Things I learned watching The Shawshank Redemption

So I’m sure this has been done before, but I felt like taking a stab at the practice while re-watching the film tonight... Here it goes:

— If you own a gun, and haven’t used it, never ever throw that gun into a river
— Always hire Frank Darabont when adapting a Stephen King story to film, unless Stanley Kubrick is available
— If you are a new fish, don’t be fat and don’t be pretty
—(a small aside: ever since I first saw this film in my teens, Morgan Freeman has been one of the voices in my head, guiding me through mundane activities, and I don’t mind it one bit)
— You can trust in the Lord, but your ass belongs to the Warden
— Irish people develop a wicked tan while serving hard time
— Everybody hates the tax-man
— Karma is a bitch
— Be careful when retrieving rocks from an open field
— The world is in such a damn hurry
— It takes one letter a week for six years to receive $200 from the government
— Italian opera is quite frowned upon in prison
— Shady deals go down better with pie
— You have to go to prison to become a crook
— If you teach a fellow inmate how to read, the Warden will have that inmate shot
— A fart doesn’t count on a windy day
— Geology is the study of pressure and time
— You can judge a man’s intention by the condition of his shoes
— Always time your prison escape with a lightning storm
— If the Warden owns your ass, you’d better own his finances
— Never drink from a stream or river located directly outside a prison
— Again, Karma is a BITCH
— Always cross the border to Mexico at Ft. Hancock in a red convertible, Top-down
— Rehabilitation is just a made-up word for “Parole Granted”
— That weird rock you’re looking for is always the last rock you find
— Hope is a good thing
— Brooks was here (so was Red)
— The Pacific is indeed blue

So that’s that.
Feel free to add to the list, and thanks for reading!