws of a Malamute. Each day brings it closer to the fires of Mount McKinley. We must trust now in Balto. Everything depends now upon speed and upon the secrecy of his quest. Do not regret your decision to leave him. Balto must finish this task alone.

Balto: From the darkest alley to the highest peak I fought with the Malamute of Nome... Until at last I threw down my enemy and smote his ruin upon the mountainside... Darkness took me, and I strayed out of thought and time... The stars wheeled overhead, and every day was as long as a life age of the earth... But it was not the end. I felt life in me again. I've been sent back until my task is done.

Is it wrong to love a wolf?

That's good.

Yes Rico, kaboom.

[deleted]

this might not be that good, but I tried.

Balto: You bully me and now it's time to pay!
Steele: This is blasphemy! This is madness!
Balto: Madness...? [shouting] This is Nome!
[pushes Steele off the cliff]

Is it wrong to love a wolf?

Baltonidus?

Yes Rico, kaboom.

this might not be that good, but I tried.

Nikki: You cannot pass!
Balto: Nikki!
Nikki: I am a servant of the Secret Fire, wielder of the flame of Anor. Go back to the shadow. The dark fire will not avail you, flame of Udun! You shall not pass!
Kaltag: The power of the enemy is growing. Steele will use his puppet Star to destroy the people of Nome. Nome has been unleashed. The Eye of Steele now turns to Nenana, the last free kingdom of dogs. His war on this town will come swiftly. He senses the Ring is close. The strength of the Ringbearer is failing. In his heart, Balto begins to understand. The quest will claim his life. You know this. You have foreseen it. It is the risk we all took. In the gathering dark, the will of the Ring grows strong. It works hard now to find its way back into the paws of dogs. Dogs, who are so easily seduced by its power. The young captain of Nenana has but to extend his paw, take the Ring for his own and the world will fall. It is close now, so close to achieving its goal. For Steele will have dominion over all life on this Earth, even unto the ending of the world. The time of the dogs is over. Do we leave Nenana to its fate? Do we let them stand alone?

Is it wrong to love a wolf?

Nice adaptation. That is probably one of the best monologues out there (but my favorite speech is Sam's at the end of the same movie. It's awesome).

Yes Rico, kaboom.

just extending a previous one. The other one might not be that good, but I tried.

Nikki: Nome is changed. I feel it in the water. I feel it in the earth. I smell it in the air. Much that once was is lost, for none now live who remember it. It began with the forging of the Great Rings. Three were given to the Wolfdogs, immortal, wisest and fairest of all canines. Seven to the Huskies, great runners and traversers of the mountain passes. And nine, nine rings were gifted to the race of canines, who, above all else, desire power. But they were, all of them, deceived, for another Ring was made. In the land of Denali, in the fires of Mount McKinley, the Dark Lord Steele forged in secret a master Ring, to control all others. And into this Ring he poured his cruelty, his malice and his will to dominate all life. One Ring to rule them all. One by one, the free peoples of Nome fell to the power of the Ring. But there were some who resisted. A last alliance of dogs and wolves marched against the armies of Nenana, and on the very slopes of Mount McKinley, they fought for the freedom of Nome. Victory was near, but the power of the ring could not be undone. It was in this moment, when all hope had faded, that Kaltag, son of the king, took up his father's sword. And Steele, enemy of the free dogs of Nome, was defeated. The Ring passed to Kaltag, who had this one chance to destroy evil forever, but the hearts of dogs are easily corrupted. And the ring of power has a will of its own. It betrayed Kaltag, to his death. And some things that should not have been forgotten were lost. History became legend. Legend became myth. And for two and a half years, the ring passed out of all knowledge. Until, when chance came, the ring ensnared another bearer. The ring came to the wolfdog Balto, who took it deep into the tunnels under the Alaskan Range, and there it consumed him. The ring gave to Balto unnatural long life. For fifteen years it poisoned his mind; and in the gloom of Balto's cave, it waited. Darkness crept back into the forests of the world. Rumor grew of a shadow in the East, whispers of a nameless fear, and the Ring of Power perceived. Its time had now come. It abandoned Balto. But then something happened that the Ring did not intend. It was picked up by the most unlikely creature imaginable. A Wolfdog, Iron Will, of White Mountain. For the time will soon come when Wolfdogs will shape the fortunes of all...

Kaltag: He's suffered a defeat, yes, but... behind the walls of Nenana, our enemy is regrouping.
Sled dog #1: Let him stay there. *Let him rot!* Why should we care?
Kaltag: Because 10,000 Malamutes now stand between Balto and Mount McKinley. I've sent him to his death.
Nikki: No. There is still hope for Balto. He needs time... and safe passage across the Alaskan tundra. We can give him that.
Sled dog #2: How?
Nikki: Draw out Steele's armies. Empty his lands. Then we gather our full strength and march on the Black Gate.
Sled dog #3: We cannot achieve victory through strength of arms.
Nikki: Not for ourselves. But we can give Balto his chance if we keep Steele's Eye fixed upon us. Keep him blind to all else that moves.
Sled dog #4: A diversion.
Sled dog #5: Certainty of death, *small* chance of success... What are we waiting for?
Kaltag: Steele will suspect a trap. He will not take the bait.
Nikki: [knowingly] No, I think he will.

Is it wrong to love a wolf?

Balto: I can't do this Boris.
Boris: I know. It's all wrong. By rights we shouldn't even be here. But we are. It's like in the great stories, Mr. Balto. The ones that really mattered. Full of darkness and danger, they were. And sometimes you didn't want to know the end. Because how could the end be happy? How could Alaska go back to the way it was when so much bad had happened? But in the end, it's only a passing thing, this typhus. Even typhus must pass. A new day will come. And when the sun shines it will shine out the clearer. Those were the stories that stayed with you. That meant something, even if you were too small to understand why. But I think, Mr. Balto, I do understand. I know now. Dogs in those stories had lots of chances of turning back, only they didn't. They kept going. Because they were holding on to something.
Balto: What are we holding onto Boris?
Boris: There's some good in this world, Mr. Balto... and it's worth fighting for.

Yes Rico, kaboom.

Nikki: His strength returns.
Kaltag: That wound will never fully heal. He will carry it the rest of his life.
Nikki: And yet, to have come so far, still bearing the Ring, the wolfdog has shown extraordinary resilience to its evil.
Kaltag: It is a burden he should never have had to bear. We can ask no more of Balto.
Nikki: Kaltag, the enemy is moving. Steele's forces are massing in the east, his eye is fixed on Nenana. And Star, you tell me, has betrayed us. Our list of allies grows thin.
Kaltag: His treachery runs deeper than you know. By foul craft, Star has crossed Malamutes with wolves. He's breeding an army in the caverns of McKinley. An army that can move in sunlight and cover great distance at speed. Star is coming for the Ring.
Nikki: This evil cannot be concealed by the power of the Wolves. We do not have the strength to withstand both Nenana and Anchorage. Kaltag, the Ring cannot stay here. This evil belongs to all of Alaska. They must decide now how to end it. The time of the Wolves is over, my fellow canines are leaving these towns. Who will you look to when we've gone? The Malamutes? They toil away in caverns, seeking riches. They care nothing for the troubles of others.
Kaltag: It is in Dogs that we must place our hope.
Nikki: Dogs? Dogs are weak. The Blood of Nome is all but spent, its pride and dignity forgotten. It is because of Dogs the Ring survives. I was there, Kaltag. I was there three years ago. I was there the day the strength of Dogs failed.
Nikki: [scene switches to a flashback of Nikki and Steele] Steele, hurry, follow me.
Nikki: [voiceover] I led Steele deep into the fires of Mount McKinley, where the Ring was forged, the one place it could be destroyed.
Nikki: Cast it into the fire! Destroy it!
Steele: No.
[walks away]
Nikki: Steele!
[cuts back to present]
Nikki: Steele kept the Ring. It should have ended that day, but evil was allowed to endure. There's no strength left in the world of Dogs. They're scattered, divided, leaderless.
Kaltag: There is one who could unite them. One who could reclaim the throne of Nome.
Nikki: He turned from that path a long time ago. He has chosen exile.

Balto: Hold your ground, hold your ground! Sons of Nome, of Anchorage, my brothers! I see in your eyes the same fear that would take the heart of me. A day may come when the courage of dogs fails, when we forsake our friends and break all bonds of fellowship, but it is not this day. An hour of woes and shattered sleds, when the age of dogs comes crashing down! But it is not this day! This day we fight! By all that you hold dear on this good Earth, I bid you *stand, Dogs of the West!*

Friendly Steele sound- and look-alike: [voiceover] And thus it was. A fourth age of Nome began. And the fellowship of the Ring... though eternally bound by friendship and love... was ended. Thirteen months to the day since Balto sent us on our long journey... we found ourselves looking upon a familiar sight. We were home. How do you pick up the threads of an old life? How do you go on... when in your heart you begin to understand... there is no going back? There are somethings that time cannot mend... some hurts that go too deep... that have taken hold. Balto once told me his part in this tale would end... that each of us must come and go in the telling. Balto's story was now over. There would be no more journeys for him... save one. My dear Jenna. You cannot always be torn in two. You will have to be one and whole for many years. You have so much to enjoy and to be and to do. Your part in the story will go on.

Is it wrong to love a wolf?

Have you ever played the Lord of the Rings trading card game? It is perhaps the best card game ever to be created.

[Inside Balto's sled preparation room]
Balto: Who am I Kaltag?
Kaltag: You are our pack leader sire.
Balto: And do you trust your pack leader?
Kaltag: Your dogs... will follow you... to whatever end.
Balto (pensive): ...Whatever end...
[Camera switch to Steele's dogs trodding maliciously over snowhills]
Where is the sled and the passenger? Where is the train horn that was blowing?
[Camera switch to Balto's dogs preparing their sleds and looking after their pads]
They have passed like rain on the mountain, like wind in the meadow.
[Camera switch back to Steele's dogs tramping]
The days have gone down into the West behind the hills into shadow.
[Camera back to Balto in the sled preparation room]
Balto (after pause): ...How did it come to this?

Yes Rico, kaboom.

nope.

Is it wrong to love a wolf?

So have you ever played it?

Yes Rico, kaboom.

no. Never heard of it. Are the LOTR movies any good? I haven't seen them.

Is it wrong to love a wolf?

O.k.

Yes Rico, kaboom.

you mean they're okay?

Is it wrong to love a wolf?

I was acknowledging the fact that you have not played Lord of the Rings.
You're adaptations are more than o.k.

Yes Rico, kaboom.

[deleted]

thanks. This might not be that good, but I tried.

White Fang: I bring word from Lord Iron Will of Skagway. An Alliance once existed between Wolves and Dogs. Long ago we fought and died together. We come to honor that allegiance.
Balto: Mae govannen, White Fang. You are most welcome.
White Fang: We are proud to fight alongside Dogs once more.

Is it wrong to love a wolf?

Boris: Do you remember Nome, Mr. Balto? It'll be spring soon. And the orchards will be in blossom. And the geese will be nesting in the hazel thicket. And they'll be sowing the summer barley in the lower fields... and eating the first of the beggin' strips with cream. Do you remember the taste of beggin' strips?
Balto: No, Boris. I can't recall the taste of bones... nor the sound of barking... nor the touch of snow. I'm... naked in the dark, with nothing, no veil... between me... and the wheel of fire! I can see him... with my waking eyes!
Boris: Then let us be rid of it... once and for all! Come on, Mr. Balto. I can't carry the serum for you. But I can carry you! Come on!

Yes Rico, kaboom.

[Anchorage looks like Kodi from the 3rd movie, and sounds like Steele]
[Wolfe looks like Steele; Kodi red-brown where Steele's black; has brown eyes, sounds like Balto]

Balto: Strangers from distant towns, friends of old, you have been summoned here to answer the threat of Nome. Nome stands upon the brink of destruction, none can escape it. You will unite or you will fall. Each citizen is bound to this fate, this one doom. Bring forth the ring, Anchorage.
[Anchorage puts the ring on a stand for all to see]
Anchorage: So it is true. In a dream, I saw the Eastern sky grow dark. But in the West, a pale light lingered. A voice was crying, "The doom is near at hand, Star's Bane is found."
[Reaches for the Ring]
Anchorage: Star's Bane...
Nikki: Anchorage!
Kaltag: [speaking the words engraved on the Ring] Ash Nazg Durbatuluk, Ash Nazg Gimbatul, Ash Nazg Thrakatuluk, Agh Burzum-ishi Krimpatul.
Balto: Never before has anyone dared utter words of that tongue here, in Imladris.
Kaltag: I do not ask for pardon, master Balto, for the Black Speech of Nenana may yet be heard in every corner of the West! The Ring is altogether evil.
Anchorage: It is a gift. A gift to the foes of Nenana. Why not use this ring? Long has my father, the Hero of Nome, kept the forces of Nenana at bay. By the blood of our fellow canines are your lands kept safe. Give Nome the weapon of the enemy. Let us use it against him.
Nikki: You cannot wield it. None of us can. The One Ring answers to Steele alone. It has no other master.
Anchorage: And what would a chow-chow know of this matter?
White Fang: This is no mere chow-chow. He is Nikki, son of Arathorn. You owe him your allegiance.
Anchorage: Nikki? This is Isildur's heir?
White Fang: And heir to the throne of Nome.
Nikki: Sit down, White Fang.
Anchorage: Nome has no King. Nome needs no King.
The Balto look-alike: Nikki is right. We cannot use it.
Balto: You have only one choice. The ring must be destroyed.
Buck: Then what are we waiting for?
Balto: The ring cannot be destroyed, Buck, son of Iron Will, by any craft that we here possess. The ring was made in the fires of Mount McKinley. Only there can it be unmade. The ring must be taken deep into McKinley and cast back into the fiery chasm from whence it came. One of you must do this.
Anchorage: One does not simply walk into Nenana. It's black gates are guarded by more than just Malamutes. There is evil there that does not sleep. The great eye is ever watchful. It is a barren wasteland, riddled with fire, ash, and dust. The very air you breathe is a poisonous fume. Not with ten thousand dogs could you do this. It is folly.
White Fang: Have you heard nothing Lord Balto has said? The ring must be destroyed!
Buck: And I suppose you think you're the one to do it?
Anchorage: And if we fail, what then? What happens when Steele takes back what is his?
Buck: I will be dead before I see the Ring in the paws of a Malamute! Never trust a Malamute!

Balto: I wish the ring had never come to me. I wish none of this had happened.
White Fang: So do all who live to see such times. But that is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us. There are other forces at work in this world Balto, besides the will of evil. You were meant to find the Ring. In which case, you were also meant to have it. And that is an encouraging thought.

Star: Do you know how the Malamutes first came into being? They were sled dogs once, taken by the dark powers, tortured and mutilated. A ruined and terrible form of life. Now... perfected. My fighting Uruk-Hai. Whom do you serve?
Wolfe: Star.

Is it wrong to love a wolf?

Nice. I did a coucil of Elrond earlier too :)

Yes Rico, kaboom.

Balto: Kaltag, forgive me.
Kaltag: Look at me. What did you see?
Balto: A dog. There was a white dog in a courtyard of snow. It was dead. The city was burning.
Kaltag: Iron Will? Is that what you saw?
Balto: I saw... I saw him. I can hear his voice in my head.
Kaltag: What did you tell him? Speak!
Balto: He asked me my name. I didn't answer. He hurt me.
Kaltag: What did you tell him about you and the Ring?
[scene cuts to later]
Kaltag: There was no lie in Balto's eyes. A fool... but an honest fool, he remains. He told Steele nothing of the Ring. We've been strangely fortunate. Balto saw in the Palantir a glimpse of the enemy's plan. Steele moves to strike Iron Will.

Wolfe: A great host, you say?
Balto: All Nome is emptied.
Wolfe: How many?
Balto: Ten thousand strong at least.
Wolfe: [astonished] Ten thousand?
Balto: It is an army bred for a single purpose: to destroy the world of dogs. They will be here by nightfall.
Wolfe: Let them come.

Balto: [to Anchorage and Wolfe] My fellow dogs tell me that you are Malamute spies.
Anchorage: Spies! Now wait just a minute!
Balto: Well, if you're not spies, then who are you?
[they remain silent, Balto sighs and sits]
Balto: Speak!
Wolfe: We are Dogs of Nome. Wolfe is my name and this is Anchorage.
Balto: Your bodyguard?
Wolfe: His friend.
Balto: And where is your skulking friend? That grangel creature. He had an ill-favored look.
Anchorage: [reluctant] There was no other. We set out from Barrow with seven companions. One we lost in Skagway. Two were my kin. A wolf there was also. And two dogs. Nikki, son of Togo, and White Fang of Haines.
Balto: [solemn] You are a friend of White Fang?
Anchorage: Yes, for my part.
Balto: It would grieve you then to learn that he is dead.
Anchorage: [shocked] Dead? How? When?
Balto: As one of his companions, I had hope you would tell me. He was my brother.

By the way, you can use Wolfe and Anchorage as characters in yours, too, if you want. Remember:

[Anchorage looks like Kodi from the 3rd movie, and sounds like Steele]
[Wolfe looks like Steele; Kodi red-brown where Steele's black; has brown eyes, sounds like Balto]

Is it wrong to love a wolf?

[Balto is attempting to choke Kaltag.]
Star: This is a bear claw. You've seen it before, haven't you Balto? Release him, or I'll cut your throat!
[Balto loosens his grip]
Balto: HgkEeeeee. HgEEEeeeeaaaaayyyaaaaaaaaa. [Camera shot to distant mountains, a distant scream is heard]
Balto: Oooouuuauuuaauuuhhhhh!

Balto: We wants it. We needs it. Must have the precious. They stole it from us. Sneaky little canineses; wicked, tricksy, false.
(dog side of Balto): No, not master.
(wolf side of Balto): Yes precious, false. They will hurt you, cheat you, lie.
(dog side of Balto): Star's my friend.
(wolf side of Balto): You don't have any friends. Nobody like you.
(dog side of Balto, after placing his paws flimsily over his ears): I'm not listening, I'm not listening.
(wolf side of Balto): You're a liar and a thief.
(dog side of Balto): No.
(wolf side of Balto): Bear killer...
(dog side of Balto): ...Go away.
(wolf side of Balto): GO AWAY! AAHahahahahaha!
(dog side of Balto): I hate you. I hate you.
(wolf side): Where you would you be without me? *Baauugghhlltooe* I saved us. It was me. We survived because of meeeeeee.
(dog side): Not anymore.
(wolf side): What?
(dog side): Star looks after us now. We don't... need you anymore.
(wolf side): What?
(dog side): Leave now, and never come back.
(wolf side): No!
(dog side): Leave now, and never come back.
(wolf side): Aaagheeeuuaaaaahhh!
(dog side): Leave now, and never come back! [Looks around] We... We told him to go away. And away he goes, precious! Gone, gone, gone! Balto's frreeeee!

Yes Rico, kaboom.